Danielle Steel - The Ranch

“I know, you're a saint. You just don't know you're lonely. Trust me,” Tanya said, and they all laughed.

“Forget all these guys, I'm going out with Benjamin,” Zoe said with a smile. He was an adorable child, and they had both liked him.

“Great choice,” Tanya said, and Mary Stuart said nothing, but asked them what they wanted to do about dinner with Hartley. Should they accept his invitation to sit at his table? “Why not? Maybe we'll get Mary Stuart all fixed up with him.”

“Relax,” Mary Stuart said soberly, “I'm still married.”

“Does he know that?” Zoe asked with interest. Mary Stuart wore a wedding band, but he might have wondered where her husband was and why she had come to the ranch with two women.

“He didn't ask actually,” Mary Stuart said, confirming her belief that he was only interested in friendship. “He asked where my husband was at one point, and I said in London.”

“Oh-oh,” Tanya said wisely. “You'd better clear that up. I think that's what he was asking, he may have gotten the wrong impression from that.” But what was the right one?

“I told him our marriage didn't survive when my son died,” she said casually.

“You told him that?” Tanya looked startled. That was a lot to say to a perfect stranger. But they had spent six hours riding side by side. It was more time together than some couples spent in a week's time, and he had been very interested in her.

“Maybe I should tell him I'm still married,” though she didn't know for how much longer. But somehow it seemed presumptuous to just volunteer that information. What if he really didn't care if she was married? “I'll see what seems appropriate. I really don't think he's interested like that,” Mary Stuart said demurely, and the other two hooted at her.

“You're both disgusting,” she said, and went to take a shower, while Zoe called Sam. She wanted to know what was happening in her office, but he was in a treatment room with a patient. And Annalee told her that everything was going smoothly. She went to lie down after that, and had a short nap before dinner. She was surprised at how well she felt when she got up. Sleep really made a difference.

The three of them dined with Hartley that night. He was intelligent, interesting, and wonderfully worldly. He had traveled everywhere, knew fascinating things, and knew all kinds of intriguing people. And more than that, he was a nice man, and was extremely polite about dividing his attention. He never left anyone out, and all three of them felt as though he enjoyed being with them. But when they walked back to the cabin afterward, and he accompanied them, he walked along beside Mary Stuart. And he spoke to her in a gentle voice that seemed meant for her ears and no others. Tanya and Zoe went inside when they arrived at their cabin, and Mary Stuart stayed outside with Hartley for a while. She wasn't sure how to bring it up, but she thought the others had made a good point that afternoon about telling him that she was married.

“I feel a little foolish saying this to you,” she explained, as they sat peacefully beneath a nearly full moon that shone blue on the snow atop the glaciers. “And I have no idea if it means anything to you, but I just didn't want to mislead you. I'm married,” she said, and was startled to see a look of disappointment in his eyes. “My husband is working in London for the summer. I realized that what I may have said to you might have given you a different impression. To be honest with you,” and she always was with everyone, “I'm planning to leave him at the end of the summer. I needed some time to decide what to do, but our marriage died with our son, and now I think it's time to move” on, put us both out of our misery, and end it.”

“Will your husband be surprised?” Hartley asked quietly. He was looking at her very intently. He barely knew her, and yet he liked her honesty, her kindness, and her directness. But he was sorry to hear she was still married. Perhaps, in the long run, it didn't make any difference. She sounded pretty definite about it being over with her husband. “Do you think your husband is aware of what you're feeling?”

“I don't see how he couldn't be. He's barely spoken to me for a year. We have no marriage, no life, no friendship. He blames me for our son's death, and I don't think anything will ever change that. I can't live like that anymore. I don't mean to tell you my problems, but I just wanted you to know that I am actually still married for the moment, although I don't think I will be for too much longer.”

“Thank you for being honest with me,” he smiled. It was incredible even to him how much he liked her. She was the first woman he had really liked since Margaret died, and after only one day, he was crazy about her. But everything here was in triple time. It was very much like being on shipboard.

“I hope you don't think I'm crazy for bringing it up, I just don't want to mislead you. I'm sure it doesn't make any difference to you… it's just…” She was suddenly mortified to have told him any of it, and she was stumbling over her words. What difference could it possibly make to him that she was married? She was suddenly furious with the other two for influencing her, and she felt really stupid. But as she sat there uncomfortably, he looked at her and he was smiling.

