I had mounted a staircase and was in a corridor when a hand came out and seized me. I was held tightly and kissed with fervour.

“Jonathan!” I whispered.

“I was waiting to catch you.”

The door of one of the rooms was open. He drew me in and shut the door.

“It seems so long,” he said.

I could see beyond him to where a shaft of moonlight fell on the court cupboard, which was close to the bed.

“Jonathan… please… we can’t stay here.”

“Tomorrow,” he said.

“No… No… Never again.”

He laughed softly.

“How many times have you said never and how many times have I proved you wrong?”

“It has to stop. I can’t bear it.”

“And I could not bear to stop.”

“We’ve got to, Jonathan.”

“Tomorrow afternoon,” he said. “They will go riding in the afternoon. You stay behind and go to the house. I’ll see you there. Dear old Enderby… in our room. You’ll be there, Claudine.”

“No… no,” I said.

“Yes, yes,” he whispered. “Three o’clock. Oh, my darling, I do long for you.”

I wrenched myself away. We could so easily betray ourselves. What if someone came into this room and found us here together? What if David…? We must stop. We were running too many risks.

I ran down the stairs.

My mother was in the hall.

“Don’t tell me you’ve found them already.”

“No. But it has occurred to me that the family have an advantage and it is not fair to the others. We ought to be handicapped or disqualified if we win.”

“I see your point,” said my mother. “Stay here then. You look flushed and hot anyway.”

So I stayed with her. I was afraid to wander through those darkened rooms and corridors in case I met Jonathan… in case we were seen together.

I realized to the full then how I should feel if David discovered my perfidy. He must never, never know. I must forget this infatuation. I must cut it right out of my life. It was so utterly foolish… so selfish to risk so much.

Evie was the first lady to finish and Harry the first man.

“I scent collusion,” I whispered to my mother.

“It’s understandable. Evie looks different. She looks really happy.”

Evie received the ivory fan adorned with hand-painted roses and Harry the pewter tankard. There was loud applause and by that time the hall was cleared for dancing and the music began.

According to tradition my mother opened the dancing with Dickon, and David and I immediately joined them on the floor. Harry and Evie danced together and Jonathan with Millicent.

Rather mechanically I went through the minuet and the cotillion, and in spite of my fears and resolutions, when I danced with Jonathan I felt the excitement surging up in me.

“I can’t wait until tomorrow afternoon,” he said.

“I can’t come.”

“You will,” he told me.

He was laughing, his blue eyes aflame; and I felt a rising resentment because he did not suffer remorse as I did. He was perfectly contented with what was taking place.

For the first time I began to wonder whether he enjoyed this situation because of the risks and that they added a fillip to his desire. Could he really enjoy deceiving his own brother, breaking the laws of honour and convention… and of religion? Was it then that my feelings underwent a change? I felt the same urgent desire; but rather naïvely I had imagined previously that he would feel the same as I did—carried away by passion, yes, but suffering remorse and a terrible regret that our emotions had forced us to behave in such a manner.

When the guests had all departed I was glad to retire to our bedroom.

David said: “You are very tired, Claudine.”

I replied that it had been a long day.

“I think it went well,” he continued. “Your mother certainly knows how to manage these affairs. It was very different here before she married my father.” He lay down beside me and said: “Isn’t it wonderful to see two people so much in accord as they are?”

“They spar a little.”

“It is all part of that relationship, that inability-to-live-without-each-other-ness. I am so happy that they came through safely and that he brought her home and they married. Moreover it has given my grandmother absolute contentment in her old age.”

He drew me to him.

“We shall be like that, Claudine, through the years.”

I clung to him and thought: He must never know. I would rather die than he should know.

He made tender love to me and there were tears on my cheeks.

“Claudine,” he asked, “what is it? Is something wrong?”

“Oh, David,” I said, “I love you. I do love you.”

He kissed me, and after he slept I lay awake staring into the darkness.

Why had I let it happen? How could I deceive this good man?

