maple Americana end table beside the couch, “it’s not
• 88 •
WHEN DREAMS TREMBLE
about you.” She leaned down and softly kissed Natalie. “I’m a little turned
around these days. Sorry.”
“Thanks for the coffee.” Natalie didn’t reach for her because she had a feeling if
she pushed just a little harder than she had been, Dev would relent. And it
wasn’t about having her. Not entirely. She wanted her, but not like that. Not
when she knew something inside Dev would end up hurting more. “I understand,
by the way. If you want a sounding board sometime, anytime, I’m available.”
“Thanks, but it’s something that talking won’t change. Just some old stuff that
needs to stay in the past, where it belongs.” She retrieved her own coffee and
sipped. “I know the minute you drive away, I’ll feel like an idiot.”
“Good. You should.” Natalie wrapped the blanket around herself and stood.
“I’m going to take a shower. Do you have time to wait?”
“Sure. They make a good breakfast at the lodge. How about it?”
“I’ll be ready in Þ ve.”
v
Leslie awakened just before six, relieved to see the morning. The night had been
Þ lled with fragmented dreams and disturbingly erotic half-formed images of
making love with Rachel who became Dev who became Mike who became
Leslie herself in an endless loop of increasingly frantic and unrequited desire.
More distressing still, her body thrummed heavily with lingering arousal.
Surprised, she traced her Þ ngers between her legs and discovered that she was
wet. The ER
doctor had clearly been right when he’d said hormones might be at the root of
her heart and blood pressure problems, because something was deÞ nitely
amiss with her body.
While she enjoyed sex, it wasn’t something she ordinarily paid much attention
to. Certainly thoughts of making love never occupied her conscious mind or
disturbed her concentration. She couldn’t ever remember feeling as if she
needed sex. When it occurred, it was a pleasurable interlude. Even on the
infrequent occasions when she and Rachel spent the entire night together, she
couldn’t recall waking aroused, not even with Rachel’s body against hers.
Rachel particularly enjoyed sex in the morning, so they made love then, but
Rachel always initiated it. Leslie apparently was a good partner, as Rachel
always
• 89 •
RADCLY fFE
seemed satisÞ ed. As for herself, Leslie found being intimate with Rachel
pleasant, and she almost always achieved orgasm. And then it was over and she
was free to focus on the things that did occupy her mind.
She never woke up with the urge to be touched. Not like she had right now.
“What I have,” Leslie muttered as she abolished the remaining pieces of the
dream and headed for the shower, “is way too much time on my hands.”
No wonder she never took vacations. She was mentally and physically
completely out of sync. As she twisted on the shower knobs, she spoke aloud
as if that would ensure results. “All that’s about to change. What I need is a trip
to the ofÞ ce.”
By 6:30 a.m., she was dressed in casual business attire—slacks and blouse and
low heels. Briefcase in hand, she started along the path to the lodge, intent on
regaining control of her life. When she ran into Dev and her overnight guest, she
realized that her plan might turn out to be a bit more challenging than she
anticipated. Dev’s companion had her arm loosely around Dev’s waist, and she
looked relaxed and comfortable. ConÞ dent.
Leslie greeted them both politely, surprised when Dev blushed.
Natalie reintroduced herself, although Leslie remembered her name quite well.
“Going to work?” Dev asked.
“Yes,” Leslie said as they moved on as a group. She could have walked ahead,
but why give the impression that anything about the situation bothered her? Dev
had every right to entertain women in her cabin. Why should she care who
Devon Weber slept with?
“A working vacation?” Natalie asked pleasantly.
“More like a working visit.” Hoping to divert attention from herself, Leslie
asked, “How is the season going for you?”
“It’s gotten off to a better start than most,” Natalie said, shooting a quick smile
in Dev’s direction. “With the economy the way it’s been recently, we expect
more people to opt for less expensive vacations. It’s getting busy and should
stay that way all summer.”
“Do you have time to join us for breakfast, Les?” Dev asked, slowing as they
climbed the steps to the lodge.
Leslie opened the door and held it while Natalie stepped inside.
