What was I thinking? I was no bride and Sir John would never permit such conduct on his estate. I was ashamed of myself for harbouring such thoughts. That interview with the Comte had had a deeper effect on me than I had imagined.

My mother kept talking about Joel Derringham. I had to repeat what he had said to me. She was thinking romantic thoughts again. Oh, it was too foolish. She was telling herself that the indisposition was a myth and that as Joel had wished to make my further acquaintance, he had prevailed on his parents to ask me for the evening. Oh Mama, I thought, dear Mama, foolish only where her daughter was concerned. If she could see me satisfactorily settled she would die happily.

But she did indulge in the most preposterous dreams.

Margot came to the schoolhouse to see me. She was excited.

“What fun!” she cried.

“So you are coming tonight. My dear Minelle, Marie has found a dress for you, but I won’t have it. You are to have one of mine … straight from a couturiere of Paris. Blue for your eyes. Marie’s dress was brown. So ugly. I say: No. No. No. Not for Minelle, for if you are not exactly beautiful-as I am-you have something distinguished. Yes, you have, and I shall insist that you wear my dress.”

“Oh Margot,” I said, you realty do want me to come! “

“But of course. It will be fun. Maman will spend the evening in her room. She was crying this afternoon. It was my father again. Oh, he is wicked, but I suppose she loves him. Women do love him. I wonder why?”

“Your mother is not really ill, is she?”

Margot lifted her shoulders.

“It is the vapours. That is what Le Diable calls it. There might have been a quarrel. Not that she would dare quarrel with him. He does the quarrelling. If she weeps he gets more angry than ever. He hates women who weep.”

“And does she weep often?”

“I don’t know. I expect so. After all, she is married to him.”

“Margot, what a dreadful thing to say of your father!”

“If you don’t want the truth …”

“I do. But I can’t see how you can really know. Does she always shut herself away? Is it the same in your own home?”

“I suppose so.”

“But you must know.”

I don’t see much of her, if that’s what you mean. NouNou guards her and I hear she is not to be disturbed. But why do we talk about the mi I’m so glad you are coming, Minelle. I think you’ll enjoy it. You liked visiting us for tea, didn’t you? “

“Yes, it was fun.”

“What were you doing on the staircase? You had been exploring.

Confess. ” ” What were you doing, Margot? “p>

She narrowed her eyes and laughed at me.

“Come, tell me,” I insisted.

“If I tell you, will you tell me what you were doing? Ah, but that is not fair exchange. You were just looking at the house.”

“Margot, what are you talking about?”

“Never mind.”

I was glad to drop the subject, but I kept wondering about the Comte and Comtesse. She was afraid of him. That I could understand. She shut herself away and took refuge in her illness. I was sure it was to escape from him. It was very mysterious.

Margot took me to her room in the Manor. It was beautifully furnished and reminded me of the Comte’s bedroom. The bed was a four-poster, though slightly less ornate. The curtains were rich blue velvet and one wall was covered in a fine tapestry of the same tone as the curtains which was the predominant colour throughout the room.

The dress I was to wear was laid out on the bed.

“I am a little plumper,” said Margot, ‘which is good because that makes it easy. You are a little taller, but see, there is a deep hem.

I made the seamstress undo that at once. Now you will try it on and she shall come and make the alterations. I will send for her at once.

“Margot,” I said, ‘you are a good friend to me. “

“Ah yes,” she agreed.

“You interest me. Sybil… Marie … Pouff!”

She blew with her lips.

“They are dull. I know what they will say before they say it. You are different. Besides, you are only the schoolmistress’s daughter.”

“What has that to do with it?”

She laughed again and would say no more. I put on the dress. It was certainly becoming. She rang the bell and the seamstress arrived with pins and needles. In less than an hour I had my dress.

Maria and Sybil came to inspect me. Maria sniffed slightly.

“Well?” demanded Margot.

“What’s wrong?”

“It’s not really suitable,” commented Maria.

“Why not?” cried Margot.

“The brown would have been better.”

“Better for you? Are you afraid that she will look: more beautiful than you? Ah, that is it.”

“What nonsense!” retorted Maria.

Margot grinned at me. It is so,” she said.

