Julie Garwood - Saving Grace

"Father, would you honor us by taking over the vacant chamber upstairs tonight?" Johanna asked.

The priest turned his gaze to his laird. He waited for him to extend his invitation.

"It's a comfortable bed, Father," Gabriel remarked.

Father MacKechnie smiled. "I'll be happy to take it," he said. "It's most hospitable of you to open your home to me."

Father MacKechnie stood up, bowed to his laird, and then went to collect his things. Johanna walked back over to her chair, gathered her tapestry and needle and put them back inside her bag. Gabriel waited for her near the entrance.

"You may leave your sewing on the chair, wife. No one will bother it."

Dumfries came back into the hall, passed Johanna on her way to the stairs, and growled at her. She patted the hound before continuing on.

Gabriel followed Johanna up the stairs. She seemed preoccupied with her thoughts while she prepared for bed. He added a log to the fire, then stood up, leaned against the mantel, and watched her.

"What are you thinking about?"

"This and that."

"That isn't a proper answer, Johanna."

"I was thinking about my life here."

"You've made the transition without much difficulty," he remarked. "You should be happy."

Johanna tied the belt to her robe and turned to her husband. "I haven't made any transition, Gabriel. 'Tis the truth I've been living in limbo. I've been caught between two worlds," she added with a nod.

Her husband sat down on the side of the bed and pulled his boots off.

"I meant to talk to you about this topic earlier today," she said. "But there didn't seem to be enough time."

"Exactly what is it you're trying to tell me?"

"You and all the others have been treating me like a visitor, Gabriel. Worse, I've been acting like one."

"Johanna, you aren't making any sense. I don't take strangers to my bed. You're my wife, not a visitor."

She turned her gaze to the fire. She was thoroughly disgusted with herself. "Do you know what I've realized? In my bid to protect myself, I've become completely self-consumed. I'll have to go to confession tomorrow and beg God's forgiveness."

"You have no need to worry about protecting yourself. It's my duty to take care of you."

She smiled in spite of her irritation. Gabriel sounded insulted.

"No, it is my duty to take care of myself."

He didn't like hearing her opinion. His scowl was as hot as the fire. "Do you deliberately try to rile me by suggesting I can't take care of you?"

She hurried to soothe him. "Of course not," she answered. "I'm pleased to have your protection."

"You contradict yourself, woman."

"I'm not trying to confuse you, Gabriel. I'm just trying to sort things out in my mind. When someone's hungry and there isn't any food, well then that someone is consumed day and night with the worry of finding something to eat. Isn't that true, husband?"

Gabriel shrugged. "I would imagine so."

"For a long time I've been consumed with fear. I lived with it for so long, it seemed to take control of me, but now that I'm safe, I've had time to think about other matters. Do you understand?"

He didn't understand. He didn't like seeing her frown either. "I've told you, you please me. You needn't be worried."

She was exasperated. Since she was turned away from her husband, she felt it safe to smile. "Gabriel, as surprising as this may be for you to hear, I'm not overly concerned about pleasing you."

He was surprised all right as well as irritated. "You're my wife," he reminded her. "It is therefore your duty to want to please me."

Johanna let out a sigh. She knew her husband didn't understand what she was trying to explain. She couldn't fault him. She barely understood herself.

"I meant no insult, m'lord."

She sounded sincere. Gabriel was appeased. He came up behind her and wrapped his arms around her waist. Then he leaned down to kiss the side of her neck.

"Come to bed now. I want you, Johanna."

"I want you, too, Gabriel."

She turned around and smiled at her husband. He lifted her into his arms and carried her to bed.

They made slow, sweet love to each other, and when they each had found their fulfillment, they held each other close.

"You do please me, woman." His voice was gruff with affection.

"Remember your praise, m'lord, for I'm certain there will be times in future when I don't please you."

"Is this a worry or a prophecy?"

She leaned up on her elbow and gently stroked the side of his neck. "Nay, I give you only the truth."

She turned his attention with her question about his intentions for tomorrow. He wasn't accustomed to discussing his plans with anyone, but he was in the mood to make her happy and so he went into detail about the hunt he planned and the items he and his men planned to steal.

