"That's right, Leah," I said.

She lifted her eyes to my face, those big doelike eyes that were so haunted by fear.

"You're good, Miss Susannah," she said, "whatever they say. You're not like you used to be. ... You're not the same... ."

She did not know how disturbing her words were.

"Thank you, Leah," I said. "I should like you to tell me if there is anything wrong. If you are in need of help ... I want to help all the people on the estate... . Do you understand?"

She nodded.

"Well then, Leah, is anything wrong? You're worried about something?"

She shook her head. "I'm all right, miss."

I left her to give the milk to Granny Bell and rode back to the castle.

I was different. I cared about people. Susannah had never cared for anyone but herself. And they were beginning to notice this difference.

At dinner that night Emerald said she must write to Garth. It was a long time since she had heard from him.

I wondered about Garth. I had seen several references to him. All I knew of him was that he was the son of Elizabeth Larkham, who had been Emerald's companion in the old days. She had been a widow and Garth was her only son.

Then I forgot about him. I was so absorbed by the problem of Granny Bell and her cottage and Leah Cringle and her trouble.

I had fears of Leah's taking some violent action. I did not see how she could face a family like hers; she did not seem to be equipped to rebel against them. I had visions of her drowning herself in the stream which ran through the castle grounds, looking like Ophelia with flowers in her hair. Or finding some other means of ending her life. I had tried to talk to her several times but could make no headway. She always insisted that nothing was wrong.

Then two mornings later when I went to the cottage it was to find that Granny Bell was dead.

No one talked of anything then but Granny Bell. The district nurse came to lay her out and Jacks the gravedigger dug her grave. I went to the funeral and Malcolm came with me. I realized that there again I had surprised them all. Susannah had never been to funerals on the estate, though Esmond had now and then. He had often promised to go and when he did not attend would go along afterwards to tell the bereaved family what had prevented him. It might not have been the truth but it mollified them to a certain extent because it showed that he knew what was due the dead.

So I created quite a stir by going and I was glad, for my presence and that of Malcolm seemed to add to the ceremony simply because those who attended thought it did.

I felt tears in my eyes as I listened to the clods of earth falling on the coffin and thought of poor old Granny. At least she was at peace at last.

Malcolm took my arm as we walked away.

"You're really affected," he said.

"Who wouldn't be?" I replied. "Death is awe-inspiring."

"I know some who wouldn't, and who would find the death of anyone with whom they were not personally involved quite boring. That is just how you would have been once, Susannah."

He gripped my arm tightly and turned me round so that I was facing him. Moments like that were really frightening. I felt he must be on the point of telling me I was a cheat and a fraud.

"I often wonder ..." he began.

"What?" I asked faintly.

"Susannah, what has happened to change you? You've become so ... human."

"I always belonged to the species, you know."

"Flippancy solves nothing."

"Well, let me tell you I am just the same as I ever was."

"Then you put on a very good show of being something else."

"Oh, I was young and careless, I dare say."

"It was not a matter of youth and carelessness. You were ... a monster."

I pretended to ignore that. I went on: "Poor Granny! She was a good woman. She did her duty here all those years and was so grateful for living in that dark little cottage and being able to make ends meet."

He was silent and appeared to be deep in thought, which was disquieting.

As we went back to the castle neither of us spoke very much.

The next morning there was a caller at the castle to see me. It was a young man called Jack Chivers. He was employed by several of the farms, working when he was needed.

I saw him in the small parlor which led from the hall. He stood before me, nervously twirling his cap round.

"I had to speak to you quick, Miss Susannah," he said. "I want to know whether I have a chance of Mrs. Bell's cottage."

"Oh, but ..." I began. "Well, it is all but decided."

His face fell. "Then I'm sorry to have troubled you, miss," he said, and turned away.

There was something so despairing about the droop of his shoulders that I detained him. I noticed that he was about eighteen years old and good-looking.

I said: "Just a moment. Don't go yet. Why are you so anxious to have the cottage?"

