The low to follow the high began far sooner than she had expected, though.
The Earl of Edgecombe did not need a carriage to take him back home as his house on
Brock Street
was very close. And since there was such a press of carriages about the Upper Rooms, Viscount Sinclair had directed his own to wait outside the house. Frances strolled back there with Amy, the girl’s arm linked through her own, while the two gentlemen came some distance behind.
“I have never had a more wonderful time in my life,” Amy said with a heartfelt sigh as they walked down onto the Circus. “Have you, Miss Allard?”
“Indeed,” Frances said, “I do not believe I have.”
“Everyone wanted to dance with me,” the girl said naively. “And with you too. You did not miss a single set, did you? I was delighted to see Luce dancing with you a second time. He drives Mama to distraction because he never dances.”
“Then I must consider myself honored,” Frances said.
“Of course,” Amy continued, “he will have to dance any number of times this Season, I daresay. He promised Grandpapa at Christmas that he would take a bride this year, and I suppose she will be Miss Hunt, who has been waiting for him forever. She is in town already with her mama and papa and the Marquess of Godsworthy, her grandfather, a particular friend of my grandpapa. But I will not be able to dance again until next year, when I am to make my come-out. It is most provoking.”
Frances’s heart was hammering against her ribs. She had very sensibly sent him on his way after Christmas, and she certainly had not been foolish enough during the last few days to expect any renewal of his attentions. She did not want their renewal. But of course knowing that he was about to marry, that he had already chosen his bride, in fact, did hurt. Quite unreasonably so. But then reason had nothing to say to affairs of the heart. She had once spent the night with him. He was the only man with whom she had had sexual relations. It was understandable, then, that she should feel hurt—or if not hurt, then . . . depressed.
“Having to wait for something one desires greatly is provoking,” Frances said. “But your come-out will be glorious when the time finally comes, and it will be even more so because you have waited so long. But those are sensible words you have doubtless heard a dozen times. In your place, I would be very inclined to throw a noisy tantrum.”
Amy laughed with delight and squeezed her arm.
“Oh, I do like you,” she said. “And when I return to Bath—though I do not know when that will be—I shall write and tell you so and come to the school to see you. I wish we did not have to leave Bath so soon as I feel just like a grown-up here, away from my sisters. But Luce says we must return to London tomorrow or the next day.”
Ah! Another blow. Though in reality it was no such thing, of course. She must not make any grand tragedy out of the events of the past four days. She had not expected to see any of them after tonight—at least, with her intellect she had not expected it.
“I shall look forward to seeing you again at some time in the future, then,” Frances said as they came to a stop outside the house on
Brock Street
. Viscount Sinclair’s carriage waited there, Peters up on the box. She wondered if she could suggest riding alone back to the school, but she knew it would not be allowed. Besides . . .
Well, besides, she could not deprive herself of the last few minutes of agony in his company, could she?
Agony?
What sentimental drivel!
She drew her borrowed shawl more tightly about her shoulders. It was still only springtime and the air was cool.
Amy hugged her as the gentlemen came up to them. The earl held out his right hand and, when Frances set her own in it, covered it with his other hand.
“Miss Allard,” he said, “I thank you most sincerely for coming with us tonight. Your company has meant a great deal to Amy, I know. I will be going to London with my grandchildren within the next day or two. But when I return, I shall invite you to sing for me. I hope you will agree to do it.”
“I would be delighted, my lord,” she said.
“Lucius will take you home now,” he said. “Good night, Miss Allard.”
“Good night, my lord,” she said. “Good night, Amy.”
She was back inside the carriage with Viscount Sinclair again a minute later, and it was proceeding on its way. The journey would take ten minutes, she estimated. She had ten minutes left.
How foolish to feel panic at the thought.
“Tell me you enjoyed yourself tonight,” he said abruptly after the first minute or so had passed in silence.
“Oh, I did,” she assured him. “It was very—”
“If you say pleasant,” he said, “I shall throttle you, Frances.”