And Maria said no more about the unsuitability of the gown.

Margot insisted on dressing my hair. She chatted as she did so. There, ma cherie. Is that not beautiful? Oh, yes, it is true, you have an air. You should not be condemned to spending your life teaching stupid children. ” She studied my reflection.

“Corn-coloured hair,” she commented.

“Cornflower-blue eyes and lips like the poppy.”

I laughed at her.

“You make me sound like a field of wheat.”

“Teeth even and white,” she went on.

“Nose a little … how do you say it? … aggressive? Lips firm … can smile, can be severe. I know what it is, Minelle my friend, that adds up to attractiveness. It is the contrast. The eyes are soft and yielding. Ah, but wait … look at that nose. Look at that mouth. Oh yes, they say, I am good-looking … I am passionate … but wait a bit. No nonsense, please.”

“Yes, please,” I retorted, ‘no more of this nonsense. And when I want an analysis of my looks and character I’ll ask for it. “

“You never would, because that’s another thing about you, Minelle, you think you know that little bit more than anyone else and can answer all the questions so much more correctly. Oh, I know you used to beat me in class … as you did us all … and that is right and fitting for the daughter of the schoolmistress, and now you teach us and tell us when we are right and wrong. But let me tell you this, my clever Minelle, you have much to learn.”

I looked at her dark laughing face with the fine almost black sparkling eyes, so like her father’s, the heavy brows, the thick dark hair. She was very attractive and there was some thing secretive about her. I thought of her joining me on thel spiral staircase. Where had she been? ? “Something you have already learned?” I asked. “Some of us are born with this kind of knowledge,” she said, I “And you are one of those so endowed?” I I am. ” The music was playing in the gallery where a small orchestra had been installed. Lady Derringham, gracious in pale mauve silk, pressed my ? hand when she saw me and murmured: ” It was good of you to’s help us out, Minella. ” A remark which, although spoken kindly, reminded me immediately of the reason why I was” here.

As soon as the Comte appeared I suspected he was responsible for my being here. He looked about the music room until his eyes alighted on me. He bowed from across the room, and I could see he was taking in every detail of my appearance in a way which I reminded myself was insulting. I returned his gaze haughtily, which seemed to amuse him.

Lady Derringham had arranged that I should sit with her daughters and Margot as though to remind the company that although we were present we had not yet been formally launched into society. We were not quite children and could be allowed to attend the soiree and supper afterwards, but we should be dismissed as soon as that was over.

I found it a tremendously exciting occasion. I loved music, in particular the works of the composer Mozart which figured largely in the concert. As I listened I felt transported and I thought how I should enjoy living graciously as many of my pupils did. It seemed unfair of fate to have set me outside it and yet not far enough away not to be able to glimpse it and realize what I was missing.

During the interval in the concert people moved about the gallery greeting old friends. Joel came over to me.

“I’m glad you came. Miss Maddox,” he said.

“Do you really think it would have been noticed if I had not? Would people really count and imagine doom was overtaking them because of unlucky thirteen?”

“We can’t know as the situation was avoided … most agreeably, if I may say so. I hope it will be the first of many occasions when you will visit us.”

“You can’t expect a fourteenth guest to default at the last minute merely to accommodate me.”

“I think you attach too much importance to this reason.”

I have to because but for it I shouldn’t be here. “

“Let’s forget that and be glad you are. What did you think of the concert?”

“Superb.”

“You are fond of music?”

“Extremely.”

“We often have concerts like this. You must come again.”

“You are very kind.”

This one is for the Comte. He is particularly partial to Mozart. “

“Did I hear my name?” asked the Comte.

He took the chair beside me and I was aware of his studying me intently.

“I was telling Miss Maddox, Comte, that you enjoy Mozart and that the concert was being given in your honour. May I present Miss Maddox.”

The Comte stood up and bowed.

“It is a pleasure to meet you. Mademoiselle. ” He turned to Joel.

“Mademoiselle Maddox and I have met before.”

I felt the blood rushing to my face. He was going to expose me. He was going to tell Joel how I had peeped into his bedchamber when I was supposed to be upstairs and imply how unwise it was to bring people of my station into a higher sphere. What a moment to choose! And typical of him, I was sure.