Staring at the sheet music, I could barely make out the chords. “I should go back and check on Abby and the twins. I’m sure Eli could do it with you.”

Eli snorted. “Oh yeah, it’d be a dream come true to duet with Jake.”

Jake shook his head. “That’s so not happening.” Taking me by the shoulders, Jake led me over to the piano and urged me down onto the bench. “Come on, Allie-Bean. Help your big brother out.”

A resigned and painful sigh rushed from my lips. Even though I wanted to run away, I was stuck in this nightmare. At the sound of a voice behind me, my eyes snapped shut in pain.

“Uh, how much longer until our rehearsal?” Rhys asked.

“It’s gonna be awhile. Abby’s putting the twins down for a nap. But I’m going to make the most of the time by working on that fucking duet the label wants us to do.”

“With Allison?” Rhys asked.

Jake chuckled. “Yeah, why not?”

Glancing at him over my shoulder, I watched him shrug while giving me a shy smile. “Just surprised, that’s all.”

Focusing my eyes on the sheet music, I then reached out my shaky fingers to the piano keys. I began playing the melancholy chords. They echoed loudly through the practically silent auditorium. Jake came in with his part, “Say something, I'm giving up on you. I'll be the one, if you want me to…” The deep bravado of his voice echoed through my mind, momentarily making me forget about Rhys. I never tired of hearing Jake sing. As a child, it was a source of comfort to me when I was sick or hurt. But there was no comfort now—this wasn’t a wound or an ailment he could fix by singing.

Just as it came time for me to sing, I felt Rhys’s presence looming over me. He began to walk slowly around to the front of the piano. With my voice harmonizing with Jake’s, I refused to look up at Rhys even though I could feel his heated gaze singeing my cheeks. Instead, I focused on the black and white keys, noting the irony that there was nothing black and white about what had happened between us. It was the gray area that kept causing us so much grief and pain.

After singing a few more lines, I glanced up from the piano to meet Rhys’s intense gaze. I knew what line was coming, and since it meant something for me, I wanted it to mean something for him, too. As I held his stare, I sang the line directly to him because in so many ways it was the ugly truth. “You're the one that I love, and I'm saying goodbye.” And I was saying goodbye. There was no way around it—no other way to claw myself out of the suffocating pain that overwhelmed me than to say goodbye.

An expression of pure agony stretched across his face. It caused an ache in my chest so harsh that I had to look away from him. With my tears blurring the music to where I could no longer read it, I shot up off the piano bench. It clattered noisily to the floor. When I turned around, Jake stared at me in surprise. “I’m sorry. I can’t,” I whispered, before running past him into the wings.

I could hear both Jake and Rhys calling my name, but I ignored them. Instead, I just kept running until I got to the Runaway Train dressing room. After slamming myself inside, I stumbled over to the makeup table. The pain cut through me again, causing me to cry out. I doubled over at the waist. I would’ve collapsed onto the floor if I hadn’t gripped onto the sides of the table.

As I glanced up to gaze at my broken self in the mirror, I knew I had no other choice. I had to escape the torment. I had to get away from Rhys.

I was leaving.


Chapter Sixteen

Rhys

When I had finally gotten back to the hotel, Allison had already left for the arena with Jake and Abby. I didn’t wait for the car to take me. After hailing a cab, I headed for the arena. When I got there, I searched everywhere inside for her, but I couldn’t find her. With a ‘Do Not Disturb’ sign on the Runaway Train dressing room, I imagined she was inside with the twins.

With a defeated sigh, I made my way to the stage. I found Gabe and Eli sitting around on the stage while Jake stood at the piano. Then my stomach did a pansy little flip-flop at the sight of Allison seated at the piano bench. Trying not to let my emotions show in front of everyone, I quickly asked about when we were rehearsing. It wasn’t too surprising that rehearsal had been delayed for the twins’ naptime. But instead of having the opportunity to talk to Allison like I wanted, it was fucking frustrating that Jake had her working with him on some duet.

From the moment her fingers started floating over the black and white keys, her talent once again transfixed me. But once I realized what the song was, I felt an ache burning itself through my chest. I wasn’t too emotionally dense to realize the significance of the lyrics. If there was one song that epitomized our relationship, it was this song.

