Madeline Sheehan - Unattainable

“Cut her some slack,” Eva said. “Look what happened to her mom.”

Deuce’s eyes cut in Eva’s direction. “Babe,” he bit out. “No fuckin’ shit. I feel for the kid, you know I do. Been takin’ care of her as much as she’ll let me but the truth fuckin’ stands, she ain’t old lady material. Her endin’ up with Cage means she’ll be where you are now and she ain’t got the right attitude for it. She’s still spittin’ mad, probably always gonna be too. Can’t have my club and my boys’ families fallin’ apart ’cause Tegen don’t know her fuckin’ place.”

“She loves your son, Deuce,” Eva said softly. “Always has. Doesn’t that count for something?”

Cursing, Deuce slammed the water off and stepped out of the shower. Reaching over the counter, Eva snagged a towel from the rack and tossed it in his direction. He dried off quickly and tossed the towel to the floor. Crossing the small distance between them, Deuce placed his hands on either side of Eva and leaned forward.

“Don’t count for shit,” he said gruffly. “Not here, babe. You love the man, you love the life. Simple as that. You know this fuckin’ shit.”

“And what if he loves her, too?”

Deuce paused. “You fuckin’ shittin’ me? Cage? You think he’s hard up for that little shit?”

Eva shrugged. “I think he could be. From what I saw, I think he’s nearly there.”

Not good. The last thing he needed was his only son falling balls-deep into something with a crazy hippie. Next thing he’d know, Cage would be running off to San Francisco wearing flowers in his hair or some stupid shit and then what? He’d be handing his club over to Ripper?

Fuck that bullshit. Ripper got his baby girl and that was all that fucking asshole was getting.

If what Eva said was true, that Cage was about to get caught up in a pussy full of quicksand, he was going to squash that shit. Right the fuck now.

“Come here, babe,” he said, hooking his hands underneath Eva’s arms and sliding her forward. “You want dick, you gotta five-minute window before I start snorin’.”

Eva pressed her lips together and her eyes danced with laughter.

“I love you,” she said, giggling.

He snorted. “Babe. Yeah.”

At the edge of town, the drop-off point, Dirty shut off his engine but remained seated on his bike. He wasn’t sure he was going to be able to keep his shit together. Not when he came face-to-face with Mooresville. Not after spending an entire weekend and then some seeing Ellie smile, listening to her laugh, watching her sleep from his makeshift bedroll on the floor, just taking it all in. Her light snoring, her sleepy-sounding murmurs and leg twitches, her kicking the sheets off, allowing him to see her T-shirt riding up her body, exposing her smooth stomach.

He hadn’t slept in days, afraid of having another nightmare and attacking her again, but he didn’t care. He was too wrapped up in her, shocked, confused, out of his mind, thinking constantly about the sound of his real name, the movement of her generous mouth as she said it, the feel of her wet skin under his hands, the pleading look in the alleyway.

He wanted to fuck her so bad it hurt. It hurt because he was terrified. Scared to death.

He’d been raped by a woman, raped by a man, and he’d raped women.

He’d never been with a woman. Not in the way other men were with women.

And he’d never kissed a woman.

Ever.

Fuck him, forget kissing, he couldn’t stand being touched. The thought of Ellie touching him…like that…gave him an erection from hell even as his skin crawled, rippling with disgust.

Yeah. Fuck that shit. Him and Ellie; that was never going to happen unless he dosed her. Which he was not going to do.

What he was going to do was make sure Mooresville either went to ground or kept his motherfucking distance.

Because, the one thing he did know for certain was that he didn’t want Ellie to leave. He wanted more smiles. More laughter. He just wanted to be around her. Or at least in the same town as her.

Maybe he could take her for a ride sometime…on the back of his bike.

“Fuck you!”

Dirty glanced over and found Cage up in Cox’s face, shoving the brother backward.

“Fuckin’ touch me again, little boy,” Cox growled. “And I will end you.”

Cage’s nostrils flared wildly. “Fuckin’ end me, you stupid spic motherfucker, fuckin’ do it!”

“I’m gonna end both of you if you don’t shut the fuck up!” Deuce roared.

Dirty rolled his eyes and looked away. Cage had been straight-up out of his mind ever since he’d woken up Tuesday morning and found that Tegen had snuck out in the middle of the night. He’d been drinking excessively ever since, picking fights and just plain being miserable.

Fucking women drama. Dirty shook his head. Maybe he should be glad he couldn’t be in any sort of normal relationship with a female. If the couples around him were examples of what relationships were like, he sort of felt lucky. He damn sure wasn’t emotionally equipped to deal with crazy bitches like Kami, Tegen, or even Danny, because as normal as she seemed, she’d killed a woman. Put two bullets in Ripper’s ex-girlfriend. Something like that definitely constituted as woman-crazy.