"I want to get married, miss."

"Well," I told him, "you can wait awhile, can't you? There'll be other cottages in due course."

"We can't wait," he muttered. "Thank you, miss. I just thought there might be a chance."

"You can't wait," I said. And then: "Tell me who you are going to marry."

"Leah Cringle, miss."

"Oh," I said; and then: "Sit down a moment."

He sat down and I looked at him steadily. "Leah is going to have a baby, is that it?" I asked.

He flushed to the roots of his hair. Then he grinned, but it was not a grin of pleasure. Embarrassment and panic would describe it better.

"Yes, miss, that's about it. If we had a place to go to we could get married."

"Can't you get married without the cottage?"

"There'd be nowhere for her ... Leah would have to stay at Cringles' farm. Life wouldn't be worth living for her. The only way is for us to get married on the sly ... and then go into a cottage together."

"I see," I said. "Yes, I do understand. The roof has to be thatched, you know. You would want the place done up a bit."

He was staring at me incredulously.

I went on: "I can see how difficult it would be for Leah at Cringles' farm. I suppose I ought to say you should have thought of this before... ."

"I know, miss. You always ought to ... but somehow you don't. She's awful pretty and one day she was crying. Something had happened. Something's always happening at Cringles'... . It's all prayers and doing so much good and making everybody miserable. And then ... afore I knew what was happening ... and once it had begun it went on. I love Leah, miss, and she loves me and there's nothing we want more than our little baby... ."

I felt a great lump in my throat. I don't care what Jeff says, I thought. I don't care what Malcolm says. I'm the Queen of the Castle.

"All right," I said. "You shall have the cottage. There's no sense in delay. Get married and move in. You can clean it up, can't you? Better say nothing until you and Leah are married. The Cringles are odd people."

"Oh, miss, do you mean it?"

"I mean it. The cottage is yours. Go and tell Leah and don't forget it's a secret ... as yet."

"Oh, miss," he said, "I dunno what to say."

"In that case, say nothing. I know how you feel, so you have no need to tell me."

I rode straight over to Jeffs house. Malcolm was there. Malcolm was often there. One would have thought the castle was his by the way he concerned himself in its affairs.

I blurted out right away: "I've settled the business of the Bell cottage. Jack Chivers is having it."

"Jack Chivers!" cried Jeff. "He's only a boy. The Baddocks come before him."

"The Baddocks will have to wait. Jack Chivers is having it."

"Why?" demanded Malcolm.

I turned to him. "The castle estate is mine," I said. "I am the one who makes the decisions. I have already told Jack Chivers that he can have the cottage."

"But it seems unreasonable," said Jeff soothingly.

"In fact there is a very good reason why he should have it. Leah Cringle is going to have his baby. They want to get married right away. They need the cottage."

Both of the men were staring at me.

"Imagine Leah Cringle's living with those dreadful parents of hers," I went on passionately. "To say nothing of the old grandfather. Of course, she can't. I have a strange feeling that if something isn't done she will do away with herself. It's up to me to look after these people. Leah and Jack Chivers are going to have the cottage and there is an end of the matter."

I could see that both men thought it was foolish to allow a woman to make decisions. She responded to the urge of the heart and they, being shrewd businessmen, knew that the head should always rule.

I laughed inwardly. It was for them to remember that I was the one who commanded.

The next day I went over to the cottage and as I stood in the bedroom I heard the door open cautiously. I went down the stairs. Jack Chivers was standing there with Leah. They were looking round with rapturous wonder. The transformation in Leah was miraculous. I had never seen anyone express greater happiness.

And I had done this.

I experienced one of those supremely happy moments which come rarely and are usually brief when they do.

"Come to inspect your new home?" I asked.

Leah ran to me. Then she did a strange thing. She knelt and, taking my skirt by the hem, she lifted it to her lips and kissed it.

"Leah," I said, fighting back my emotion, "get up at once. Tell me, are you going to change the wallpaper?"