‘I had Doreen and three other kiddies, al who needed me. When I realized I was letting them down, I…’ The older man’s voice broke. Alex found his eyes burning. ‘I suddenly realized that Benji, if he knew how I was behaving, he would’ve been ashamed of me.’

Alex raised his knees, rested his elbows on them and dropped his head to his hands. Sand from his hands ground against his forehead but he didn’t care. He ached for Frank and for al the other man had been through, but their situations were not the same.

‘You going to join me for one last swim, lad?’

Alex nodded and fol owed Frank down to the water. He grimaced at the term Frank had used

— last swim. It sounded like a condemned man’s last supper. When his feet hit the water he had to admit that it felt that way too. He didn’t bother waiting for his body to adjust to the change of temperature. He dived straight in and started slicing through the water, pushing his body harder and faster. No matter how fast he went, his thoughts raced faster.

Kit’s house was finished. There was nothing more he could do here. It was time to return to Sydney, or…

Or what? Stay holed up in his hotel room like some damn hideaway?

He kicked his legs harder, pumped his arms faster, did lap after lap along the net of the Rock Pool until eventual y he thought his lungs would burst.

Pool until eventual y he thought his lungs would burst.

Halting, he shook the water out of his eyes and dragged an agonised breath into his body. Frank stroked up and down not too far away.

Given

Frank

and

Doreen’s

unrelenting

cheerfulness, the way they were always eager for a chat, Alex would never have guessed that they had met with such tragedy in their lives.

Frank’s voice sounded through him. ‘I had Doreen and three other kiddies, all who needed me.’

If his grandfather had taken Frank’s attitude when Alex’s mother had left home and married against his wishes instead of shoring himself up with bitterness and anger, he’d have gained a son-in-law and a grandchild who’d have loved him unconditional y.

Instead, he died with al his wealth, but not a soul at his bedside.

Alex shook his head, turned to rest against the net and stare out towards the channel. He couldn’t see Kit’s rock from here, but—

He froze.

In his mind he’d just given his grandfather a choice. That same choice was open to him too.

His stomach rol ed over and over as if he’d swal owed a gal on of saltwater. In his hurt, his grandfather had turned his back on the people he loved and had cut himself off. Frank had turned towards the people he loved. In providing them with the support and care—the love—that they needed, it had mended his heart.

He glanced at Frank and the message Kit had been trying to impart suddenly hit him. Love made a person stronger, not weaker. He pressed his thumb and forefinger to the bridge of his nose, his mind spinning. Turning away from love was the easy thing to do, but a real man didn’t turn away from the people who needed him.

The knowledge poured into him, making him feel ful er and more real than he had in weeks. Than he had in two years.

Memories of Chad pounded through him—Chad,

hot and grumpy from teething. Chad, tearing the Christmas wrapping from his presents one Christmas morning. Chad, completely absorbed watching a Labrador puppy. His chest cramped, a groan broke from him, but he didn’t push the memories away. He readied himself for crashing waves of grief, but…

The pain didn’t get any worse. It didn’t take him over, bury him or send him mad. It didn’t cover him in despair. And as he fol owed the memories as they flitted through his mind, he even found himself starting to smile. Chad had been a great little kid.

He’d brought laughter and love and tenderness into al the lives he’d touched. Into Alex’s life.

The answer to Kit’s last question came to him bright and shining and ful of promise then. He wouldn’t give back a single moment he’d had with Chad. If he’d known that one day Chad would be whisked away from him, he’d have done al he could to have spent more time with him, not less.

He couldn’t walk away from Kit and their baby.

They needed him. They loved him. Such a gift should be treasured. He should be giving thanks for it every day, not walking away from it. He should be doing everything in his power to make them happy—to make them feel as loved and blessed as he was.

He swore and scrambled for the shore and then swung back to grab Frank. ‘Frank, I’ve gotta go! I’l talk to you later, al right?’

‘Rightio, lad.’

Alex turned and bolted for the shore. When he reached the beach he bolted towards the car park, half-fal ing in the soft sand in his haste. Al he had to do now was convince Kit to take a chance on him.