“—delightful,” she said, and smiled in the darkness.
“Tell me you found it delightful because I was there,” he said. “Tell me you would not have enjoyed it nearly as much if I had not been.”
The inside of the carriage was very dark. She could not see his face when she turned her head to look at him.
“I will tell you no such thing,” she said indignantly. “The very idea! The arrogance of it! Of course I would have enjoyed the evening just as much—better!—if you had not been there.”
“Liar!” he said softly.
“You appear to be under the delusion, Lord Sinclair,” she said, “that you are God’s gift to women.”
“A cliché unworthy of you,” he said. “Tell me you have regretted rejecting me after Christmas.”
“I have not!” she cried.
“Not even one tiny little bit?” he asked.
“Not even half that much,” she said.
“A quarter, then?” He laughed softly. “You are a terrible liar, Frances.”
“And you,” she said, “are more conceited than any man I have ever met in my life.”
“Is it conceited of me,” he asked her, “to have met someone and felt an overwhelming attraction to her, to have felt her equal attraction to me, to have consummated that attraction, and then to believe that she must have felt some twinge of regret at saying good-bye to me, especially when she did not need to do so?”
“It was better to suffer that little twinge,” she said tartly, “than to become your mistress.”
“Aha!” he said. “So you do admit to some twinge, do you?”
She bit her lip but did not answer him.
“I never did say that making you my mistress was my intention,” he said.
“But you would not say that your intention was marriage either,” she said. “Pardon me, Lord Sinclair, but I am unaware of any other relationship that would have been possible between us if I had gone away with you.”
“Courtship?” he suggested. “We needed more time together, Frances. We were not nearly finished with each other.”
“You speak from the perspective of the idle rich,” she said. “I need to work for my living. And my work is here.”
“I offered to stay here,” he reminded her, “but you would have none of it. And I offered to take you to London with me and find you somewhere to live and some decent female to stay with you for respectability.”
“And you would have paid all the expenses, I suppose,” she said.
“Yes, of course.” She knew from the tone of his voice that his eyebrows had arched arrogantly above his eyes.
“I would have been a kept woman,” she cried. “Can you not see that? I would have been your mistress no matter what other name you might have attempted to put upon our connection.”
“Lord!” he exclaimed. “You would argue that black is white, Frances, if I dared to suggest otherwise. But arguing gives me a headache, and I avoid headaches at all costs. There is no discussing any matter sensibly with you, is there? You must always have the last word.”
She turned toward him again to make some retort, but he turned to her first, set one arm about her shoulders, held her chin firm with the other hand, and kissed her hard on the mouth.
The shock of it caused her mind to shatter into incoherence.
“Mmm.” Her hand came up to his shoulder to push him away.
“Don’t fight me,” he murmured fiercely against her lips. “Don’t fight me, Frances.”
And because his very touch had destroyed all rational thought processes for the moment, she gave up her instinctive resistance to his embrace. She slid her fingers up into his hair instead and kissed him back with all the ardor she had been suppressing for three long months.
He parted her lips with his own, and his tongue came deep into her mouth, filling her with warmth and longing and raw need. For a while she gave in to pure sensation and turned in order to set both arms about him and press her bosom to his chest.
Ah, it had been so long.
It had been forever.
She had missed him so much.
His hands roamed over her and then strained her to him.
But powerful as physical passion could be, it could not entirely obliterate thought for longer than a few moments. She was not free to give in to his ardor as she had been after Christmas because she knew that he was not free. He had promised to marry, and he was going to London tomorrow or the next day to do just that. Actually, he had made that promise even before he met her in the snowstorm.
That realization caused her stomach to somersault.
She lowered her hand and pushed against his shoulder.
“No!” she said against his lips.
“Damn it, Frances,” he said, lifting his head a few inches from hers. “Goddamn it all to hell!”
She did not reprove him for the shockingly blasphemous language. She bit her lip instead and blinked her eyes in the darkness so that she would not openly weep.
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