She did look, and what she saw was painful. Her eyes opened wide, and the veil lifted away. Serena's fantasy was real. She and Damon weren't playacting. He loved her, and she loved him. How much more powerful, how much more sexy did it make the scene playing out before her?

For the first time she understood Serena's struggle, her fear that her love for Damon was rooted in make-believe. But for anyone watching the reverence in Damon's actions, there was no mistaking the reality of his feelings for Serena.

Julie's own romp between the sheets seemed such a farce now. Nothing like this beautiful display of love and devotion. Julie was hiding behind her blindfold just as surely as Serena was standing in the sun, letting the world see who it was she belonged to.

The power of her revelation weakened her. Hiding. For a woman who prided herself on taking the world by the nuts, this was hard to swallow. Coward. She winced at the word.

"I can't do this again," she said in a low voice.

Cole cocked his head to the side, his blue eyes curious. "Does it upset you so much to see Serena worshipped by the man she loves?"

Julie laughed huskily, ashamed of the tears that swelled in her throat. Worshipped. What an apt word. That's precisely what Damon was doing.

"No, not now that you've explained it. Now that I've seen it and understand. She's very lucky."

The wistfulness in her voice made her cringe, but calling it back would have been impossible when every piece of her yearned to be looked at like Damon looked at Serena.

"What is it you can't do then?"

She met his gaze and wondered if he would ever look at her the way Damon saw Serena. No, he wanted her. Even desired her. But he didn't see her. And now it seemed so important that a man look at her with everything in his eyes.

God, she was losing her mind. She didn't want a relationship. She didn't want promises of forever. Words were so damn cheap. But she wanted that look. She would die for that look and never ask for anything else.

'I've been playing games," she said ruefully. "It's what I do best."

Cole moved closer, touching her cheek with gentle fingers.

"There's nothing wrong with games, Julie. Not everything has to be about love and commitment."

She laughed. "Two hours ago that would have been music to my ears. Who knows, maybe when I wake up in the morning and kick my ass around a bit, it'll sound wonderful again. But tonight ..." She sighed. "Will you do me a favor and let Damon know that I won't be back? I'll call and thank him later. He's truly the best. Serena is one lucky bitch."

Her gaze went back to the center of the room to see Damon's hands gliding over the marks on Serena's skin. His lips followed a similar path. She swallowed against a dry tongue when Damon unfastened his pants and moved behind Serena. God, he was going to make love to her in front of everyone else.

Cole remained silent next to her as they watched. There was no discomfort evident to Serena or Damon. No, they were focused solely on each other. The rest of the world didn't exist for them.

Serena arched against her bonds as Damon grasped her hips and guided his erect cock into her depths. Julie tried to look away. She shouldn't be watching. This was her friend. Their lovemaking should be a private matter. But she couldn't tear herself away from the beauty of the two people allowing their love to shine over the entire room.

A knot formed in her throat. Tears shimmered in her vision. Never had she been so affected by sex. But no, this wasn't just sex. Sex was a paltry word to describe what was before her. Beautiful. Magnificent. Soul stirring. As long as she lived, Julie would never forget this night and what seeing Damon and Serena had done to her on a primitive level. Later she would marvel at how much they had changed her outlook, her own desires and needs.

Damon held Serena, lifting her so that her weight wasn't born by the ropes securing her wrists to the wooden beam. His movements weren't entirely gentle, in fact he made love to her almost brutally, and yet his love for her was so obvious in each touch, the gentle caresses intermixed with the savagery of his thrusts.

The combination aroused Julie. A hot flush pooled in her belly and spread outward until her face flamed. Her nipples thrust outward, beading and straining. Hot, kinky sex was something she'd fantasized about, something she'd gone to great lengths to make happen, and it had been good, but how much better would it be to have a man make love to you with absolute devotion, to know he loved you more than life itself?

She shook her head mutely as if by doing so she could deny that she wanted—no, needed—such a thing from a man.

