Maya Banks - Theirs to Keep

She shook her head, her cup sitting unattended on the table. She hadn’t taken a sip, too afraid her stomach would rebel. “I’m fine. Just say whatever it is you want to say.”

Merrick’s brows drew together at her tone, and he exchanged a quick look with Cade.

“What the hell do you think it is we want to say?” he demanded.

She swallowed nervously, her gaze skittering from side to side.

Cade’s eyes narrowed, and he cocked his head to the side as he stared at her every bit as hard as Merrick was.

“I don’t know,” she said in a low voice.

“But you’re worried,” Merrick persisted. “I can see it all over your face. You think we’re dumping you?”

She hesitated too long, and Cade swore. Then without another word, he pulled her from her chair and turned her toward the living room as he herded her out of the kitchen.

“Sit,” he told her when they got to the couch.

She perched on the edge, her palms slick and her stomach churning precariously.

Merrick sat in the armchair diagonal to the couch, his elbows planted on his knees.

“Look at me, baby,” he said in a soft voice that vibrated with intensity.

Cade slid onto the couch next to her. She lifted her gaze to meet Merrick’s, unconsciously holding her breath as she waited for what he had to say.

“Cade and I want to talk to you about our relationship and taking steps to make it more permanent.”

Her breath came out in a dizzying rush. They didn’t want to get rid of her. They were talking about making things permanent.

She was so light-headed that she had to lean over.

Cade’s hand slid over her shoulder. “Are you okay, Elle?”

She bobbed her head, sucking in deep breaths through her nose.

Merrick bit out a curse. “Baby, I don’t even want to know what was going through your head. But whatever it is you’re thinking, stop. Cade and I aren’t going anywhere. You aren’t going anywhere.”

“What did you mean by taking steps to make things more permanent?” she stuttered out.

“Dallas knows someone who can create an identity for you. Social Security card. Birth certificate. Paperwork so you can get a driver’s license,” Cade interjected. “As Merrick and I were discussing it, we thought that if we gave you one of our last names, then the other could marry you so you would bear both our names legally.”

Her eyes widened, and she stared between the two men in disbelief.

“Was that a proposal?”

Merrick grimaced. “Not a very well done one I’m afraid.”

Her heart leapt into her throat as she waited for an explanation.

“No, it wasn’t very well done of me,” Cade admitted. “I’m sorry, honey. I made a mess of this. But it doesn’t change what we want. We’d like for you to have both our last names and be legally bound to one of us. Marriage would give you protection and benefits.”

She glanced between them both, weighing their reactions and trying to decipher the motive behind the proposal. Were they just protecting her as they’d done for the last several months? Or was this something altogether different and…emotional?

“Is that the only reason you want to do this?” she asked.

“Hell no,” Merrick ground out. “I want you forever. I want you as my wife.”

Cade cleared his throat. “Merrick and I talked, and we agreed that, if you’re willing, we’ll give you my name first, and then you’ll marry Merrick in a legally binding ceremony. We like the sound of Elle Walker-Sullivan.”

“I do too,” she whispered.

Merrick pushed up from the chair and walked the few steps to where she sat. He went to one knee in front of her, closing his hands over hers in a tender gesture.

“I love you, Elle. I’d like nothing more than for you to marry me. But I want you to be sure this is what you want, and I don’t want us to put any pressure on you.”

She leaned forward until their foreheads touched. “I love you too. I was so scared. I thought for a minute that maybe you’d changed your minds…about me. About us.”

Merrick pressed his lips to hers in a gentle kiss. “Not going to happen, baby. We’re in this for the long haul.”

“Yes, I’ll marry you,” she said. “I don’t care about the past, and I’m tired of letting it control me. I’m ready to move forward. And if I never remember, that’s okay too. As long as my future is with you and Cade.”

Cade’s hand slid down her arm and came to rest over her wrist. She turned, leaning into his chest as she fitted her mouth to his. She kissed him and then snuggled into his embrace, resting her head on his shoulder.

He palmed the back of her head, holding her solidly against him as he stroked her hair.

“I love you,” she said against his neck.

