In the chapel they could do no more than exchange hidden smiles. After Mass, Arthur went riding and Catalina went to break her fast. After breakfast was her time to study with her chaplain and Catalina sat at the table in the window with him, their books before them, and studied the letters of St. Paul.

Margaret Pole came in as Catalina was closing her book. “The prince begs your attendance in his rooms,” she said.

Catalina rose to her feet. “Has something happened?”

“I think he is unwell. He has sent away everyone but the grooms of the body and his servers.”

Catalina left at once, followed by Doña Elvira and Lady Margaret. The prince’s rooms were crowded by the usual hangers-on of the little court: men seeking favor or attention, petitioners asking for justice, the curious come to stare, and the host of lesser servants and functionaries. Catalina went through them all to the double doors of Arthur’s private chamber, and went in.

He was seated in a chair by the fire, his face very pale. Doña Elvira and Lady Margaret waited at the door as Catalina went quickly towards him.

“Are you ill, my love?” she asked quickly.

He managed a smile but she saw it was an effort. “I have taken some kind of chill, I think,” he said. “Come no closer. I don’t want to pass it to you.”

“Are you hot?” she asked fearfully, thinking of the Sweat which came on like a fever and left a corpse.

“No, I feel cold.”

“Well, it is not surprising in this country where it either snows or rains all the time.”

He managed another smile.

Catalina looked around and saw Lady Margaret. “Lady Margaret, we must call the prince’s physician.”

“I sent my servants to find him already,” she said, coming forwards.

“I don’t want a fuss made,” Arthur said irritably. “I just wanted to tell you, Princess, that I cannot come to dinner.”

Her eyes went to his. “How shall we be alone?” was the unspoken question.

“May I dine in your rooms?” she asked. “Can we dine alone, privately, since you are ill?”

“Yes, let’s,” he ruled.

“See the doctor first,” Lady Margaret advised. “If Your Grace permits. He can advise what you should eat and if it is safe for the princess to be with you.”

“He has no disease,” Catalina insisted. “He says he just feels tired. It is just the cold air here, or the damp. It was cold yesterday and he was riding half the day.”

There was a tap on the door and a voice called out. “Dr. Bereworth is here, Your Grace.”

Arthur raised his hand in permission, Doña Elvira opened the door and the man came into the room.

“The prince feels cold and tired.” Catalina went to him at once, speaking rapidly in French. “Is he ill? I don’t think he’s ill. What do you think?”

The doctor bowed low to her and to the prince. He bowed to Lady Margaret and Doña Elvira.

“I am sorry, I don’t understand,” he said uncomfortably in English to Lady Margaret. “What is the princess saying?”

Catalina clapped her hands together in frustration. “The prince…” she began in English.

Margaret Pole came to her side. “His Grace is unwell,” she said.

“May I speak with him alone?” he asked.

Arthur nodded. He tried to rise from the chair but he almost staggered. The doctor was at once at his side, supporting him, and led him into his bedchamber.

“He cannot be ill.” Catalina turned to Doña Elvira and spoke to her in Spanish. “He was well last night. Just this morning he felt hot. But he said he was only tired. But now he can hardly stand. He cannot beill.”

“Who knows what illness a man might take in this rain and fog?” the duenna replied dourly. “It’s a wonder that you are not sick yourself. It is a wonder that any of us can bear it.”

“He is not sick,” Catalina said. “He is just overtired. He rode for a long time yesterday. And it was cold, there was a very cold wind. I noticed it myself.”

“A wind like this can kill a man,” Doña Elvira said gloomily. “It blows so cold and so damp.”

“Stop it!” Catalina said, clapping her hands to her ears. “I won’t hear another word. He is just tired, overtired. And perhaps he has taken a chill. There is no need to speak of killing winds and damp.”

Lady Margaret stepped forwards and gently took Catalina’s hands. “Be patient, Princess,” she counseled. “Dr. Bereworth is a very good doctor, and he has known the prince from childhood. The prince is a strong young man and his health is good. It is probably nothing to worry about at all. If Dr. Bereworth is concerned we will send for the king’s own physician from London. We will soon have him well again.”

Catalina nodded, and turned to sit by the window and look out. The sky had clouded over, the sun was quite gone. It was raining again, the raindrops chasing down the small panes of glass. Catalina watched them. She tried to keep her mind from the death of her brother who had loved his wife so much, who had been looking forward to the birth of their son. Juan had died within days of taking sick, and no one had ever known what was wrong with him.

