“Oh, ahm… OK,” says Tarquin, a little stiltedly. “Morning, Becky.”

“Morning!” I say. “Nice to… to see you. Nice… jumper.”

There’s a frozen silence in the kitchen as he walks out, which remains until we hear the front door slam. Then, very slowly, I turn to face Suze.

“Suze…”

I don’t even know how to begin.

“Suze… that was Tarquin.”

“Yes, I know,” she says, studying the kitchen counter intently.

“Suze… are you and Tarquin—”

“No!” she exclaims, as though she’s been scalded. “No, of course not! It’s just… we just…” She stops.

“You just…” I say encouragingly.

“Once or twice…”

There’s a long pause.

“With Tarquin,” I say, just to make sure.

“Yes,” she says.

“Right,” I say, nodding my head as though this is a completely reasonable scenario. But my mouth is twitching and I can feel a strange pressure rising inside me — half shock, half hysterical laughter. I mean, Tarquin. Tarquin!

A sudden giggle escapes from me and I clamp my hand over my mouth.

“Don’t laugh!” wails Suze. “I knew you’d laugh!”

“I’m not laughing!” I protest. “I think it’s great!” I give another snort of laughter, and try to pretend I’m coughing. “Sorry! Sorry. So — how did it happen?”

“It was at that party in Scotland!” she wails. “There was no one else there except loads of ancient aunts. Tarquin was the only other person under ninety. And somehow… he looked all different! He had on this really nice Paul Smith jersey, and his hair looked kind of cool — and it was like, is that really Tarquin? And I got quite pissed — and you know what that does to me. And there he was…” She shakes her head helplessly. “I don’t know. He was just… transformed. God knows how it happened!”

There’s silence. I can feel my cheeks growing redder and redder.

“You know what, Suze,” I admit sheepishly at last. “I think it kind of might have been… my fault.”

“Your fault?” She raises her head and stares at me. “How come?”

“I gave him the jumper. And the hairstyle.” I flinch at her expression. “But I mean, I had no idea it would lead to… to this! All I did was give him a look!”

“Well, you’ve got a lot to answer for!” cries Suze. “I’ve been so stressed. I just keep thinking, I must be a complete pervert.”

“Why?” I say, my eyes brightening. “What does he get you to do?”

“No, silly! Because we’re cousins. Well, distant cousins, but still…”

“Ooh.” I pull a face — then realize that isn’t exactly tactful. “But I mean, it’s not against the law or anything, is it?”

“Oh God, Bex!” wails Suze. “That really makes me feel better.”

She picks up her mug and mine, takes them over to the sink, and starts to run the tap.

“I just can’t believe you’re having a relationship with Tarquin!” I say.

“We’re not having a relationship!” squeals Suze, as though I’ve scalded her. “That’s the point. Last night was the very last time. We’re both completely agreed. It’ll never happen again. Never. And you mustn’t tell anyone.”

“I won’t.”

“No, I’m serious, Bex. You mustn’t tell anyone. No one!”

“I won’t! I promise! In fact—” I say, having a sudden idea. “I’ve got something for you.”

I hurry into the hall, open one of my suitcases, and scrabble for the Kate’s Paperie carrier bag. I pluck a card from the pile, scribble “To Suze, love Bex” inside, and return to the kitchen, sealing the envelope.

“Is this for me?” says Suze in surprise. “What is it?”

“Open it!”

She tears it open, looks at the picture of a zipped-up pair of lips, and reads aloud the printed message:


Roomie — your secret’s safe with me.


“Wow!” she says, wide-eyed. “That’s so cool! Did you buy it especially? But I mean…” She frowns. “How did you know I’d have a secret?”

“Er… just a hunch,” I say. “You know. Sixth sense.”

“You know, Bex, that reminds me,” says Suze, flipping the envelope back and forth in her fingers. “You got quite a lot of post while you were away.”

“Oh right.”

In the astonishment of hearing about Suze and Tarquin, I’d kind of forgotten about everything else. But now the hysteria which has been lifting my spirits starts to evaporate. As Suze brings over a pile of unfriendly-looking envelopes, my stomach gives a nasty flip, and I suddenly wish I’d never come home. At least while I was away, I didn’t have to know about any of this.

“Right,” I say, trying to sound nonchalant and on top of things. I leaf through the letters without really looking at them — then put them down. “I’ll look at them later. When I can give them my full attention.”

“Bex…” Suze pulls a face. “I think you’d better open this one now.” She reaches for the pile and pulls out a brown envelope with the word SUMMONS on the front.

