No. She forced her eyes up, forced herself to watch that damn green line as it pulsed, the ridges and valleys becoming more and more indistinct.

If she turned her head, she wondered if she would sense Death’s presence, yet another silent, patient watcher in the room.

It was a creepy feeling, and suddenly Kerry felt afraid. As if sensing that, Dar moved closer, her body a wall of solid warmth behind Kerry, so close she could almost hear Dar’s heartbeat.

Kerry drew in a breath and released it, steadying her nerves.

Then she fixed her eyes on her father, only blinking a few times when the chest jerked, moved, then finally, gently, fell for the last time. It was accompanied by a soft, almost inaudible gasp.

The green line rippled, and went still. There was no alarm, no rush of nurses, just an eerie silence as everyone in the room seemed to hold their breaths.


84 Melissa Good And then it was over. Cynthia drew in a shuddering breath and started to cry.

“MS. STUART?”

Kerry looked up at the voice, surprised to find the doctor standing next to her. She was outside the CCU waiting room, taking a moment to settle herself before she went back inside. “Yes?”

“I’m very sorry.” Dr. Bridges put a hand on her shoulder. “If it’s any comfort to you at all, he had no awareness of what was going on.”

Kerry studied his face. “I know. Thank you. I’m glad. He’d have hated being like that.”

The doctor nodded. “So your mother said.” He paused. “Do you have…ah…plans yet, as to…”

Dar returned from her walk down to the water fountain at that moment and joined them. She glanced questioningly at the doctor, then at Kerry, who reached a hand out for her in reflex.

“There’s something being planned, yes,” Kerry said. “The family counsel is arranging things and taking care of the press.”

“Good.” Dr. Bridges exhaled. “Well, you take care, Ms. Stuart. I’m sorry I couldn’t have done more.”

“Thank you,” Kerry replied and watched him walk away. She turned and looked at Dar, feeling suddenly exhausted. “Ugh.”

Dar put an arm around her and pulled her into hug.

“C’mere.”

Kerry went willingly and abandoned herself into a dark, warm haven that smelled of wool and Dar and blocked out the reality of the coldly lit hospital corridor. She suspected she was still in shock, because it hadn’t even occurred to her to cry or feel sad, a mixture of regret and relief filled her instead. “You know something?”

“Mm?” Dar murmured very close to her ear.

“Now the hard part starts.”

Dar sighed. “Yeah.” She glanced into the waiting room, where she could see the pastor with his arm around a distraught Mrs. Stuart, next to Angie and Michael. Dealing with all the family now that the immediate crisis was over was shaping up to be a tough ride. “Sorry.”

Kerry exhaled, warming Dar’s skin right through her pullover. “Thank God you’re here,” she whispered. “But I’m sorry I’m putting you through this.”

Dar rested her cheek against Kerry’s hair. “I’m not sorry at all. So don’t you be either, Kerrison.”

Kerry tipped her head back and gazed up at Dar. “Do you Thicker Than Water 85

know, you’re the only person who has ever said that name in a way that makes me want to hear it more often?”

A tiny smirk appeared as Dar gracefully inclined her head.

“You do the same to me with mine. But don’t tell anyone, all right? It’ll wreck a lifetime of conditioning people not to use it.”

“No problem, Paladar.” Kerry found reason to smile, which felt strange after the past two days. “We’re going to have to go back to my parents’ house, you realize.”

Dar nodded. “I know.”

Kerry sighed and put her head back down on Dar’s shoulder.

“I don’t even know what to feel, Dar. Should I be crying?”

Dar was silent for a moment. “When they came and told us that Dad had died,” her voice was soft and reflective, “I didn’t cry at all.”

Kerry’s brows contracted. “Really?”

“Yes. Not for days. Then, I was at work and I was at my desk and…” A flash of that memory surfaced, twisting Dar’s guts. “It just hit me.” She paused. “That I was never going to see him again. And I lost it.”

“Mm.”

Even now, Dar felt the tears all over again. “I went into the Xerox room and locked the door and went to pieces for hours.”

Kerry thought about that. “Knowing how you feel about him, I’m not surprised. I don’t think that’s going to happen to me, though.”

Dar hugged her. “Maybe not. But give yourself a little time, okay?”

“Okay.” Kerry closed her eyes and wished it was over. “Dar?”

“Let me guess.” Dar gently scratched the back of Kerry’s neck and got a contented murmur. “You love me, right?”

