K. Linde - Take Me for Granted

But fuck…

Virgin?

That was a four-letter word in my vocabulary. Most dudes liked virgins. They got off on the idea of taking someone’s purity, claiming her innocence. Not me. Not ever.

Ari’s eyes were wide as she stared up at me expectantly. And I had no fucking clue what to do. Instincts told me to back away slowly and then get the hell out of here. This was a shitty situation. I’d fucked dozens and dozens of girls. I shouldn’t be the one to take this from her.

“I should have told you earlier,” she said, tugging her clothes back on. She stood and crossed her arms over her chest.

“Why didn’t you?” I demanded.

Her hurricane eyes clouded over. “I wasn’t going to tell you at first because I didn’t think we would end up here. Then, the further and further we progressed in…whatever this is, I just couldn’t force the words out.”

“You should have told me.” For some reason, it was the only thing I could think about. “Do you know how many times I’ve tried to have sex with you, and you could have easily told me?”

“Yes!” she cried. “Yes, I know. I know. I’m sorry, Grant.”

I couldn’t believe we were arguing about this. I couldn’t believe this was happening. I should have been fucking ecstatic that Ari wanted to have sex with me and that she was being honest with me. It fucking meant that I could have her just like I’d been wanting since day one. But I kept pushing that thought away, and instead, I focused on the fact that I would have to start from square one.

It would be awkward, uncomfortable, and even painful for her. Would she cry? Would I hurt her? Christ¸ I’d never once cared enough about a girl to wonder if I was going to hurt her.

“I feel like an idiot…like I should have known.”

“What? Should I have had virgin stamped on my forehead or something?”

I could tell she was getting irritated, but I couldn’t get a grasp on it.

“Get it fucking tattooed to your forehead. That would have been a better indicator.”

“Well, sorry!” she snapped. “I didn’t think I’d be in this condition forever.”

“How have you been in this condition for this long?”

“I’m nineteen!”

“I had sex at fifteen!”

“I’m not a whore!” she screamed back in my face.

“Babe, please, I prefer manwhore.”

She angrily ground her teeth together. “You’re such an asshole.”

I couldn’t keep it together. I was fucking it all up, but I couldn’t stop. Would I have continued to pursue her? In the beginning, no. After I’d gotten to know her…I didn’t know.

Yes.

I hadn’t lied when I said Ari made me stop feeling. She made me stop feeling the pain. She helped push back the memories. She helped focus me. Fuck, she makes me a better person. And I thought, in turn, I fucking made her a better person. She might be perfect on the outside, but I’d expanded her universe.

I wanted to tell her all of this, to drop down to my knees in the sand and let her know everything I was feeling. Instead, I just stood there, letting my frustration get the better of me.

“And you know what? Since you’re so set on being a manwhore,” she spat the word back at me, “it’s probably in my best interest not to sleep with you. It’s not like this is anything like a relationship. I’m sure you’ve been fucking everything that walks when we haven’t been together anyway!”

I fucking exploded. I couldn’t let her think that. “Ari, I haven’t been with anyone else since the day we fucking met!”

“What?” she asked, stunned.

“Yeah. You ruined me.”

“But you were gone for a week, and the guys made it seem like—”

“I lied!” I blubbered on. “I fucking lied to them. I’ve been lying to them since we met because I didn’t want to look like a pussy.”

She stared at me in shock. “You really haven’t been with anyone else…since September?”

“Damn, Ari, I’m not going to lie to you. I’ve wanted to get laid something fierce. Blue balls and I have gotten comfortable together. I haven’t gone this long without sex since…ever.”

“Well, that’s reassuring.”

I let the words tumble out of my mouth—everything I’d been holding back, everything I should have said to begin with instead of fucking freaking out on her for being a virgin.

“But that’s the thing. Virgin or not, I’ve waited this long for you. I can keep waiting for you.”

“Grant…” she said, releasing some of her anger with a sigh.

“I’m not going to fuck it up, Ari. I’m no fucking good at this. I’ve never done this before. I’ve never been a…boyfriend. But ever since the first time we met, I haven’t been able to get you out of my head, and I’m not about to start now.”

“Grant McDermott, did you just call yourself my boyfriend?” Ari whispered.

