Jamie Begley - Tainted

“You went through my things?” Whoa. How did this get turned around on her; she was the one that was angry.

“I didn’t mean to. I was looking for a drawer and one of the pictures slid out,” Sawyer explained.

“Did all the pictures fall out?”

Damn it, Sawyer thought.

“No.”

“Those pictures were taken six years ago. You’re going to be angry for something I did six years ago?”

“Yes—no. You’re trying to confuse me,” she said, frustrated at his refusal to see that he was the one in the wrong.

“I’m not trying to confuse you. I have news for you, Sawyer; I wasn’t a virgin when I met you. I’ve led a very active sex life. In fact, there’s not much I haven’t done.”

“From those pictures, I know there’s nothing you haven’t done,” Sawyer snapped, jerking off his lap. She went to the drawer, taking the envelope out. She opened it and dumped the photos on the bed.

Sawyer pointed at one. “I wasn’t the first one you talked into getting her nipples pierced, was I?” She was hurt and angry at herself. She had felt special because she had wanted to have them pierced to please him. When she looked at the picture with Tatiana, it didn’t feel special to her anymore.

Kaden reached out, pulling her stiff body between his thighs.

“Tatiana’s nipples had been pierced before I even started dating her. A couple of women I’ve been in sexual relationships with have them, plus a variety of other piercings. Some have had their tongue or lips pierced. A couple their pussies. I didn’t try to talk you into those, did I?”

“No,” she admitted reluctantly. Damn, she wasn’t ready to be talked out of her madness.

“Sawyer, there is no comparison between you and Tatiana.”

“I—I know.” Her lip trembled.

Kaden’s hand splayed the pictures onto the bed. “Look at my face.”

Sawyer looked at the photos on the bed, this time looking at his face. The Kaden in those pictures was not the one in this room with her. The Kaden in the picture’s face was filled with lust. He was also obviously drugged, the photo catching the glazed look in his eyes. The man in those pictures didn’t look at Tatiana the way he looked at her when he made love to her. Sawyer felt a lump in her throat. The way he was staring at her now. The Kaden in the photos had died with his family.

“I’m sorry.” Her arms went around his shoulders, her mouth going to his. “I’m so sorry.” Kaden’s arms pulled her back onto his lap.

“I love you, Sawyer.”

“I love you, too, Kaden.”

“I have to get back to the interviews. They all probably think I’m back into drugs again the way I took off.”

“Go ahead. I’ll see you later.” His hand cupped her jaw, bringing her eyes to his. “You can destroy those pictures and tapes if you get bored,” he said, standing up.

Going to the door, he was about to open it, but he turned back.

“Oh, and Sawyer, you will be punished tonight.” He raised a finger for each of her offenses. “You were rude to Ax when he asked where you were going. You were very rude to me when I asked. You went through my personal items, but the one that will really hurt and the one you will never forget, is that you were going to leave without talking to me first.”

Kaden then opened the door and closed it behind him.

My love for you consumes me, drowns me.

Baby, why can’t you see, you’re mine for eternity.

Like a bird in a cage with nowhere to go,

These tainted hands hold your soul.

I will make you love me, crave me.

Baby, just you wait and see. I will become your disease.

Like a bird in a cage with nowhere to go,

These tainted hands hold your soul.

You flew away. You didn’t stay.

Baby, why didn’t I see, you could be stolen from me.

I’m like a bird in a cage with nowhere to go,

These tainted hands need your soul.

You came back. My heart was black.

Baby, look and see. You have finally rescued me.

Like a bird in a cage with nowhere to go,

These tainted hands won your soul.

Sawyer watched Kaden sing from backstage with Alec standing next to her. Kaden had his shirt off and was wearing leather pants that hung low on his hips. The music was erotic as hell and was thrumming through her body. The sultry lyrics combined with his voice had the audience swaying, holding lights in their hands. The song was moving with an emotional depth that she hadn’t heard before.

“Is it a new song? I haven’t heard it before.” Sawyer turned, asking Ax who was standing behind her.

“Yeah, he started writing it when you were missing. He just finished it a couple of days ago,” Ax answered.

