"Want to?"

"I hurt, I want her so badly."

"Jesus, god, Tor - does she know?"

Tory shrugged. "Not exactly. I didnt want to admit it to myself, and then last night -" Her voice faltered as the memory of Reeses touch stirred her like a caress.

"What!? Last night what?"

"She kissed me. I mean, we kissed - "

Catherine expelled another long sigh. "That ought to be some indications shes gay, dont you think?" she queried with just a hint of laughter in her voice. Her laughter died as a haunted look flickered across her sisters face.

"Tory," she said gently, "tell me whats really happening here."

Torys hands clenched around the clay mug while she struggled for words. Haltingly she gave voice to her fears.

"I havent wanted anyone in so long. I dont mean sex." She looked away, blushing. "Although come to think of it, I havent wanted that either. Ive made a good life for myself here. Ive been happy. Now all I can think about is her. I cant look at her without wanting to touch her. Its like Im another person. I dont even recognize myself! Then, when she kissed me! Its as if I was suddenly living someone elses life! All Ive been able to think about was how she made me feel, how her breath brushed against my neck, how her hands seemed to reach inside of me. Im losing my mind!"

She stared at her sister, her expression agonized. "What if it doesnt mean anything to her, Cath? What if its all a mistake? How will I bury all these feelings again?"

Catherine slid her chair closer, removing the cup from her sisters unconscious grasp. She took Torys hands in hers.

"Tory - honey, youve been sleep walking the last four years. You think youve been happy, but its more like youve been numb. Those of us who love you know that. I dont know a thing about this woman, but for her to move you like this - there has got to be something there. I dont know if she deserves someone as wonderful as you, or even if she has the good sense to know how lucky she is that you want her. But I could kiss her myself for making you feel this way. God knows, I never want to see you hurt again, but Tory! Youre not in someone elses life. Youve just come back to your own!"

"I dont know if I want these feelings, Cath," Tory whispered. "Im afraid to trust her, afraid that Ill be wrong again. I trusted K.T. completely, and I was so wrong!"

Catherine smiled sadly. "Some things we cant chose,Tory. Sometimes our life just finds us."

Tory was silent a long time. At last she gave her sister a tremulous smile. "I sound like a lunatic, dont I?"

Catherine laughed. "You sound like a woman mad with lust! What are you going to do?"

Tory grimaced. "I wish I knew. Im almost afraid to see her again. Im afraid I might have imagined last night. And Im just as terrified that I didnt!"

Catherine chose her next words carefully. "Are you in love with her?"

"I cant think about that, Cath, I really cant."

"You might want to before you sleep with her."

"I know," Tory whispered softly.

**********

"Brianna! Wait a minute after class, will you," Reese asked when she and the teenager finished their training.

Brianna looked uneasy, but nodded her assent. She followed Reese through the breeze way to the house.

"Sit down," Reese said, gesturing to the stool by the counter. She poured them both orange juice and took a seat next to her student.

"Bri," she began, "has anyone been hassling you, or any of your friends?"

"What do you mean?" Bri mumbled, uncertain of the conversation, still uncertain of any adult. And as fair as Reese had been, she still worked with her father!

"Is anybody giving you a hard time about being gay?"

Bri snorted in disgust. "Shouldnt you be asking who hasnt hassled us?"

"How? What are they doing?"

She wasnt yet ready to believe that Reese was really on her side, as much as she wanted her to be. She tried so hard to be strong, especially when Caroline was with her. She had to be able to stand up for them, didnt she? Deep inside she feared that if Caroline saw her uncertainty, and her vulnerability, she would leave her. Bri looked at Reese directly for the first time. Reese just looked back at her with eyes filled with concern. Bri took a deep breath, and took a chance. Sometimes it was just too hard to be alone.

"Most of the kids at school who know about us just avoid us. All of a sudden we dont get invited any where any more. Some of them make noises when we walk by, or call us names under their breath. Nothing you can really call them on. They just make it real clear that we dont belong. Theres not that many of us - at least not that I know about. Some of the guys are pretty obvious. You know, kind of faggoty. A couple of them have been beat up."

"Who beat them up?" Reese asked, her voice like flint.

