Miller and McAvoy were there in a split second. I hadn’t even realized that McAvoy could move that fast in his state. Soon, they had my arms behind my back and were hauling me away from Vin. My own brother, and I had been ready to fucking destroy him over one dipshit comment.

I shrugged the guys off of me and ran a hand back through my hair. I needed to fucking get my shit under control.

“What the fuck is wrong with you?” Vin yelled.

“Why the fuck are you provoking him?” Miller asked. “You’ve known he’s been with the same chick for a while.”

“Stay out of this, Miller,” Vin snapped. Vin took a step forward and got in my face. “You think she’s changed you? I’ve known you since you were twelve fucking years old. You’ve been scamming girls into fucking your dumbass for nearly as long. And now, you’re getting up in my face for pointing that shit out?”

I wanted to punch him. I wanted to fucking lay him on his guido ass. I wanted to bury him with his words. He lived in my fucking house. He played in my fucking band. He could learn how to fucking treat a brother.

“I don’t need to hear this shit.” I turned and walked toward the door.

“You’re just going to fucking back down and walk away?” Vin taunted me.

“I’m going to fucking get out of here before I beat the shit out of you.”

“All of this over one chick?”

I stopped with my hand on the doorknob. “Just think, Vin, more pussy for you.”

Shit was still tense between Vin and me backstage at the next ContraBand show. We’d rehearsed during the last week, but there had been no chance of us trying my new song when neither of us could see eye-to-eye on anything. It was our last show before the Poconos music festival, and we couldn’t even agree on a set for tonight.

A part of me refused to see reason in what Vin had said. I could do whatever the fuck I wanted with whoever I wanted. If that meant I was spending all my time with Aribel and not fucking dumb useless chicks, then I was entitled to that choice. But the other part of me saw exactly what Vin had spouted. Could someone do a one-eighty in a couple of months? I hadn’t gotten my dick wet because of her. Is it even worth that?

It was fucking Ari. I wanted to say yes. I’d told her she was worth waiting for. But just hearing Vin talk about it had made me second-guess everything I’d offered her at the beach. I was some uneducated jackass with no future and more than a few skeletons in my past. My reputation was warranted because the line of girls I’d fucked stretched from one end of the state to the other. Had I actually changed? Or did I just want to believe I had for her?

And just thinking about all of that fucked with my mind.

I should have been preparing myself to go onstage for our show. Instead, I was drinking like a fish backstage, trying not to think about how much of a fuck-up I was. I’d gone onstage wasted before, but my heart had been into it. Right now, the only thing my heart was into was the bottle in my hands.

“Hey, babe, you got a light?” I asked a chick standing near me.

Her big brown eyes stared up at me with reverence, and all I saw were her tits.

She fished in her purse and produced a lighter. “Let me do that for you.” She cupped her hand around the cigarette hanging between my lips and then flicked the Zippo to light it.

“Thanks, darlin’.”

I pulled a drag on the cigarette and then breathed the smoke out into her face. I preferred to smoke weed, but I hadn’t gone to see my guy in, like, a fucking month, so this would have to do.

“Anytime,” she said.

She wasn’t even offended that I’d just fucking blown smoke into her face. She was actually leaning into me. Damn, chicks are so easy.

“What are you doing later?” she asked.

Not her—that’s for damn sure. “You know, you have a familiar face.”

The girl scrunched up her nose. “I’ve been to all your shows.”

“Oh, yeah?” I breathed in and puffed out the smoke into her familiar face again.

She nodded slowly and placed her hand on my chest. Yeah, so not happening. There was brown hair where there should have been blonde, and brown eyes where there should have been hurricane blue.

“Huh. You know Aribel Graham by any chance?”

The girl straightened, flustered. “Aribel?” she snapped. “I think we have classes together,” she said with a shrug. “Blonde, kind of weird, always with some guy. Benjamin, I think?”

I stumbled a step backward. What the fuck? No way. No fucking way. Not my Ari. A pang of jealousy shot through my chest. I hadn’t been with anyone else since fucking September, and Ari had still been seeing her ex-boyfriend? I thought I’d gotten rid of Benny on day one.