She vowed not to lecture him. She couldn't keep silent more than a few minutes, though, and hurled herself into a speech about the merits of probity. She mentioned the wrath of God on Judgment Day. Gabriel wasn't impressed with her speech about fire and brimstone. He yawned in the middle of it.

"Husband, it's my duty to help you lead a good, honest life."

"Why?"

"So you'll get to heaven, of course."

He laughed. She gave up. She fell asleep worrying about her husband's soul.

The first thing Johanna noticed when she came downstairs the following morning was her tapestry. The half-completed wall hanging had been ripped to shreds. Her bag wasn't intact either. The culprit was busy chewing on one of the burlap straps. He'd already devoured the other one.

Dumfries knew he'd gotten into mischief. He tried to crawl under one of the chairs when she shouted his name and started toward him. The chair went crashing to the ground; Dumfries started howling, and Megan came running from the buttery.

The dog sounded like a demon let out of hell. The frightening sound he made was loud enough to shake the rafters. The noise terrified Megan. Even though the hound wasn't paying her any attention, she was still extremely cautious when she bent to pick up the tapestry.

Keith and Calum both heard the commotion and came running inside. They came to a dead stop on the top step. Gabriel was right behind them. He shoved the soldiers out of the way and started down the steps.

Johanna was involved in a tug of war with Dumfries. The dog was winning. She was trying to get her bag out of his mouth. She was concerned the hound would choke on the strap he was trying to swallow.

"Good God, Megan, what have you done to your lady's tapestry?" Keith demanded when he finally figured out what she was holding in her hands. He scowled at the Maclaurin woman and shook his head.

Johanna didn't take her attention away from the hound when she called out to Keith. "Sir, you do honestly believe Megan ate the thing?"

Calum started laughing. Johanna lost her footing and went flying backward. Gabriel caught her. He lifted her out of his way and turned to his pet. Johanna ran around her husband to stand in front of the hound.

"Gabriel, don't you dare strike your dog."

She shouted her command so she'd be heard over Calum's laughter. Gabriel looked like he wanted to shout at her.

"I have no intention of striking him. Get out of my way, woman, and quit wringing your hands. I'm not going to hurt him. Dumfries, quit that damned howling."

Johanna didn't move. Gabriel lifted her out of his way, then knelt down on one knee and forced the dog's mouth open so he could pull the strap free. Dumfries didn't want to let go. He yelped in protest before he gave in.

Gabriel wouldn't let her comfort the dog. He stood up, grabbed her by the shoulders, and demanded she kiss him good-bye.

"In front of your men?" she whispered.

He nodded. She started to blush. His mouth captured hers in a long, lingering kiss. She sighed then. She was a bit rattled when he pulled away.

"You look tired, wife. You should rest."

Gabriel made the remark on his way to the doors. She chased after him.

"You cannot be serious, m'lord."

"I'm always serious, m'lady."

"But I only just got out of bed. Surely you don't expect me to take a nap now."

"I do expect you to rest," he called over his shoulder. "And change your plaid, Johanna. You're wearing the wrong one."

"It's Friday, m'lady." Calum added the reminder.

She let out a loud, unladylike sigh. Megan waited until the men had left, then hurried over to her mistress. "Do go inside and sit down, Lady Johanna. You don't want to overdo."

Johanna felt like screaming. She resisted the urge. "For the love of… Megan, do I look ill to you?"

The Maclaurin woman studied her closely before shaking her head. " 'Tis the truth you look fit to me."

"Are you going to sit down and rest?" Johanna asked.

"I've got work to do," Megan answered. "I don't have time to sit."

"Neither do I," Johanna muttered. "It's high time I took an interest in the running of this household. I've been entirely too self-consumed. All that's going to change, however. Starting now."

Megan had never seen her mistress sound so commanding. "But, m'lady, your husband has ordered you to rest."

Johanna shook her head. She rattled off the list of chores she wanted to complete by nightfall, gave Megan permission to enlist the help of two more servants, and then announced she was going to speak to Cook about dinner.