She glanced up at Dev, who hesitated in the doorway by her side. “No,
• 90 •
WHEN DREAMS TREMBLE
thanks. I’m just going to grab some coffee and see if I can borrow my mother’s
car. Hopefully, my father’s revived it.”
“If not, you can take my truck.”
“Thanks, I appreciate it, but I can always rent a car.”
“The offer’s open anytime.” Dev glanced after Natalie, who had settled at a
table on the far side of the room. “What about the other?”
“The other?” Leslie frowned, then realized Dev was asking about her health and
the yet-to-be-scheduled tests. “Oh. That. Just as soon as I check in with the ofÞ
ce up here. I’m not really sure how long I’ll be staying, so if I don’t see you
again, have a good summer.”
“I got the impression you were going to be here a few weeks.”
“The peace and quiet are starting to get to me.”
“Leslie, if it’s me—”
“It’s not you, Dev,” Leslie said sharply. How many more times could she let
Dev accept the responsibility for the pain they couldn’t seem to stop causing one
another? “Really. I need to get on the road before trafÞ c gets heavy.” She
gestured toward Natalie with a slight tip of her chin. “Your friend is waiting.”
Dev grabbed Leslie’s hand before she could move away. “Your mother has my
cell phone number. Call me if you need my truck. Or anything.”
Leslie closed her eyes and sighed. “Dev. You always were way too nice.”
“Don’t worry. I’ve grown out of that.”
“I don’t think so.” Gently, Leslie drew her hand away. “Take care, Dev.”
Dev followed Leslie with her eyes as Leslie disappeared into the kitchen. After
pouring a cup of coffee from the large urn on the sideboard, she joined Natalie.
“Ready to hit the buffet?”
“DeÞ nitely.” As they waited for the few people ahead of them to Þ ll their
plates, Natalie said, “Looks like you and Leslie have history.”
“We went to high school together. How did you know?”
“You can always tell. The way you look at each other, the shorthand sentences.
You know the sort of thing.”
Actually, Dev didn’t. She hadn’t had any friends other than Leslie in high school,
and since then, the people whose acquaintances she’d made were just that.
Acquaintances. But she didn’t comment. She was thinking that Leslie looked
even more run down and pale than she had
• 91 •
RADCLY fFE
when she’d Þ rst arrived. And she was willing to bet money that Leslie wouldn’t
schedule the tests that she was supposed to get.
Just then, Leslie came out of the kitchen, travel mug in hand, and strode briskly
through the dining room and out the front door. Dev wanted to go after her.
Leslie had said she might be leaving soon. That thought left Dev feeling hollow,
until she reminded herself she was being ridiculous. In fact, Leslie leaving was
the best thing that could possibly happen. Then they could both get on with their
lives without constantly reminding one another of something that had happened
long ago, but that still apparently had the power to hurt them both. Leslie was
doing the right thing. Making the correct choice. Dev took a deep breath,
absorbing that simple realization and enjoying the peace that went with it.
“Do you happen to have my permits for camping on the island?”
Dev asked.
Natalie looked startled at the abrupt change in subject, but nodded.
“That and the gear you’ll need to stay for four or Þ ve days. Everything should
be set for you by tomorrow.”
“Good. Then I’ll head out the day after tomorrow.” Getting away from
Lakeview and the memories that had sprung to life around her was just what she
needed, especially if Leslie was leaving. With any luck, she could get back to
work without constantly seeing Leslie’s face in her mind or hearing her voice or
just…remembering.
“Thursday. Hell,” Natalie said. “I have to be in meetings almost all day. But I
can get someone else to run you out—”
“No problem. I’m pretty sure Paul Harris will be able to do it.”
Dev touched Natalie’s shoulder. “Believe me, you’ve been a huge help already.”
“It’s no hardship.” Natalie reached under the table and brushed her Þ ngers
along Dev’s thigh. “I told you that the Þ rst day. Remember?”
“I do seem to recall something like that.”
Natalie stopped her teasing caress just short of Dev’s crotch. She wasn’t usually
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