Sawyer looked back at the stage, seeing Kaden’s eyes were on her. She gave him a sweet smile, loving the song and the man who’d written the lyrics.

When the song ended, another began. Sawyer should have known the touching moment couldn’t last. The familiar chords of the song started as Alyce strutted out onto the stage. Kaden and her sang, walking back and forth across the stage. When it came time to do their usual bump and grind on the middle of the stage, Kaden made a turn, walking back to the side of the stage toward her. When he didn’t stop, but took her hand and led her out onto the stage, she tried to pull away, embarrassed with the arena’s eyes on her. Alyce looked furious; however, she moved to the right of the stage and kept singing while Kaden moved them toward the center before coming to a stop.

Sawyer was frozen stiff at being the focus of attention. She turned to flee the stage, but Kaden’s arm went around her waist, holding her in place. Her eyes flew wildly to his, scared to death. She had been kidnapped twice, been beaten by Digger, had bullets shot around her twice, yet standing on stage terrified her.

“Dance with me.” The look in Kaden’s eyes had her struggles slowing as Kaden’s movements against her began to cross the barrier of her stage fright. His hands went to her hips as he continued to sing into his headset.

She gradually relaxed against him, forcing herself to look only at him as she began to move against him. The music she had watched him dance numerous times to with Alyce was easy to move to; however, she couldn’t let herself go to the extent that Alyce did. When the song ended, he let her flee the stage back to Alec and Ax’s side, who were laughing at her like goons.

“I—I’m g—going t—to k—k—kill h—him.” Her comment only made them laugh louder at the same time that Ax’s good arm went around her shoulder, drawing her to his side.

After the show, they returned to the VIP room. Kaden had gone to the airport that afternoon to meet Jesse’s plane. Then, before the show, the promoters had kept them busy, so it was the first opportunity she’d had to meet Jesse. He was good looking and sexy, but in her eyes, he paled in comparison to Kaden.

Several of the women fans were overwhelmed backstage, unable to restrain themselves and had to be shown out by Alec.

Sawyer sat on one of the couches, watching as Sin, D-mon and Jesse ushered one star struck fan into the restroom. Sawyer could only imagine how wild the group had been when they were younger, if they were like this now that they were older. They showed no signs of slowing down, either.

Ax took a seat next to her on the couch, wincing as he jarred his shoulder.

Sawyer got up, going to get him a beer before bringing it back to him.

“Thanks,” he said with a pained smile.

“You’re welcome.”

“You and Kaden kiss and make up?”

“Yes, we’re okay.”

“That’s good. I don’t think he would make it losing another person he loves, Sawyer.”

Sawyer lowered her head, feeling guilty that she would have walked out on Kaden with no explanation.

“I have a little bit of a temper,” Sawyer confessed.

Ax shook his head at her ruefully. “I think Kaden will help you get it under control. It’s a good thing for you that we’re spending the night on the bus and don’t have any privacy, but Kaden’s promised me a weekend visit when you two find a home. You really shouldn’t have been so rude to me this morning when I asked where you were going. I had to take another pain pill after I locked you up.” His twinkling eyes promised retribution. Her body clenched and her nipples pebbled under her shirt.

Kaden sat down next to her, his hand pressing down on her thigh, preventing her from getting up from the couch.

“Behave, Ax. I can’t tell if you’re scaring her or turning her on,” Kaden said, searching Sawyer’s red face.

“Both,” Ax answered for her. Both men sat on the couch with her, talking about the show. Kaden was letting Jesse handle the press and promoters.

Later, Alec escorted them through the remaining crowd as they left the arena back onto the bus. The men were tired but pumped, throwing themselves down on the chairs and couches and pulling out the liquor bottles. Sawyer knew when it was time to retreat.

She went into the bedroom, preparing for bed. She was about to take a shower when Kaden walked in, closing and locking the door behind him.

His eyes took in the nightgown in her hand.

“You’re not going to need that tonight, Sawyer.” Sawyer paused, looking at his hard face. “Take off your clothes and prepare yourself while I take my shower.” She swallowed hard, aware he was not going to let her get away with her behavior from earlier today.