Bri shrugged. "Some of the jocks. They were mostly showing off, I think."

"Has anyone bothered you?"

Bri looked away, shaking her head noncommittally.

"Bri?" Reese persisted gently.

"Not exactly. Theres a guy who had the hots for my girlfriend. He tried to push me around once."

Reese forced down the surge of anger. "What happened?"

"I kicked him in the balls."

Reese would have smiled if the situation werent so serious, and so intolerable.

"And that was that?"

Bri shrugged again, her expression nonchalant. "So far."

"Have you heard of anyone being followed, or threatened by a bunch of guys in a truck?"

"No." Bri stared at her suspiciously. "Whats going on?"

"Im not sure anything is going on," Reese admitted. "Two boys were bothered last night by some men in a drive by thing. Im not sure it was because the kids were gay. But it worries me. Ask around among your friends. If theres gay bashing going on, I want to know."

"Why?" Bri asked bitterly.

"Because I wont have it in my town," Reese said darkly.

"Yeah, wells, youre the only one then."

"I dont think so, Bri. There are plenty of people who wouldnt tolerate it, your father included."

"Hes said the only reason the gays and lesbians are welcome here is because its so good for business!" Brianna exclaimed.

"Maybe he did say that, Bri, but that doesnt mean he feels that way himself!"

Reese could tell the young woman remained unconvinced, but she needed to get her message across. "Bri, I want you and your friends to be careful. And I need you all to help me out. If you see or hear of anything happening, please tell me. And youve all got to stay out of the dunes at night."

Briannas face set in defiance. "Right."

"Bri -"

The teenager stood suddenly, her dark eyes flashing. "You dont get it, do you? You act like you do, but you dont. I want to be able to kiss my girlfriend, okay? Thats what its about -out there in the dunes - its about making love with the person you love. Do you think my father would understand that? What I want to do with my girlfriend ? Do you understand?" She turned away, a cry escaping. "If I cant make a place for us, I dont deserve to have her!"

Reese laid her hand on the young womans shoulder, meaning only to offer some comfort. She was shocked when Brianna turned to her, burying her face against Reeses chest. Bri was sobbing like a child, but Reese knew she wasnt. She didnt need to have experienced it herself to believe that Bri and Caroline were in love. And she had an idea what that meant for a girl like Bri. Bri would need to feel that she deserved Carolines devotion, and she would need to feel that she could protect her. Reese hesitated for only a second, then she gently folded the trembling youth in her arms.

"I do understand, Bri," she whispered, rocking her softly. "I understand exactly how you feel." She had only to think of Tory to know how true her words were. Would she do anything differently were she in Bris place? "Just give me a chance to keep you safe - please. Just give me a little time."

Bri drew a shaky breath, then stepped away self-consciously. "Ill talk to my friends. Tell them what you said. Okay?"

Reese nodded, "Its a start. I appreciate it, Bri. Thanks."

Bri studied her shyly. "I guess you wont tell me if youre gay, huh? Some kind of teacher thing."

Reese recalled Marge asking her the same thing, and her inability to give an honest answer. She thought she had a clearer answer now.

"Think of it as a cop thing," she responded lightly. "But you can believe me when I tell you I know what youre feeling about Caroline, okay?"

Bri grinned. "I guess thats answer enough."

Reese grinned back. "Get out of here. Ive got to go to work."

Bri glanced at the clock as she headed for the door. "I guess Torys not coming today, huh?"

Reese knew without looking that it was well past the time for Tory to have arrived. She had known for some time now, she just didnt know what it meant.


Chapter Sixteen

Tory came fully awake at the first ring of her bedside phone.

"Tory King," she said tersely, her pulse racing. No matter how many hundreds of times she had received these middle of the night calls, she never became immune to the sudden surge of adrenalin, wondering what challenge awaited her.

"Tory, its Nelson Parker. Ive got a situation out here at Race Point, and I need you."

She was already strapping the velcro binders on her leg brace, the phone tucked between her shoulder and her ear.

"What is it?" she asked, reaching for the pair of sweats she had dropped near the bed earlier.

"Cant say on this line," he replied in a voice taut with strain. "Just get here fast."

The line went dead as Tory tossed the receiver down.