“I love you too, sweetheart.”

“Are you okay with this? Me marrying Merrick?”

Cade pulled her away, a warm smile on his face. “Yeah, I’m okay with it. I trust Merrick. I trust you. And I trust that you love the both of us and that there’s room enough in your heart for us both.”

“You can’t imagine what this feels like,” she said. “To have hope and the promise of a future when I’ve been without either for so long.”

Cade pressed another kiss to her forehead. “Your future is with us, honey. Always. No matter what life throws at us, we’ll always be here with you.”

She glanced shyly back at Merrick. “When do you want to get married?”

“As soon as damn possible,” Merrick said. “We’ll call Dallas in the morning and get him started on the paperwork, and as soon as we can get that together and get you a driver’s license, then we’ll get married, and you’ll be Elle Walker-Sullivan.”

“I like the sound of it,” she said.

“So do we,” Cade said.

She inhaled sharply, gathering her courage tightly around her. There was no way for her to know if she could ever pull this off. They hadn’t even come close to deeper intimacy. Cade and Merrick had been very careful not to push her.

But it was time to see just where she stood in her recovery. No, seven months wasn’t a long time, but in her favor was the fact that she couldn’t remember her attack. If those memories would stay buried, maybe she would be okay.

She wanted to be okay.

She wanted to be touched and held. Loved. She wanted to be made love to. And she wanted to make love to them.

“What is it, baby?” Merrick asked in a husky tone.

“Will you… Will you and Cade make love to me?”

MERRICK’S NOSTRILS FLARED, AND CADE’S eyes ignited with quick fire. The two men stared intently at her, silent and assessing. They practically vibrated with anticipation. If she’d had any doubts about whether they wanted her in a physical capacity, she certainly didn’t now. In fact, they looked very much like they were straining to keep a tight leash on their response.

“Elle, are you sure, honey?” Cade asked.

“We don’t want to rush this,” Merrick said in a steady voice rich with patience. And love. “We have all the time in the world.”

“I want to try,” she said huskily. “I want it very badly. I’ve dreamed of having the two of you kiss me and touch me.”

“I’ve dreamed about it too,” Merrick admitted.

“Then make both our dreams come true,” she said.

Without saying anything further, Cade stood and held out his hand to her. Without hesitation, she slid her fingers over his palm and laced them with his, allowing him to pull her to her feet.

Merrick put his hand to her back and walked with her and Cade toward the bedroom.

The closer they got, the more nervous she became. It wasn’t that she was afraid. Or maybe she was. Just a little. What she feared most was not being able to go through with it.

They stopped just in front of the bed, and she simply stood there, uncertain of what to do next. If only she was bolder, more confident.

She needn’t have worried, because Cade and Merrick took the reins. Merrick pressed in close behind her, kissing her neck as his hands slid down her body to unfasten her jeans. Cade angled his head down to capture her lips, and he worked in opposition to Merrick, pulling up her shirt while Merrick divested her of her pants.

In a few seconds’ time, she was standing in only her bra and panties. The men’s hands were on her skin, their lips branding her flesh. Shivers of delight and anticipation licked over her body. She craved this. Craved them. She hadn’t realized just how much she’d wanted and needed this until now, when she was on the very brink of discovery.

She wanted to touch them. Wanted to please them. The instinct was deep and pressing, an overwhelming urge to bring them the ultimate pleasure.

Before she even realized what it was she was doing, she slid to her knees in front of them, her head slightly bowed. When she lifted her gaze once more, wanting to see them undress, she saw confusion in their eyes.

Merrick reached for her, gently pulling her upward once more.

“No way, baby. You don’t kneel in front of us. Ever. Come here.”

He tugged her into his arms and kissed her deeply, passionately. Before he’d always been so careful, always restraining himself, as if he always feared unleashing the full force of his desire on her.

Not so now.

She moaned softly under the bruising force of his kiss. She loved the power emanating from him. Needed it like a drug.

Cade’s hands coasted down her body, catching at her underwear and then pulling downward with a firm tug. And then his knuckles brushed her back as he unclasped her bra.