“I shan’t think of him, not of poor Juan,” Catalina whispered to herself. “The cases are not alike at all. Juan was always slight, little; but Arthur is strong.”

The physician seemed to take a long time and when he came out of the bedchamber, Arthur was not with him. Catalina who had risen from her seat as soon as the door opened, peeped around him to see Arthur lying on the bed, half undressed, half asleep.

“I think his grooms of the body should prepare him for bed,” the doctor said. “He is very weary. He would be better for rest. If they take care, they can get him into bed without waking him.”

“Is he ill?” Catalina demanded, speaking slowly in Latin. “Aegrotat? Is he very ill?”

The doctor spread his hands. “He has a fever,” he said cautiously in slow French. “I can give him a draft to bring down his fever.”

“Do you know what it is?” Lady Margaret asked, her voice very low. “It’s not the Sweat, is it?”

“Please God it is not. And there are no other cases in the town, as far as I know. But he should be kept quiet and allowed to rest. I shall go and make up this draft and I will come back.”

The low-voiced English was incomprehensible to Catalina. “What does he say? What did he say?” she demanded of Lady Margaret.

“Nothing more than you heard,” the older woman assured her. “He has a fever and needs rest. Let me get his men to undress him and put him properly to bed. If he is better tonight, you can dine with him. I know he would like that.”

“Where is he going?” Catalina cried out as the doctor bowed and went to the door. “He must stay and watch the prince!”

“He is going to make a draft to bring down his fever. He will be back at once. The prince will have the best of care, Your Grace. We love him as you do. We will not neglect him.”

“I know you would not…it is only…Will the doctor be long?”

“He will be as quick as he can. And see, the prince is asleep. Sleep will be his best medicine. He can rest and grow strong and dine with you tonight.”

“You think he will be better tonight?”

“If it is just a little fever and fatigue, then he will be better in a few days,” Lady Margaret said firmly.

“I will watch over his sleep,” Catalina said.

Lady Margaret opened the door and beckoned to the prince’s chief gentlemen. She gave them their orders and then she drew the princess through the crowd to her own rooms. “Come, Your Grace,” she said. “Come for a walk in the inner bailey with me and then I shall go back to his rooms and see that everything is comfortable for him.”

“I shall go back now,” Catalina insisted. “I shall watch over his sleep.”

Margaret glanced at Doña Elvira. “You should stay away from his rooms in case he does have a fever,” she said, speaking slowly and clearly in French, so that the duenna could understand her. “Your health is most important, Princess. I would not forgive myself if anything happened to either of you.”

Doña Elvira stepped forwards and narrowed her lips. Lady Margaret knew she could be relied on to keep the princess from danger.

“But you said he only had a slight fever. I can go to him?”

“Let us wait to see what the doctor has to say.” Lady Margaret lowered her voice. “If you should be with child, dear Princess, we would not want you to take his fever.”

“But I will dine with him.”

“If he is well enough.”

“But he will want to see me!”

“Depend upon it.” Lady Margaret smiled. “When his fever has broken and he is better this evening and sitting up and eating his dinner, he will want to see you. You have to be patient.”

Catalina nodded. “If I go now, do you swear that you will stay with him all the time?”

“I will go back now, if you will walk outside and then go to your room and read or study or sew.”

“I’ll go!” said Catalina, instantly obedient. “I’ll go to my rooms if you will stay with him.”

“At once,” Lady Margaret promised.


This small garden is like a prison yard. I walk round and round in the herb garden, and the rain drizzles over everything like tears. My rooms are no better, my privy chamber is like a cell, I cannot bear to have anyone with me, and yet I cannot bear to be alone. I have made the ladies sit in the presence chamber, their unending chatter makes me want to scream with irritation. But when I am alone in my room I long for company. I want someone to hold my hand and tell me that everything will be all right.

I go down the narrow stone stairs and across the cobbles to the round chapel. A cross and a stone altar are set in the rounded wall, a light burning before it. It is a place of perfect peace; but I can find no peace. I fold my cold hands inside my sleeves and hug myself and I walk around the circular wall—it is thirty-six steps to the door—and then I walk the circle again, like a donkey on a treadmill. I am praying; but I have no faith that I am heard.