Damon lowered his head to press a kiss to the middle of her back. Such a simple gesture and yet Julie felt that kiss to her soul. Never again would she poke fun at Serena for her relationship choices. How could she, when Serena held in her hand something that Julie could never hope to find? Who was better off? Julie who flitted from stranger to stranger to avoid messy emotional entanglements or Serena who was loved and cherished to her very core?

He continued to thrust against Serena's hips, their bodies shaking with the force of his entry. And then he pulled away, his cock bobbing as it came free. He closed his hand around the base and jerked up and down, aiming at Serena's skin.

Julie watched in absorbed fascination as jets of Damon's semen erupted, splashing onto Serena's back, vivid against the rosy blush of the welts.

"He's marking her," Julie whispered in surprised realization.

Dear God, how primitive. How abso-freaking-lutely hot. What the hell was wrong with her that she went positively liquid inside at the idea of being marked by a man?

"Yes, he is," Cole said quietly. "He's showing the world that she's his, that she belongs to him. The marks from the crop are his. Her body is his. He comes on her to honor her. What might seem insulting to others, demeaning even, is hardly that to Damon."

Cole was right. Under any other circumstances, her feminine sensibilities would be screaming in outrage. Damon's public marking would be seen by many to be degrading, like Serena was some nameless, faceless object of his lust.

But all Julie could think was how beautiful and poignant the scene before her was. How sexy it was for this man to proclaim publicly that he loved this woman. Damon didn't know it yet, but he'd just gained a staunch ally in Julie. Never again would she question whether he was right for Serena.

"I should go," she said. "I don't want Serena to see me. It might make her uncomfortable. I feel like an intruder here, like I snuck over a no trespassing sign to watch a sunrise on a private beach."

"I know what you mean. The first time I saw Serena was here, Damon asked me to prepare her. Touching her . . ."

"You touched her?" Julie asked sharply.

He raised an eyebrow. "Yes, much like I touched you. Does that bother you?"

She shook her head. "No, it just seems you have the worst job. Look but don't touch, or rather, don't touch too much. Tell me, is that all you do here? Prepare women to be another man's pleasure for the evening?"

Cole looked startled by her question. A rueful awareness settled into his eyes. "This isn't my job. I mean, I don't draw a salary here. I'm not comfortable with that thought. Damon trusts me. I was honored by his request to ready Serena, and then you."

"So you do have your share of women here," she drawled.

Slowly he shook his head. "No, I wouldn't say that either. I'm rather discerning, or so I'd like to think. I see a lot of beautiful women. Beautiful, willing women."

"Then what's the problem?" she asked softly. "Why do you have the look of a man who's very much alone?"

His smile looked more like a grimace. "Why do you have the look of a woman who's very much alone after a night with the sexual attentions of two men?"

"Touché. I'll take that as my cue to mind my own business," she said with a grin.

He wrinkled his nose. "I apologize if that's the way you took it. I get rather defensive when I feel I'm cornered."

"Don't we all?" She looked back to where Damon was carefully untying Serena. The rest of the room was slowly going their own way again. "I need to go. Thanks, Cole. For everything. I mean that. Tonight was ... eye-opening."

He reached down for her hand and squeezed. "You're welcome. It was my pleasure. Are you sure you won't be back? Even to see me?"

She smiled a little sadly. "Last week I would have not only taken you up on that offer, but I would have taken you into one of these rooms and done my best to make you forget every other woman you've ever had or hope to have in the future."

"And why not now?" he asked with a sparkle of amusement.

She glanced back one more time to where Damon and Serena stood. "Because now I want someone to look at me the way he looks at her." She looked back at Cole whose wry look told her he understood exactly what she was saying. "You want me. You find me attractive, but you'll never look at me that way and we both know it."

"Does it make any difference for me to tell you that if I could look at any woman that way, I'd want it to be you?"

She laid her palm against his cheek. "You're very sweet, Cole. And you'll look at her that way. One day."

He caught her hand when she would have pulled it away and kissed her open palm. "It was truly my pleasure to look after you these two nights, Julie. If there is ever anything you want or need, you have only to contact me. I'll see to it you get it."