When Allison began to sing with Jake, the wildfire raged stronger in my chest. I desperately needed to see her face, so I began to slowly walk around the edges of the baby grand piano. When her face came into my line of sight, I closed my eyes in pain. Her expression read the agony she was feeling. It appeared she was trying to keep her emotions in check with every fiber of her being. Silently, I willed her to look up from the keys—to look into my eyes and see that all was not lost between us.

But when she did, it drove the knife even deeper into my chest. Staring straight at me, she sang, “You’re the one that I love, and I’m saying goodbye.”

When I started around the piano for her, the keys banged as she bolted from the bench, sending it crashing onto the stage floor. The next thing I knew she was sprinting away into the wings.

“Allison, wait!” Jake called, at the same time I shouted, “Allison!” When she continued running, he whirled around and pinned Eli with a death glare. “What the fuck have you done?” he demanded, his fists clenched at his sides.

Eli’s eyes widened as his face paled considerably. “Nothing, Jake. I swear.”

“Then why the hell did she just run out of here like that?”

Glancing from Jake to me, Eli shrugged. “I sure as hell don’t know, but I do know everything is good between us.”

With a gutted feeling, I turned and ran off stage. I started peeking in each and every one of the empty rooms. All the doors were open except two. I paused only momentarily at the Runaway Train dressing room before I flung open the door. Allison was bent over the makeup table across the room from me.

At the sound of someone behind her, Allison jerked her head up. An odd sense of déjà vu came over me as I met her gaze in the mirror, like a sickening repeat of last night. “Please leave me alone.”

I remained standing exactly where I was, my chest rising and falling with heavy breaths. Allison smacked her hands on the table. “If you have any decency left, you’ll walk out of here right now.”

My head jerked back like she had slapped me. I don’t think I had ever seen her so visibly angry. While extremely passionate, she was usually able to keep her emotions in check. Fuck, I had so screwed up. Unable to form the right words, I mumbled a weak, “I’m sorry.”

She gave a mirthless laugh. “I’m so fucking tired of you saying that.” Shaking her head at me, she said, “I can’t do this anymore. Tonight after the show, I’m leaving on the first flight out of here.”

Her words had the same effect as if she had punched me in the gut. Gut-wrenching pain caused me momentarily to double at the waist. I struggled to breathe so that I could find the words necessary to make her stay. “No, you can’t do that,” I argued. I closed my eyes as the agony washed over me. “Please.”

“If I stay here one minute longer with you with the way things are between us, I’m going to go crazy.”

Extreme panic crept along my spine. This was sure as hell not what I had envisioned happening when it came time to beg for Allison’s forgiveness. I started grasping at straws—anything to earn Allison’s forgiveness. “What about the internship? You can’t just walk away from the opportunity—it means too much.”

“I’ve completed most of the field work, and I can finish the designs and clothes at home. I’m sure Miriam would work with me over Skype.”

I felt myself drowning even more in the quicksand of panic about her leaving. “But what about the twins? As much as you love them, you’re just going to leave?”

Tears streaked down Allison’s face. “I love them more than anything in the world, but right now, I have to love myself more.”

I shook my head back and forth. “No, you can’t do this. I won’t let you.”

Her dark eyes narrowed at me. “Here’s a newsflash, Rhys. You don’t get to tell me what to do. Since you’re not my boyfriend, let alone a true friend, you don’t even get to suggest anything for me to do. In the vast scheme of things, you don’t matter at all. You’re just the heartless bastard who broke my heart.”

Her words cut through my chest to pierce my soul. “Allison, please believe me when I say that I’m so fucking sorry. If I could take it all back, I would.”

“No, you’re not. You say those words because they’re easy, but your actions? They’ll just keep on torturing me.”

When she started to brush past me to make it to the door, I reached out for her. “Please, Allison, let me make it right,” I said.

“Don’t touch me!” she cried, slapping my hands away.

I hung my head in shame. “I did this to you. I caused you this pain, and I have to make it right. I’m sorry. Please, please, let me make it up to you. Please…don’t go.”

Burying her face in her hands, Allison said, “Rhys, I meant it. Leave. Now!”