‘All those phone calls,’ sobbed Marigold. ‘An’ you’ve lost so much weight and never turning up to rehearsals.’

She moved towards him with her arms open.

‘Ay don’t mind where Ay live so long as it’s with you. Ay never really läiked this mansion. It’s a naightmare to clean, and Ay’ve never felt comfortable with servants and the boys will be delaighted to leave boarding-school and we’ve got enough food in the freezer to live on for ever.’

‘You don’t mean it? You’ll stand by me? Ow, Princess, ow, Princess.’

‘Oh Larry, Larry,’ said Marigold crying and laughing all at once as she flung herself into his arms. ‘Ay love you so much, Ay’d follow you to the hend of the earth.’


49



As President Gorbachov kept going abroad to distance himself from the growing domestic crises in Russia, so Rannaldini abandoned all thought of Christmas at Valhalla. He knew Venturer still had the clip of ‘Once in Royal David’s City’ and that he couldn’t silence blabbermouths like Mother Courage and Lady Chisleden. Harassed by enraged mistresses and a baying Press, Rannaldini decided, as a gesture of family solidarity, to take Kitty and his many children skiing and made sure that a delightful photograph of them all arriving at the airport was circulated worldwide.

Lysander felt sick when he saw it reproduced on the front of the Sun. He had been appalled, the morning after the play, to find Valhalla deserted except for Mrs Brimscombe who was sourly freezing boeuf bourgignon and who handed him a Christmas present from Kitty beautifully wrapped in red paper covered in polo ponies. Inside were chewsticks for the dogs, Twix bars for Arthur and Tiny and a dark blue jersey with Donald Duck on the front which Kitty had knitted for him. A card enclosed said: ‘Dear Lysander. This is to thank you for your many kindnesses. I hope you don’t miss your Mum and Georgie too much over Xmas, yours sincerely, Kitty Rannaldini.’

Lysander was utterly desolate. Earlier in December, Kitty had given him an Advent Calendar. Now he felt all the doors were closing on him. Returning to Magpie Cottage, he found Ferdie bemoaning his excesses the night before in The Pearly Gates and examining a green tongue in the mirror. On the strength of his success as the innkeeper he had managed to score with Miss Paradise ’90, the barmaid.

‘I told her I was off to the Gulf, too.’

‘That’s bloody dishonest. She’s a nice girl.’

‘What’s bitten you?’ said Ferdie in amazement.

‘Rannaldini’s taken Kitty skiing.’

‘That is terrific,’ said Ferdie. ‘I have to congratulate you. I never dreamt you’d get Kitty looking that good, almost attractive, in that green dress the other night — and to get Rannaldini back as well. He’s never taken her on holiday before. I’m going to give you a massive Christmas bonus,’ he added as Lysander’s face blackened. ‘You’re off to Brazil. Bastard coffee billionaire giving his ravishing young wife the run-around. Here’s the ticket.’ Ferdie reached for his brief case.

‘I don’t want to go to Brazil,’ said Lysander mutinously.

‘You’ll get some seriously good polo.’

After Christmas in the extremely fashionable French ski resort of Monthaut acquiring a suntan and being photographed on every piste surrounded by children, Rannaldini was bored rigid and decided to fly home. Christmas, like the snow, had temporarily blotted out all gossip. Natasha left with him. To shake her out of her shock at his affaire with Flora, he despatched her to Barbados for a holiday.

Kitty got no such compensation. She was to stay on in Monthaut over the New Year to keep an eye on Rannaldini’s children and the au pair, who was very pretty and expected to go out skiing and clubbing in the evenings, leaving Kitty in charge. At no time had Rannaldini apologized in any way for Flora’s revelations.

Wearily, Kitty drove back from dropping him off at the airport. Rannaldini had been particularly ratty over Christmas. In her distress at not being able to say goodbye to Lysander, Kitty had left several scores and clothes that he needed in Valhalla, although she felt he would have complained whatever she had picked. She was desperately short of clothes herself. She hadn’t brought anything for the evening, no ski clothes and no boots for walking on the polished ice, so, as Rannaldini loathed her spending money, the drive to the airport was her first outing. Even with chains on the wheels, she had been terrified of the winding, treacherous roads.

She felt safer when she reached Monthaut. Horses with bells jangling on their bridles, which reminded her of Arthur, were pulling sledgefuls of tourists along the High Street. Beautiful girls with vivid brown faces and enviably narrow hips strode purposefully over the frozen pavements. The Hotel Versailles, where Rannaldini always stayed, was the best in Monthaut. South-facing, yellow-stoned, overlooking the village square with its statue of President de Gaulle and a wonderful view of the mountains, it was two minutes’ walk from the main ski lifts. Snow and icicles glittering from the gables were melting slightly in the sunshine.