I stare at it, feeling mortified. A summons. It was true. I’ve been summonsed. I take the envelope from Suze, unable to meet her eye, and rip it open with trembling fingers. I scan the letter without saying anything, feeling a growing coldness at the base of my spine. I can’t quite believe people would actually take me to court. I mean, court is for criminals. Like drug dealers and murderers. Not for people who just miss a couple of bills.

I stuff the letter back into its envelope and put it on the counter, breathing hard.

“Bex… what are you going to do?” says Suze, biting her lip. “You can’t just ignore that one.”

“I won’t. I’ll pay them.”

“But can you afford to pay them?”

“I’ll have to.”

There’s silence, apart from the drip-drip of the cold-water tap into the sink. I look up, to see Suze’s face contorted with worry.

“Bex — let me give you some money. Or Tarkie will. He can easily afford it.”

“No!” I say, more sharply than I’d intended. “No, I don’t want any help. I’ll just…” I rub my face. “I’ll go and see the guy at the bank. Today. Right now.”

With a sudden surge of determination I scoop up the pile of letters and head to my room. I’m not going to let all this defeat me. I’m going to wash my face, and put on some makeup, and get my life back in order.

“What will you say?” says Suze, following me down the corridor.

“I’ll explain the situation to him honestly, and ask him for a bigger overdraft… and take it from there. I’m going to be independent and strong, and stand on my own two feet.”

“Good for you, Bex!” says Suze. “That’s really fantastic. Independent and strong. That’s really great!” She watches as I try to open my suitcase with shaking fingers. As I struggle with the clasp for the third time, she comes over and puts a hand on my arm. “Bex — would you like me to come too?”

“Yes, please,” I say in a small voice.


Suze won’t let me go anywhere until I’ve sat down and had a couple of brandies for Dutch courage. Then she tells me how she read an article the other day that said your best negotiating weapon is your appearance — so I must choose my outfit for seeing John Gavin very carefully. We go right through my wardrobe and end up with a plain black skirt and gray cardigan which I reckon shouts “frugal, sober, and steady.” Then she has to choose her own “sensible, supportive friend” outfit (navy trousers and a white shirt). And we’re almost ready to go when Suze decides that if nothing else works, we might have to flirt outrageously with him, so we both change into sexy underwear. Then I look at myself in the mirror and suddenly decide I look too drab. So I quickly change into a pale pink cardigan, which means changing my lipstick.

At last we get out of the house and arrive at the Fulham branch of Endwich Bank. As we go in, Derek Smeath’s old assistant, Erica Parnell, is showing out a middle-aged couple. Between you and me, she and I have never exactly got on. I don’t think she can be quite human — she’s been wearing exactly the same navy blue shoes every time I’ve seen her.

“Oh, hello,” she says, shooting me a look of dislike. “What do you want?”

“I’d like to see John Gavin, please,” I say, trying to sound matter-of-fact. “Is he available?”

“I shouldn’t think so,” she says coldly. “Not without notice.”

“Well… could you possibly just check?”

Erica Parnell rolls her eyes.

“Wait there,” she says and disappears behind a door marked “Private.”

“God, they’re horrible here!” says Suze, lolling against a glass partition. “When I go to see my bank manager he gives me a glass of sherry and asks me about all the family! You know, Bex, I really think you should move to Coutts.”

“Yes, well,” I say. “Maybe.”

I’m feeling slightly jittery as I leaf through a pile of insurance brochures. I’m remembering what Derek Smeath said about John Gavin being rigorous and inflexible. Oh God, I miss old Smeathie.

Oh God, I miss Luke.

The feeling hits me like a hammer blow. Since I got back from New York I’ve been trying not to think about him at all. But as I stand here, all I wish is that I could talk to him. I wish I could see him looking at me like he used to before everything went wrong. With that quizzical little smile on his face, and his arms wrapped tightly around me.

I wonder what he’s doing now. I wonder how his meetings are going.

“Come this way,” comes Erica Parnell’s voice, and my head jerks up. Feeling slightly sick, I follow her down a blue-carpeted corridor, into a chilly little room furnished with a table and plastic chairs. As the door closes behind her, Suze and I look at each other.

“Shall we run away?” I say, only half-joking.

“It’s going to be fine!” says Suze. “He’ll probably turn out to be really nice! You know, my parents once had this gardener, and he seemed really grumpy — but then we found out he had a pet rabbit! And it was like, he was a completely different—”