“What are you doing?” He was dressed, ready, and waiting for me to get up.

He set a chocolate croissant and a latte from Starbucks in front of me. “Morning, baby. I was so excited, I couldn’t sleep.”

I sat down at the table surrounded by boxes. “Excited about what?”

“I can’t tell you.” He was amped. “I just have to show you, but we can’t go until nine.”

I bit into the pastry. “Aren’t those the best?” he said.

“Did you eat one?”

“Yeah.” By that point he was at the counter checking his blood sugar with the meter. “Holy shit,” he said and then reached for his insulin pen. He gave himself a shot and then sat down next to me at the table. He still seemed a little hyper, but then I brought him down as soon as I opened my mouth.

“Are you worried that your children will get it?”

“Our children?”

“Yes.”

“Are you worried, Kate?”

“You’re the one living with it. Should I be worried?”

“If, God forbid, one of our children gets it, then I would be able to help them learn to live a pretty normal life. Despite the fact that neither one of my parents had it, they were still able to help me live the healthiest possible lifestyle. But, if that scares you too much, then we can adopt. I think we should anyway. I want a big family.”

“I think I do, too, and I won’t be scared if you’re not. I trust you.”

“Okay.” He leaned over and kissed my nose. “Now what’s the plan for tonight?”

“I told Dylan and Ashley if you were up for it that we’d meet them on the roof at midnight and drink champagne and bang pots and pans or whatever.”

“Sounds perfect.”

After I showered and got ready, we grabbed a cab and headed into the upscale Gold Coast neighborhood. We stopped in front of a building that I’m pretty sure was owned by Oprah. Jamie led me through the lobby toward the elevator. He inserted a key and pressed the button for the penthouse. We entered a vacant foyer and walked down a hall until we were standing in a large loft-style room with floor-to-ceiling windows overlooking Lake Michigan. The floors were a warm and inviting hardwood. Even though the space was empty, something about it felt like home. Maybe it was that I could see so much of my beloved city, or maybe it was because I was standing there with Jamie.

“So you want to buy this place?”

“Want to buy?”

“Yeah.”

“No.”

“What, then?”

He just stared at me with his hands shoved deep in his pockets. He shrugged and then rocked back a few times on his heels.

I squinted, scowling at him. “You! You already bought it?”

“Bingo.” He smirked, and oh, that goddamned dimple.

“For me?” I shrieked.

“Uh-huh. Well, for us, silly girl.”

“Oh my god, how much did this cost?”

His lips flattened. “Not very much, and anyway, I need the write-off.”

“Not very much by whose standard?”

“Katy, stop, seriously. There’s an amazing loft that will be the perfect place for you to read and write. Come see.” I followed him through an insanely clean and ultramodern gourmet kitchen to an open staircase and loft lined with bookshelves. There was a large window in the loft with the same gorgeous view looking out onto the lake. I was mesmerized; I couldn’t take my eyes off the water. The white outline from the snow and ice piled on the shore reflected so brightly, I had to squint. It was uncharacteristically sunny for that time of year. I imagined the snow melting and breaking away into the glimmering, still water.

“It’s beautiful.” I turned to see him watching me.

“It is now,” he said.

I smiled all the way to my ears. “Should we christen it?”

He stalked over to me, braced my neck, kissed me thoroughly, and then murmured, “Katy, you dirty girl,” right into my ear.

I grabbed his butt. “Well?”

He pulled back and took a loud, deep breath. “I’m sorry, baby. I need to eat. I’m feeling a little weak.” Jamie never complained about his diabetes, and because of that I wasn’t that aware of its impact on our lives. He was determined not to use an insulin pump, so I knew he was cautious. Exerting himself would make his blood sugar even lower.

I ran my fingers through the hair at the back of his neck and gazed into his eyes. He held me around the waist. I cocked my head to the side and stared dreamily at him.

“What?” he asked.

“I have a Balance bar in my purse. Do you want it?” He smiled kindly and nodded. “I love you, Jamie. Thank you for this. It’s the nicest thing anyone has ever done for me.”

“I love you, too.”

We started moving very gradually in a circle, still embracing each other, slow dancing to the sound of our beating hearts.

