“Indeed I can. You had escaped in a shroud only to find yourself in a similar position.”

“And there is nothing more depressing. Moreover, it was winter, for the siege had lasted three months. It was the same as it had been before ... lack of food, sickness and what looked like inevitable surrender. ‘I will not fall into Stephen’s hands,’ I said. ‘I will not. I will not.’ And those about me just looked at me sadly and shook their heads. They did not understand my fierce determination.

“I sat at my window. The wind was blowing a blizzard, and the river below my window was one thick sheet of ice. It would be weeks before it melted even though the weather changed tomorrow. Then I had an idea. There was no moon. Clad in white, one would not be distinguished from the scenery ... and on the other side of the river was freedom.”

I caught my breath in admiration for this woman. I was not surprised that Henry admired her so fervently. She was indomitable.

“I sent for a dozen men I trusted,” she went on. “I told them the plan. We should wrap ourselves in white furs and let ourselves down from the window onto the ice, and silently we would cross it to the bank. And that, my dear daughter, is what we did.”

“And when you had crossed the river?”

“Then we walked ... in that bitter wind, we walked. But my spirits were lifted because once more I had had a miraculous escape. It was six miles to Abingdon. It seemed more like forty. But at last we arrived. There we found horses and made our way to Wallingford.”

“I suffered great hardship during our crusade, but I think you suffered more.”

“I had a cause to fight for and that buoys up the spirit. It carries one through adversity.”

“But you had so many defeats.”

“Yes, but I always thought that in the end I should succeed. I was not sure how, but I was the rightful heiress of England and I believed that justice would be done in the end.”

“Tell me what happened at Wallingford.”

“We were exhausted. We took food first, I think, and then we slept and slept ... and I had the most wonderful awakening. When I opened my eyes, standing by my bed was the one I loved best in the world: my boy Henry. I thought I was dreaming. I struggled up and stared at him. He flung himself into my arms. ‘I am here, Mother,’ he said. ‘Uncle Robert brought me. I am here to fight for you.’ It took me some time to realize that he was actually beside me. But there also was my good brother Robert. He had been to Anjou. He had not been able to bring Geoffrey, that wastrel husband of mine, but he had brought my beloved son.

“What a joyful reunion that was! What a day! After that night of adventure to come to this. I shall never forget that descent on ropes down to the cold ice; and then to come here and find my boy waiting for me ... it was wonderful.” She smiled and the softening of her face was remarkable. “Just a boy ... but ready to fight. You know the power of him. He only has to appear to make you feel that because he has come all will be well. Do you feel that too, my dear?”

I nodded, feeling too moved to speak.

“I think you know the rest. It is common knowledge. Robert brought up my boy to be a soldier, but my cause was a lost one. The people of England had rejected me ... and they would continue to do so. I might be the King’s daughter, but to them I was a German and they do not like Germans. Stephen, for all his weaknesses, was preferable.

“My brother Robert was very wise. He knew that further fighting could only bring us defeat, and I could not hope for more miraculous escapes. I had been lucky to have achieved that twice. It would be tempting fate, said Robert, to hope for more. But he had great belief in Henry. ‘One day,’ he said, ‘he will take what is his but we must wait for that day.’ I knew he was right and I believed that although the people of England would not accept me, when the time came they would take Henry.

“There was nothing vindictive about Stephen ... nor about his wife. They wanted peace. She was a deeply religious woman; he was easy-going. That was well for us. I stayed in England for five years after that, living mostly at Gloucester or Bristol. And meanwhile Henry was growing up ... learning to become a soldier. Robert took charge of his education, too. I have Robert to thank, in part, that Henry is the man he is today.”

“And it has all worked out well. England will one day be Henry’s.”

“With no more fighting. When Stephen dies ...”

“That cannot be very long now,” I said.

“Five years ... ten years. In the meantime Henry has a great deal to look after here. There will always be vassals ready to seize opportunities to rebel. But I thank God that in time he will be King of England.”