As Kitty crept in through the swing doors, every table in the foyer was occupied by glamorous, chattering, sunburnt people. It was several seconds before she recognized the most glamorous of them all. He was wearing a Donald Duck jersey and knocked over his glass of Kir as he jumped to his feet.

‘Lysander,’ whispered Kitty.

Her delight was so unmistakable that Lysander nearly kissed her properly, but, as she ducked her head in embarrassment, he made do with hugging her.

‘I fort you was in Brazil.’

‘I got bored and I missed you. I’m going to teach you to ski.’

‘I ’aven’t got any gear.’

‘I’ll buy you some. I haven’t given you a Christmas present. Thank you for the Donald Duck,’ he looked down, ‘he’s the best present I’ve ever had. I hope he doesn’t have to go into quarantine when we go back to England.’

Tucking his arm through hers as he led her towards the lift, he asked her if she had been given anything nice.

‘Rannaldini gave me a filing cabinet and Hermione some chopstick ’olders,’ Kitty giggled, ‘an’ a red sloppy jumper big enough for a helephant. “I know you like them baggy, Kitty.” Ooo, I am ’appy to see you, Lysander.’

Feeling dreadfully guilty about abandoning Rannaldini’s children to the sulky au pair and feeling embarrassingly ostentatious in a lime-green, violet, harebell-blue and shocking pink ski suit, ‘I look like a rinebow ’ippo,’ Kitty took to the slopes.

‘You must have lots of protection,’ said Lysander, rubbing Ambre Solaire into her pink cheeks and painting her mouth with mauve lipsalve before dropping a kiss on her squashed nose.

He was looking very flash in a tight daffodil-yellow bomber jacket and ski pants, and a kingfisher-blue sweat band keeping his curls out of his eyes, which were covered with black wrap-around glasses. He’d streaked his face and his beautiful big mouth with different coloured lipsalves like an Apache. Behind him, dazzling white peaks reared up against a sapphire sky. Chalet girls, PAs from Knightsbridge, glamorous divorcées on the prowl, au pairs who’d escaped, gazed at him in wonder.

‘I feel like a new-born foal wiv a banana skin attached to each hoof,’ protested Kitty. ‘Ooooh — I’m going to fall over again.’

‘No, you’re not,’ encouraged Lysander. ‘Stand on the edge of your skis, that’s right, now lean forward, sticks behind, sticks behind! Don’t cross them! Well done, Kitty.’

‘Weeee, I can do it.’ Kitty got so carried away, she skiied several yards. ‘Ow, my legs are going, ’elp, ’elp.’

Soon her suit of many colours was covered with snow. It was true what they said about the mountains making you feel all tingly and excited. All her tiredness had vanished.

Lysander had taken her to a comparatively deserted slope, and such was his total preoccupation with teaching her and his growing awareness of the delicious curves of her body since she’d lost all that weight that neither of them realized that the snow around them had been invaded by photographers and reporters, sliding all over the place, gabbling into telephones and tape recorders. For a horrific moment, Kitty thought they were on to her and Lysander, but they were all gazing up the mountain.

‘He’s on his way down,’ announced a reporter from the Daily Mail, switching off his telephone.

‘James Whittaker says the kid’s got a strong American accent, so Rupert must have got it from Texas,’ said a predatory blonde.

‘I thought he and Taggie were going to adopt from Bogota.’

‘Probably decided he wanted something more Aryan.’

‘Evidently the kid’s the spitting image of Rupert. It’s amazing how these adoption societies match them up.’

‘They must have got it very quickly. Taggie’s miscarriage was only a few weeks ago,’ said the Sun photographer.

‘Could be an illegit of Rupert’s he’s trying to palm off on Taggie,’ suggested the predatory blonde.

‘Oh, Beattie, you would think that.’

‘Taggie looked miserable last night and she hasn’t skiied since she’s been out here,’ said Beattie Johnson of The Scorpion shirtily.

‘She’s just lost a baby, stupid.’

‘If it is Rupert’s,’ Beattie was not to be deflected, ‘it means that he has been unfaithful to Taggie, because Nigel says the kid can’t be a day over three and he’s been married to Taggie nearly six years.’

‘Hush, here they come.’ The world’s Press adjusted their long lenses and switched on their tape recorders as a very blond child in huge dark glasses and a striped blue and white ski suit came whistling down the slope. For a second, it looked as though he was going slap into an elderly American in fuschia-pink who was gingerly picking herself up.