Remember playing hide-and-seek as a kid? You would run full speed away from the one who was “it.” Every time you played, you thought you’d found the best hiding place. You would sit, shaking with anticipation because even though the object of the game was the opposite, all you really wanted was to be found. You wanted to be found by the one who was “it.” For months, I had been hiding. I had run so far and hidden so well, I thought no one would find me, but then he did.

I had been only half awake until Jamie came into my life. I know now that it’s true, what they say: love cannot be taken out of you because it changes you. I woke up when I met Jamie. The world became louder, crazier, more exciting, and more achingly beautiful.

“Do you think it will always be like this?”

“I think there will be times when we’ll have to work at it.” He paused. “I’m willing to do that until the day I die if it means I get to hold you like this.”

• • •

On our way back to my apartment, I gave Jamie a good laugh when he asked if I was going to give him the New Year’s Eve kiss he’d always wanted.

“Well, I’m not gonna be kissing Dylan, not that he’s a bad kisser.”

“How would you know?” He seemed shocked but was still smiling.

“One day, Dylan and I went down to the basement laundry room and walked in on Stephen making out with some girl. This was in my ‘woe is me’ phase, mind you. Anyway, Dylan felt sorry for me so he pressed me against the wall and kissed me in front of the bimbo and Stephen. He put on a pretty good show.”

Jamie was clutching his heart, laughing hysterically. “You’re kidding.”

“No, I swear to God.”

He shook his head. “What a good guy.”

“Totally.”

“But he better keep his hands off you.”

“I don’t think you have to worry about that.”

Later that night, after kissing Jamie on the roof and toasting to the New Year with Dylan and Ashley, we were in bed by 12:10 on the dot. I woke up a few hours later to find Jamie gone from our bed. I discovered him in the living room, swaying and disoriented.

“Jamie, are you looking for your meter?”

For a second, when he looked up, it seemed like he didn’t recognize me, and then finally he spoke. He sounded like a frightened child. “Katy?”

I went to him and pulled him to sit on the couch. “Yes, baby, I’m here.”

“I feel nauseous.”

“Let me find your meter.” I got up and immediately found it on the counter. I rushed to him and nervously fumbled with the lancets for a few seconds until I finally pricked his finger and put the blood onto the meter tab. The screen read twenty. “You’re very low, baby. Hold on.” I ran into the kitchen and poured orange juice into a cup and then took it to him. He seemed extremely weak as he reached for it.

“I’m okay, Katy.”

“You need to eat.” I went to the kitchen and threw graham crackers, nuts, a cereal bar, a banana and some cheese on a plate. It took me less than thirty seconds. I ran it over to him and could tell he was already a bit more lucid.

He laughed. “What’s all this?”

“I didn’t know what you would feel like.”

“You are such a sweetheart.”

“Did this ever happen to you when you were alone?”

“If I felt low at night, it would wake me up. I would keep the meter by my bed. I think it must have been the combination of the long day and then the champagne. I’m glad I was here with you.”

“Me too.”

After he ate and we checked his blood sugar again, he fell asleep on the couch with his head in my lap. I sat there for part of the night, unable to sleep. I thought about Jamie and I together, going to Napa, getting married, starting a family, and coming back to Chicago every now and then. It started to become impossible to imagine my life without him. The ending to my book was the beginning of my life. It was the story of us, and how we came to be. What started out as a journey for one girl who kept herself hidden in the darkness became the story of two souls connected and growing together in the light. I couldn’t imagine exactly what the future looked like for us or where in the world we would be, but I knew that none of it mattered because we were becoming a part of each other. There was no other place but where we were, as long as we were together.

In the morning, Jamie asked me about birth control. We hadn’t talked about it, and I assumed he was leaving it up to me. I had an idea of where Jamie stood on the matter.

“I haven’t been using any. Should I?”

“No,” was all I said. He squinted his eyes curiously, and he flashed me a small, tight smile before looking back down at his magazine.

Jamie rented a car and decided we would road-trip it back to Napa since I would be taking some of my belongings. We moved everything else from my place to the new gorgeous apartment Jamie bought, and then we left Chicago. We hoped that we would see everyone at our wedding in the spring.