Boxing Day, so called because those who had served us during the year called at the big house for what they called their “box,” which was, in fact, a gift of money.

Dickon and my mother were seated in the hall while the ceremony was in progress, and a party of us went over to Enderby, as Millicent insisted that we had promised to show her the house.

There were myself, David, Millicent, Jonathan, Lord and Lady Pettigrew, and Gwen and John Farringdon with Harry. David had the key and when he opened the door and we went into the hall there were exclamations of amazement. It looked different by morning light. A little wintry sun shone through the windows and the place had lost something of that melancholy look; there was still an eeriness about it, though; that was something which could never completely disappear, I was sure.

Millicent said: “Is that the haunted gallery?”

“It is said to be so,” replied David.

“Something awful happened there, I daresay. I’m glad I’m not alone here. Then I should feel positively scared.”

“No need to,” replied Jonathan, smiling at her. “There’s a strong arm here ready to defend you from spectres with countless clanging chains and myriads of moaning ghosts.”

“Stay close to me,” commanded Millicent.

“No need to ask me that.”

It was ridiculous to feel hurt by his light bantering with Millicent, but I did.

David was saying: “What a change! That carpenter is very good. He’ll have the place in fair order within a few weeks, I’ll swear.”

“Aunt Sophie is very eager to move in,” I said.

“Poor soul,” murmured Gwen Farringdon. “Such an affliction! It has affected her deeply, hasn’t it?”

Lady Pettigrew said briskly: “A great misfortune. But such trials must be faced and she is fortunate to have escaped from those dreadful French peasants. I hope she is suitably grateful to you.” She beamed approval on Jonathan. “Now she can build a future for herself and it is a mercy this house is so near Eversleigh.”

It had always amazed me how people like Lady Pettigrew made so little of the misfortunes of those about them, and I could not help wondering whether she would be quite so dismissive of her own.

We mounted the stairs and went into the minstrels’ gallery. Now that the heavy red curtains had been taken down for cleaning and renovation it had lost much of that mysterious look.

Jonathan came up behind Millicent and said: “Boo!”

She jumped and turned round smiling at him. “You’re determined to scare me.”

“And I did,” he said. “Admit it.”

“Not with all these people about me.”

“Ah, but if they hadn’t been here…” He was laughing at her.

“You mean if I had been here alone with you! That’s not likely, is it?”

“Alas!” he said, with mock resignation.

I thought: That is how he is. That is how he is with me… and with every woman.

We went along the corridors and he opened the door of that room in which we had made such passionate love.

“Much of the furniture was already here, I believe,” said Gwen Farringdon.

“It went with the house,” David told her.

“What a gift! It will not need such a great deal more.”

“This is a nice room. I like this,” said Millicent. She went to the bed and sat down on it; then she lifted her feet and lay full length on it.

“It’s quite comfortable,” she said.

“I feel sure of that,” murmured Jonathan; he caught my eye and the corner of his mouth twitched a little.

I did not feel like sharing the joke. To me it was no joke. It was deadly serious.

We went over the house and found ourselves in the kitchens, which were vast and stone-floored.

There was one moment when Jonathan and I were alone; the others had gone through the screens and he and I stood a little way in the hall.

He caught my hand and said: “This afternoon.”

I shook my head.

He came closer and kissed me. I wanted to protest but I did not. It appalled me that he still had the power to charm me.

I was glad when the tour of the house was over and we came out into the fresh air.

We walked back across the fields and everyone was talking about Enderby, what a fascinating house it was, and how fortunate Sophie had been to have such a bargain fall into her hands.

“It is a pity all French émigrés are not so fortunate,” said Lady Pettigrew.

“She was so lucky to get away with her jewels,” said Millicent.

“And her life,” added Lord Pettigrew.

“She has Jonathan to thank for that,” David reminded them.

“How wonderful!” said Millicent, smiling at Jonathan.

“Oh it was simple,” he said lightly. “We went over and we came out with Mademoiselle Sophie and her maid and the clever creature had sewed the jewels in their garments and didn’t tell me until we were crossing the Channel.”