Again. He swal owed and hoped he hadn’t stretched her love so far that it had snapped.

He hoped she would agree to see him.

‘Kit!’ Caro slammed her hands to her hips. ‘Get down from there at once! Pregnant women should not climb ladders.’

Kit tried to find a grin, but from the expression on her friend’s face it wasn’t a very successful one. ‘It’s only a stepladder. I’m only on the second rung. I’m barely two feet off the ground.’ She was trying to attach the wal paper frieze to the wal . She’d thought decorating the nursery might lift her spirits.

She’d thought wrong.

The wal paper frieze fluttered to the floor.

Decorating a nursery should be a joyous occasion. She hadn’t found much occasion for joy since Alex had left, though.

She pushed the thought away. She’d made a pact with herself to stop thinking about Alex. So she forced herself to grin again at Caro. ‘Ooh, look, pregnant woman on a stepladder! Must mean she’s going to fal .’ She gave a mock wobble, back-pedaling with her arms as if fighting to find her balance.

Caro rol ed her eyes. ‘In al the movies the woman only fal s when the hero storms into the room, so he can catch her in his arms and kiss her.’

‘Yeah, wel , not going to happen here.’ Her socal ed hero had roared out of town so fast they hadn’t seen him for dust. He hadn’t phoned, he hadn’t emailed, he hadn’t nothing! She bit her lip. She had been pretty adamant, though, and for once it seemed that Alex had listened.

She thrust out her chin. Darn man!

‘Jeez, Kit!’ A large shape loomed in the doorway and her heart hammered al the way up into her throat. ‘What the hel are you doing on a stepladder?’

Alex!

This time her wobble wasn’t feigned. She recovered herself and clambered down before she real y did fal . She wouldn’t let him catch her.

She couldn’t let him touch her.

‘What on earth are you doing here?’ She wasn’t dreaming, was she? She hadn’t conjured him up through the sheer force of her longing?

But, as his dark malt scent hit her, she knew she wasn’t dreaming. She wanted to cry. She’d just about rid her house of that scent.

‘Alex?’ She did al she could to make her voice hard and demanding, which was difficult given that she could hardly breathe.

He looked delightful y and deliciously adrift.

No! He wasn’t delightful y and deliciously anything.

‘Find me a meat cleaver,’ Caro muttered.

Decision suddenly stamped itself al over his face.

It took her breath away.

‘Caro—’ his hands descended to her friend’s shoulders ‘—if I can’t make this right I’l meat cleaver myself. You have my word on it. But until then—’ he propel ed Caro out of the door ‘—I need you to give me and Kit ten.’

‘Kit?’

It hurt her to see him. It was wonderful too. ‘It’s okay.’

Caro shrugged and held her right hand up to her ear as if holding a phone. ‘Cal me.’

Kit swal owed and nodded. ‘I wil .’

Caro left before Alex could close the door on her.

‘Leave the door open,’ Kit said as Alex went to close it.

Shadows chased themselves across his face. ‘So you can cal for Caro?’

No, so she could breathe! His scent beat at her, making her light-headed. Not that she had any intention of confessing that.

She cursed her weakness for this man. And then She cursed her weakness for this man. And then had to swal ow at the baby’s sudden activity. As if it too sensed Alex in the room and couldn’t contain its excitement. The thought sent pain shooting through her heart.

She folded her arms and lifted her chin, stared at his throat. ‘What are you doing here, Alex? As you can see, the work on the house is done.’ Except for the nursery. And Alex wasn’t interested in the nursery.

He wasn’t interested in the baby.

He wasn’t interested in her.

Final y, she lifted her eyes to his and her heart started to pound as loud and hard as their baby’s kicks. The expression in his eyes, it said otherwise

—that he was interested. Real y, truly, seriously interested.

She swal owed, stuck out a hip. She’d been wrong about him before.

A ridiculous shyness, a ludicrous nervousness, made her hands shake and tangled her tongue.