The bond between us was growing stronger. She had shown me a vulnerable side to her nature which few saw. In her turn she understood my feelings for Henry, and each day she let me know in many ways how contented she was with the match.

She was delighted when I was able to tell her that I was pregnant once more.

“You will be the mother of many sons,” she said, and she embraced me warmly. “Sons,” she went on. “Although I deplore this denigration of our sex, what power they bring to a family.”

“I wish William’s health was better.”

She nodded gravely. “You will soon have others, my dear. The only way to guard against sorrow in one’s children is to have a quiverful.”

Now our talk was all of babies. I often smiled to think of two women such as we completely absorbed in this domestic talk.

It was October. Henry had not yet returned when a messenger arrived at the castle. He came from the Archbishop of Canterbury.

Stephen had died unexpectedly of a flux. Henry, Duke of Normandy, was now King of England; and it was imperative that he cross the sea at once and lay claim to his kingdom.

Messages were immediately sent to Henry. He came to Rouen without delay. There was no time for anything but intensive preparation. He was taking an army with him, for how did he know what he would find on the other side of the Channel?

“You must come with me,” he said. “You must be crowned with me. A king is not a king until he has been crowned.”

Matilda’s eyes were shining with triumph.

“It is the moment I have been waiting for,” she said. “Everything will be worthwhile now.”

“You must come with us,” cried Henry. “You must see me crowned.”

“And what of Normandy? Because of this great prize, are you going to forget your lesser possessions?”

He threw back his head and laughed.

“Is not my mother a great general? Let me tell you this: there is not one that I value as I do her.”

So she must remain in Normandy and we should set sail.

It was with emotion that I bade her farewell.

“Alas that you are not with us,” I said.

“My place is here,” she answered.

“It is sad that after all you have done you cannot see him anointed.”

“I shall be happier here knowing that Normandy is safe.”

So we left, my baby William with us and the other in my womb. Petronilla was in my suite. It was comforting to have my family around me.

And so to Barfleur to embark for England.

Queen of England

THE WAVES WERE LASHING the coast; the wind shrieked a warning to all mariners; and we were drawn up at Barfleur contemplating that menacing sea and thinking of our new kingdom which lay on the other side of it.

It is impossible to cross in such weather, was the general verdict. No ship could be sure of doing it. It would be thrown about and all on board drowned.

Henry could never bear delay. He looked at the angry sea and gnashed his teeth. I thought he was going to fall into one of those rages which I dreaded. I had seen only a few of them but they were terrifying. No. Surely he would not dare show his rage against the heavens at such a time.

He gritted his teeth and said: “We sail.”

Sail in this weather! We were all aghast.

They tried to dissuade him. Perhaps by tomorrow the sea would be calmer.

He shouted at them. We were not waiting until tomorrow. We were sailing that very day. The ships were seaworthy. He could not wait. Rough seas could go on for months. December was not the month he would have chosen to set sail, but Stephen was dead and England without a ruler. It was a hazardous situation for any country to be in. He was not going to risk disaster just for the sake of a trip across the water. It happened to be a time when he had inherited a kingdom for which he had waited many years, and he was not going to allow a little wind to stop him taking it.

Never shall I forget that crossing. I do not know how we survived it. I was pregnant too, and in any case suffering certain discomforts. I should have demanded that we wait for more clement weather; but not even I argued with Henry when he was in his present mood.

He could not stand still. He strode about the deck, ever watchful. I remained below. I could not face the terrible pitching and tossing of the vessel. My condition made me feel really ill, and I knew that Henry would not care to have sick females about him. He never would, and certainly not at such a time. He was in a fever of impatience to claim the throne.

It seemed that we suffered this torment for hours; and then one of my women told me we were in sight of land. I staggered onto the deck. There was no sign of the rest of the convoy.

Henry wanted to get ashore at once. He would not wait for the others. He would go straight to Winchester.

As we rode along, people came out to look at us. I realized that they had not been expecting the arrival of their new King, for they could not believe that any could cross the Channel in such weather. Already they were recognizing him as a man of power since he defied the elements and with a jaunty nonchalance.