I tugged the dog tags over my head and then closed the distance between us. “Princess, you haven’t figured that out by now?”

She took in a deep shuddering breath. “I didn’t want to assume anything.”

“Assume away.”

I placed the dog tags around her neck. She fingered them loosely in her hand. Her mouth was open slightly in surprise.

“Now, everyone else will, too.”

“Where the hell did you go this morning?” Cheyenne asked when I finally made it back to my place.

I still had an hour before my first class, but I knew there was no way I would be going back to sleep.

“Uh…” The words stalled on my tongue. I’d been so secretive about everything with Grant up until this point that it felt strange to be able to just freely divulge what had happened. It was kind of…exciting. “Grant picked me up.”

“At five in the morning?”

“He drove us down the shore, and we watched the sunrise.”

Cheyenne just stood there with her eyes narrowed. Her fiery red curls had been tamed, but she still always had this slightly manic appearance. Maybe it was just because I knew she was crazy.

“Grant McDermott?”

At that moment, Gabi walked in with a yawn. “Why are you guys so loud? Wasn’t the five a.m. wake-up call enough?”

“Aribel is trying to tell me that Grant McDermott picked her up at five o’clock in the morning just to drive her down the shore to see the sunrise.”

“That’s so romantic!” Gabi gushed.

“It sounds like bullshit to me. That doesn’t sound like Grant at all.”

“Well, I’ve never been particularly romantic, so I don’t think I’d make it up,” I told her flatly.

“Cheyenne, the yelling,” Shelby called, stumbling into the living room and collapsing on the couch.

“Did you hear?”

“How could I not?” Shelby grumbled.

I crossed my arms and waited for them to shut up. I knew it had been completely unlike Grant to do anything like that. He had been the first person to admit that, but it had still happened. “Are you through?” I asked, cutting off whatever Cheyenne was about to say to Shelby.

“Wait, you’re serious?”

“Pretty serious.” I held up the dog tags still hanging around my neck. “I’d say he’s my boyfriend.”

All three girls went silent, their eyes fixed on the dog tags. I was pretty sure I’d just shocked the shit out of them. Then again, the entire thing had surprised me. I definitely hadn’t thought that this would happen after almost having sex, admitting I was a virgin, and then arguing about it almost to the point of no return.

Grant McDermott is my boyfriend. I had to mull it over for a bit to get used to that thought.

“You’re dating Grant McDermott?” Gabi said to break the silence.

“Um…yeah. Well, we’ve been dating since September, but I guess it’s official now.” I shrugged.

Cheyenne blinked away her shock. “Girl, I’m excited for you. I’m just…wow. How did this happen?”

“We almost had sex.”

“You haven’t had sex?” Cheyenne gasped.

“Cheyenne,” I said, rolling my eyes.

“To her credit, Aribel,” Shelby said, “it has been months. Grant isn’t known to keep it in his pants for more than a few hours.”

“He hasn’t been with anyone else since we started talking.”

The disbelieving stares I received were enough to make my stomach flop. He wouldn’t lie to me about that, would he?

Cheyenne glanced at the other girls and then back at me. “I don’t want to be a Debbie Downer or anything. If Grant is your boyfriend and you want it, then I’m ecstatic…”

“But?”

“But he does have a reputation, Aribel.”

Shelby jumped in, “We just don’t want to see you get hurt.”

Well, this is going great. “I know his reputation, considering I was the only one in this household who didn’t fall head over heels every time he walked into the room. Maybe you remember that the first time I met him, I drugged him to try to get him to stay away from me. You were the ones pushing me toward him. I know you don’t want me to get hurt, but you can’t just get all concerned BFF when it actually works out.”

Cheyenne sighed. “Well, I just have one question.”

“What?”

“Does this mean I get to see more of Vin?”

We all broke down into giggles.

“Yes, I’m sure it means that.”

We spent the rest of the time talking about the upcoming ski trip. I was really ready to just get through finals so that we could get away. I loved school, and I worked hard, but I’d never really had something like this to look forward to. I always just jetted off back to Boston to see my family.

Cheyenne, of course, was making it a much bigger event than just the four of us traveling up to the Poconos with Grant and the band. From the sounds of it, she had invited everyone that she knew whether they liked ContraBand’s music or not. I didn’t really care as long as Grant and the girls were going to be there.