K. Robinson - Twisted Ties

Breath. Breath.

Chest compression. Chest compression. Chest compression.

Breath. Breath.

I continued to work on her, refusing to give up.

“Emma, please breathe. Please, baby. Open your eyes,” I whispered as I pushed on her chest.

I would do anything, I would give anything to see her open her eyes. Tears ran down my face as time passed. I wasn’t doing something right, or she would be breathing by now.

Finally, Emma coughed, and water poured from her mouth. My heart leaped to my throat as I helped her roll over. She tried to suck in a breath, but she couldn’t because the water was still coming out of her mouth.

“Get it out, Emma. Come on, baby, breathe.”

She coughed again and then sucked in a breath. She coughed a few more times.

“Emma, are you okay?” I asked as I held her to me.

“My lungs hurt,” she managed to gasp out. “I hurt everywhere.”

“I know, I know. I’m here now. She’ll never hurt you again.”

I could hear police sirens in the distance. I prayed that Andy had managed to keep Ally on the bridge once I’d dived off of it. I wanted to watch as the police loaded her into the back of a cruiser to cart her ass off to jail. She could rot there for the rest of her life. I would make sure she stayed there. I’d never let her hurt Emma again.

I looked down at Emma and saw her, really saw her, for the first time. “Oh god, Emma.”

Her shirt was pushed up enough that I could see her stomach had been sliced open. Her arms and legs were covered in the same knife marks as well as both of her cheeks.

“She cut me.”

“I can see that. I’m so sorry, Emma.”

“Not your fault,” she whispered. She closed her eyes and laid her head against my chest.

The sirens were closer now. They sounded like they were almost to the bridge. I looked up to see if I could spot Andy, but he wasn’t anywhere in sight. Off to my left, I heard someone gasp. I looked over to see Andy emerging from the water.

“Andy? What the hell?”

“You hit Ally in the head with your foot when you dived in. You knocked her out, and she fell over the side, too. I tried to find her, but I couldn’t. Oh god, I couldn’t find her. She’s my sister, Jesse.”

I didn’t know what to say. Even though she was crazy, she was still his sister. He had to be hurting, but I couldn’t worry about him or Ally right now. I glanced down at Emma to see that she’d passed out in my arms. I had to focus on her. I had to protect her. Nothing else mattered.

The sirens were blaring on the bridge now. I looked up to see two police officers staring down at us. They hadn’t bothered to show up when we actually needed them. No, they’d waited until everything went to hell.

“We need an ambulance down here!” I shouted.

Emma moaned, and I pulled her closer to me. I wanted to protect her from the world.

“Everything will be okay. I’ve got you now, and I’m never letting you go again.”

I didn’t want to wake up. When I did, she would be there, waiting for me. I kept my eyes firmly shut as I willed myself to fall back asleep. My body felt strangely painless, and I didn’t want to know why. All I could remember from before I fell asleep was pain. It was everywhere. It had surrounded me like a fog, closing me off from everything else in the world. I didn’t want to feel it anymore. I knew it couldn’t be good that I felt nothing, but I embraced it.

Maybe I’m dead. Maybe that was why I felt absolutely nothing right now. If this were death, I welcomed it. The only regret I had was that I’d left Jesse behind. I’d also left without telling Andy, Lucy, or my dad good-bye. They would be so angry with me for leaving them like that, but I hadn’t had a choice. Surely, they would understand why I let go. The pain from her blows, the struggles, and her knife had just been too much to bear. No one should have to feel a blade slice through the skin over and over.

I hoped that Jesse never found out what she’d done to me. I knew him, and he was probably already beating himself up for my disappearance. That was just how he was. He pretended not to care about anyone or anything, but he did. He cared so much that the pain and guilt crushed him. This would cripple him. It would destroy him. I could only hope that Andy would help him through it. Both of them were so kind despite how they portrayed themselves to others.

Jesse’s face flashed before my eyes, and I smiled. He was so beautiful, and he had been mine. My smile slipped away as I realized that I no longer had a claim on him. Someone else would come along and take away his pain and guilt over me. He’d be whole again one day, and it wouldn’t be because of me. I prayed that he wouldn’t find comfort in Ally. He had to know that she’d had something to do with my disappearance.

