My brain was a blur of memories and feelings all jumbled together. He was talking about our past, not our present. “Three years ago?”
“I mean, I ignored it. Thought it was just some crazy crush,” he said, his hands bunching into fists. “But then this summer . . . things started happening between us and . . . all of those feelings came rushing back.”
My chest was heaving, my breaths were fluttery as I tried making sense of his words. That he’d fallen for me back then . . . and he still felt that way now.
“I can’t get you out of my head.” His breaths were broken. “I . . . never could.”
I squeezed my eyes shut. All of these emotions were bombarding me at once. I wanted to reach out to him, to tell him I felt the same.
But a part of me wanted to leave, if only to have the chance to think it all through. To get my heart and my head back in some semblance of order.
“Look at me, Rachel.” Kai gathered my face in his hands, and I whimpered at the feel of his rough calluses against my skin. “I want to be with you.”
Kai’s eyes turned dark—so dark—as they pooled with emotion. “I want to take care of you, spend as much time as I can with you.”
My heart ballooned painfully, threatening to burst out of my chest and float away.
His thumbs brushed lightly against my cheeks. “I’m so fucking in love with you.”
My throat jammed with emotion, as tears spilled over my cheeks in waves. His lips parted as he searched my eyes deeply.
But I couldn’t stop the onslaught of overwhelming sensations. I’d spent weeks—months—doubting, pining, and aching for this beautiful boy standing in front of me. It had culminated in this one moment, and my body responded by shedding more tears.
“Hey . . .” He pulled me into his chest. “I . . . fuck, Rachel. I have no idea why you’re crying.”
He continued to soothe me, his voice cracking on the words. “It’s . . . it’ll be okay . . . if you don’t feel the same way. I just . . . I needed you to know.”
I grabbed fistfuls of his shirt in an effort to tug him nearer. I tilted my head to brush my lips against his neck.
A guttural sound surged from deep inside his chest. Like a quiet roar of yearning and desperation.
I kissed his throat, tasting my own salty tears, and then slid my lips to his ear. “I’m madly in love with you, too, Kai.”
He sucked in a harsh breath, his eyelids shutting. I watched his nostrils flare and his brow smooth out, as he gathered his storm of emotions. When he opened his eyes, I saw so much longing reflected in them.
We stood motionless in the center of the sidewalk, gazing at each other. As if we were discovering each other all over again.
He grasped my fingers and yanked me into the nearest alleyway between two stores. A banner hung on a line, strung between two windows, and he ducked beneath it, pulling me with him. He turned suddenly and pinned me against the brick wall.
Then his head swung down, his lips delicately hovering near mine.
And it was the most delicious torment. Exhilarating and excruciating all at once.
To wait for the love of your life to kiss you.
“This is just a sample of what I want to do to you when I finally get you alone,” he growled. Our bodies aligned, and his heat and scent wrapped all around me. I felt the hard planes of his muscles pulsing against me. “I’m going to taste every fucking inch of your body.”
My dirty talker was back. And I thrilled to the sound of his voice.
“God, Kai,” I breathed out. “I missed you so much.”
My fingers clutched his hair, and I tried yanking his head down, frantic for our lips to meet. But he resisted, making me wait. My gaze was trained on his mouth, and it was agonizing to watch his tongue dart out to wet his lips.
His gaze seared into mine, penetrating and full. Searching, reaching, grasping for something.
“But I can’t share you, Rachel.” He firmly cupped my chin. “I won’t fucking share you with anybody.”
My heart lurched to my throat, making it hard to swallow. Let alone breathe. “I . . . I won’t share you, either.”
He clenched my hand and then placed my palm flat against his chest. I could feel the unrelenting rhythm of his heart. “You’ve never shared me, Rachel.”
The words tumbled from his lips like a prayer. And the back of my eyes burned with unshed tears.
He leaned forward, his gaze scorching and his voice husky. “I’ve always been yours.”
His tongue flicked out to taste my lips. “Only yours.”
I moaned at the very sensation I’d been craving for days on end.
His fingers gripped my neck, and his thumb brushed over the hollow of my throat.
My head fell back in a whimper, my entire body thrumming from head to toe.
I was desperate for him. Desperate to experience every single part of him.
He nipped at my bottom lip, and I opened my mouth to allow him entrance.
Into my heart. Into my world. Into my soul.
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