“I have no idea what I'm doing here, Mary Stuart. I wasn't even going to come here this year. I've been feeling sorry for myself for two years, and I haven't looked at another woman. And now suddenly here you are, like a bright ray of sunshine on the mountains, and all I can tell you is that I've never been so bowled over by anyone before. I have no idea what this will be, or what you want, or even what I do, or if you'd even be interested in me, but I just want you to know that I barely know you, but I care very much about you. I hate the fact that you lost your son,” he said, as he gently put an arm around her, and he pulled her slowly against his shoulder. “I hated the look in your eyes when you saw that little boy this afternoon, and I wanted to take all that hurt away from you. And actually, although I can't believe I'm saying this, I don't like the fact that you're not divorced, but I'm not even sure that that's important. I have no idea if you'll ever want to see me again after next week, and I'm probably making a terrible fool of myself, and if I am, tell me, and I won't do more than tip my hat at you for the rest of the trip.” His eyes were searching hers in the moonlight and hers were full of tears. They were all the things she had wanted Bill to say and he never had. He had completely abandoned her, and suddenly there was this stranger, answering all her prayers. “I just want to be with you, and talk to you, and learn about you… and then let's see what happens.” What more could one ask? She sat looking at him, unable to believe what she was hearing.

“Am I dreaming this?” she asked, looking at him with eyes full of tears and wishes. Was it possible to find someone like him?

“That's how I felt all afternoon today. Let's not look for any answers quite so soon. Let's just enjoy it,” he said, feeling her hair brush his cheek, he closed his eyes, breathing in her perfume. He didn't say another word, he just sat there, holding her for a long time, until he felt her begin to tremble. It was only partly from the chill, the rest was pure emotion. She had only arrived the day before, and seen him for the first time that morning. But she had read everything he'd ever written, and almost felt she knew him, and they had talked for hours and bared their souls, and they shared a powerful attraction.

“You're cold, I'll take you in,” he said, wishing he didn't have to leave her. She stopped and looked up at him, and once again he put his arm around her.

“Thank you for everything,” she whispered, feeling him close to her, and then he walked her to the door and left her there. She slipped inside, hoping the others had gone to bed, and she was grateful to find they had. But when she went into her own room she found a fax on her bed, from Bill. It was painfully simple.

“Hope all goes well. Work is satisfactory here in London. Best regards to your friend. Bill.” That was it. And at the bottom, in her lacy handwriting, Tanya had scrawled across the page, “If I were you, I'd call my lawyer.” It was certainly dry, and suddenly life was giving her a brand-new opportunity. A door was closing behind her, but another, just ahead, was beginning to open. And through it, she could finally see sunlight on the mountains.

The next morning, Zoe and Mary Stuart dragged Tanya out of bed together.

“Rise and shine!” Zoe said, as Mary Stuart pulled the covers off and took Tanya's mask off

“You're both sadists!” Tanya groaned, squinting in the sunlight. “My God, what is that… I'm going blind.” She rolled over on her stomach and refused to move as the other two pulled her off the bed just as they had in college,

“It's called sunshine, and there's lots of it outside,” Mary Stuart said, as Tanya sat slowly upright in pink shorty pajamas. “If I didn't know you better I'd think you were a drunk, the way you wake up in the morning.”

“It's just old age. I need a lot of sleep,” she said, staggering slowly to the bathroom.

“Well, Big Max is waiting,” Zoe added.

“Tell him to go back to sleep, he'll feel a lot better,” she said, yawning, but twenty minutes later she was dressed and showered, and she looked as spectacular as she did every morning. She was wearing pale pink jeans and a pale pink T-shirt, her old yellow boots, and a pink bandanna. Her hair was down her back in a long braid, and there were soft tendrils around her face that made her look incredibly sexy.

“That ought to catch your wrangler's attention,” Mary Stuart said, when she saw Tanya's outfit. She looked better than ever. “It's a shame you're so ugly.” Mary Stuart smiled at her, suddenly anxious to see Hartley. She had thought about him all night, and she felt like a kid waiting to see him that morning. For the moment, they were just friends, but the undercurrent of something more intrigued her.