I wondered if my mother would even care that I was gone. Would she cry when they told her I was missing? Would she cry when she finally found out that I was dead? I doubted it, but I hoped that she would miss me. Even if it were for only a day, an hour, a second, I just wanted her to feel something, anything for me. I regretted our last conversation. I wished that I had told her that I loved her. As much as I hated her, I loved her, too. She was my mother.

I hated the darkness surrounding me. Wasn’t there supposed to be a light that I followed into a peaceful oblivion? Had I missed it? I didn’t want to be stuck in this darkness forever. I wasn’t sure I could handle that.

“Her eyelids fluttered. Did you see that?”

I heard a voice. I could have sworn it belonged to my mother. It was muffled and sounded like it was far away. Maybe someone was here to take me from the darkness and lead me into the light.

I knew I hadn’t been a saint, but I couldn’t think of a thing I’d done to deserve this darkness. I’d never been particularly religious, but surely, if he existed, God wouldn’t send me to hell. I’d already been there, thanks to Ally. I just wished that if I were in hell, I could bring her with me. In my opinion, she deserved it more than I did.

“Emma, can you hear me?”

That sounded like Jesse. I smiled. If I could hear his voice, then this darkness wasn’t hell. It couldn’t be.

“Emma, it’s Daddy. Open your eyes, baby girl. We miss you.”

I really must be dead. There was no way that my mom and dad were both talking to me. For that to take place, they would have to be in the same room together. That hadn’t happened since right before they separated when I was younger.

“I just saw her eyes move again. Someone get the doctor.” My mom’s voice echoed through my head.

“It’s time to wake up, Emma. Come on, baby. You’re safe here. No one will hurt you.”

There was Jesse’s voice again.

I didn’t want to open my eyes, but I wanted to see him. It was probably just a trick of Ally’s, but it didn’t matter. I’d do anything just to see him again for a minute. I didn’t care if he wasn’t real.

I tried to open my eyes, but they refused to cooperate with me. They weren’t ready to face the world just yet. I decided that I wasn’t either. I’d much rather stay dead and never face the pain again. I let myself relax as I slipped into a peaceful oblivion.

“It’s been a week. Why isn’t she awake yet?”

“Emma went through a lot, Mr. Daniels. She needs time to heal, both mentally and physically. When she’s ready to wake up, she will.”

“You’re sure that nothing is wrong?”

“We ran tests when we brought her in. As you’re well aware of, she was beaten. Despite the condition of her body externally, she has no internal injuries. She had a concussion, but that was it. Everything else came back normal.”

“I just want her to wake up. I don’t know what I’m supposed to do to make that happen.”

“There’s nothing you can do, Mr. Daniels. You just have to wait for her to be ready. She has to want to come back to you. She’ll be ready one day. It could be tomorrow, next week, next month, but eventually, she will. I imagine that she’s trying to shut everything out to protect herself from what happened to her.”

“Emma, if you can hear me, I need you to wake up. You’re starting to scare me. I just want to see those beautiful eyes of yours.”

Jesse. It sounded as if his voice was muffled, like I was underwater. I tried to concentrate on it to break the surface. I just wanted to see him. That wasn’t too much to ask. I clawed my way out of the darkness. I have to see him. The darkness had protected me, but I was tired of it. I want light. I want him.

My eyes slowly opened. I blinked a few times as I tried to adjust to the brightness. After spending an eternity in darkness, the light was hard to accept.

“Jesse?” My voice came out as a hoarse whisper.

“Emma! You’re awake.”

His features slowly came into view as he hovered over me, blocking some of the light. All I could do was stare at him. He was the most beautiful thing I’d ever seen.

“Where am I?” It hurt so much to talk. I felt like gravel was embedded in my throat.

“You’re in the hospital. You’ve been here for almost two weeks.”

I closed my eyes as I tried to remember how I’d ended up here. I could remember nothing besides the chair Ally had tied me to. My eyes squeezed shut as I relived her hitting me, cutting me.

“Ally?”

“She’s gone. She fell off the bridge at the same time you did. Andy tried to find her, but he couldn’t. The water was too dark. It’s a miracle that I found you.”