“Dirty.”

He glanced up to find Deuce standing beside him.

“Prez?”

“Dumbass is shitfaced,” Deuce said, jerking his thumb over his shoulder in Cage’s direction.

Well…duh. Cage hadn’t stopped drinking since yesterday morning.

“Need you to sit ’im, bitch, and take his ass home.”

Dirty’s brow hit his hairline. “Now?

“Yeah, fuckin’ now. You think I need him actin’ like this once Mooresville and his boys show up? Or how about for the fuckin’ drop-off. Tension’s gonna be high, everybody’s already expectin’ a fight. I don’t need my fuckin’ kid actin’ crazy ’cause he lost his brand new pussy.”

“I can fuckin’ hear you,” Cage slurred. “And I ain’t ridin’ bitch no-fuckin’-where.”

They both ignored him.

“Find someone else,” Dirty said. No way was he leaving, not before he saw the chief.

“No,” Deuce said. “I’m givin’ you an order, Dirty. Which means you fuckin’ do it.”

“Don’t do this, Prez,” Dirty said quickly as he jumped off his bike and got to his feet. “I need to be here. I need to make sure—”

Deuce grabbed his jacket collar and yanked him over his bike, then with a hard shove sent him stumbling backward.

“You think I don’t know what you fuckin’ need?” he yelled, advancing on him. “I been takin’ care of everything you needed since you were just a damn kid! Didn’t matter what or who you fuckin’ needed, I’ve always taken care of it, yeah?”

Dirty’s hands fisted at his sides. “You don’t fuckin’ get it, this isn’t—”

“I DON’T FUCKIN’ GET IT?”

Deuce’s thick arm shot out and his hand wrapped around Dirty’s throat. “I get it, Dirty,” Deuce growled low, bringing them face-to-face. “I fuckin’ get it. It’s you who ain’t gettin’ it. We got a lot of bank rollin’ our way tonight and if this shit gets screwed up ’cause you’re feelin’ a woman for the first time in your life, I will put your sick and twisted ass into the ground.”

Dirty’s adrenaline skyrocketed, causing his blood to race through his veins, his heart to pound harder, and his hands to shake. Deuce had never talked to him like this. Never.

“I’ve been lettin’ you run wild since I brought you here, doin’ whatever the fuck you felt like doin’, but it ain’t fuckin’ happenin’ tonight, not with the motherfuckin’ Russians. We need this shit to go down, the club needs this, and the fuckin’ Demons need this to go down without any bullshit. I get you’re givin’ a fuck about Ellie, I give a fuck too, but I give way more fucks about my boys and my family than I do some bitch that nearly got her ass killed ’cause she got drunk with the wrong fuckin’ man.”

“Prez,” he rasped, struggling to get a good breath. “He’s gotta go to ground.”

Deuce’s grip on his neck tightened. “Why?” he demanded. “’Cause he fucked with some bitch you’re feelin’? How many bitches you fucked with, Dirty? You need to go to ground too?”

Dirty stared into the eyes of the lone person who’d ever shown him any sort of kindness, who’d given him a family, friends, and a life, a man he respected and loved. A man he’d gladly die for. A man who, if he killed him, Dirty would consider it an honor to die at his hands.

“Yes,” he choked out. “I do.”

Deuce’s nostrils flared and his grip on Dirty’s throat fell away. Dirty immediately backed away, grabbing his neck and coughing. But before he could regain his bearings, Deuce’s fist cracked into the side of his face and right before he dropped to the ground like a sack of potatoes, Dirty could swear he felt his brain hit the top of his skull before settling back in its place.

“That’s once,” Deuce spat out, standing over him. “You say it again and I’ll break both your fuckin’ legs. Now, get your sorry ass up and get Cage the fuck outta here.”

Deuce reached down and offered him an arm. Dirty grasped forearms with the man and allowed himself to be helped up. Once on his feet, Deuce shoved him in the direction of his bike where Cox, Cage, Tap, and Mick were all staring at them.

“Stop standin’ around like a bunch of assholes,” Deuce growled. “Dirty, get my drunk fuck of a kid home and Cox, get your fuckin’ ass into sniper position.”

Dirty looked to Mick, who gave him a hard look that said to Dirty, “If you don’t get your ass into gear, I will beat you the fuck into the ground and then piss on your grave.”

“Let’s go,” he said, shoving Cage toward his bike. “But you fuckin’ touch me, asshole, and I will boot you off the back and run you the fuck over.”