“No,” Kerry said. “I love that you love me.” She gave Dar a big hug, then slipped an arm around her waist. “Let’s go get this started.”

“WAIT, MS. STUART! Can we get a statement!”

“Hold, on—look, that’s the brother, there. Go on!”

“Ms. Stuart, look this way!”

Kerry just kept her head down and kept walking, almost slipping as her boots stepped off the swept sidewalk and onto the snow covered parking lot. “Jesus.” She kept her hands in her pockets, aware of her uncles herding everyone along and her mother huddled between her and Michael. “Fucking ghouls.”

Cynthia Stuart’s head jerked up. “Kerrison!” she whispered, shocked.


86 Melissa Good

“Well, they are,” Kerry replied, as they dodged between two parked television news trucks and escaped the glare of spotlights.

Behind them, she could hear a spokesman yelling in vain for attention, and she was glad when the noise faded back, leaving them to the labored sounds of their own breathing and the crunch of snow underfoot.

The family limo and its driver were waiting for them, and doors opened quickly, allowing a gust of leather and wax-tinged warm air out. Kerry helped her mother inside, then stepped back.

“We’ll follow you.”

“Kerry, there’s room,” Angie protested. “Come on.”

“You go.” Kerry gave her a gentle shove and took a backwards stride almost into Dar’s arms. “We’ll be right behind you, I promise.” She closed the door behind Angie, then turned and let out a huge sigh, until she saw two reporters running their way, one with a camera balanced on his shoulder. “Oh, pud.”

Dar turned, saw them coming, and made one of the instanta-neous decisions that marked her long career. She stooped and grabbed a double handful of snow, then wadded it, let it go side-arm, and nailed the man with the camera right in the face. He stumbled, fell sideways on the ice, and knocked his companion right over.

“Let’s go.” Dar grabbed Kerry’s arm and plowed towards the rental car. “I’ll drive.”

“Oh no.” Kerry wrestled for the keys as they half walked, half slid together. “Now c’mon. Dar.”

“Let me,” Dar said. “For crying out loud, Kerry, I have an engineering degree. I can figure out how to drive on snow.” With a stern glare, she keyed the door lock and pulled the passenger side door open. “In.”

Kerry was about to argue, but spotted more reporters heading their way and decided she could always wrest control of the car from Dar after they got clear of the parking lot. She slid inside, closed the door, and leaned over to open the opposite one. Dar dropped in next to her and slammed the door, sending a tiny puff of snow cascading down the front windshield.

Dar cranked the ignition and turned the lights on to combat the fast gathering twilight. Then she paused, looking at the frosted windows. She pointed. “What the hell are you supposed to do with that?”

An exhausted Kerry stared at the window. “With what?”

“That.” Dar pointed at the ice. “Wipers won’t take that off.”

Kerry stared at her. “You use the defroster, Dar.” She leaned over and turned the device on. “What on earth did you think it was there for?”


Thicker Than Water 87

Dar frowned. “Clearing out the humidity when it rains.” She peered through the clearing glass, glad to see the reporters were now chasing the limo as it made its stately way out of the drive. It was cold out and she was shivering, unused to the damp chill which ate through her sweater and made her already aching shoulder throb. Add the fact that she’d left her medication at the hotel room and they’d missed lunch, and it made for a truckload of misery.

And now they were headed for more of it. Dar cautiously put the car in drive and pulled out of the parking space, following the tail lights of the limo. She tested the brakes and felt the lack of control in the car, her muscles automatically compensating for that. All right, Dar decided. I can do this.

She didn’t see Kerry half turned sideways in her seat, watching her with gentle, tired eyes, the faintest of smiles on her face.

“They going to want you to stay overnight?” Dar asked.

“Probably,” Kerry said.

“We don’t have a change of clothes.”

“We can sleep naked,” came the reasonable answer. “We usually do.”

Dar fought the desire to turn her head and stare at Kerry.

“Not in your family’s house, we don’t.”

“Mm.” Kerry exhaled. “That’s true.” She blinked slowly. “I have clothes left there, but I bet none of them fit.” The thought seemed to please her. “Maybe some old sweatshirts, if they didn’t get tossed, but definitely nothing that’d fit you.” She watched their progress along the street and grudgingly admitted that Dar was doing pretty well with the ice. “Maybe we should detour past the hotel.”