Her wooden horse for the win.
Vicki let herself go into auto-mode. Foot in stirrup. Hands on the saddle. With all the practice Joel had made her do, the next motions followed instinctively. She pushed up, lifted her leg over Trigger’s rump and, to her great surprise, ended solidly in position.
She was on a horse. “Fuck.”
Joel laughed, still holding onto Trigger’s halter. “You like it?”
“I’m…no, let’s not go that far.” She wasn’t throwing up, screaming or peeing her pants in terror. She’d take this as a great improvement. “Don’t you dare let go.”
“Wouldn’t dream of it.” He smiled, and she beat down the impulse to tell him exactly what she felt. That expression of pride on his face did something to her. It wasn’t just that he had continued to fulfill their bargain. It was more.
The more than she’d grown to feel wasn’t hers to share. It was driving her crazy, but no way would she make sharing her new emotions a part of this deal. They’d set the boundaries. She wouldn’t cross them.
But would she ever love to be able to say what she’d learned. What was inside screaming to break out. How much she really cared about him. How much being with him had changed her and given her hope.
How much she loved him.
God, she was a stupid twit.
Joel patted Trigger firmly. “You two ready for the next thing?”
The juxtaposition of her thoughts and his comment made her want to cry. Yes, she was ready, for what was never to be…
“Okay.” The word came out a little creaky, but he probably blamed the hesitation on her fears, not on the lump of regret building in her throat.
Joel led Trigger forward slowly, and Vicki worked on releasing the death grip she’d taken on the pommel. Focused on using her thighs to grasp tighter. Her thoughts still raced far faster than Joel paced with the horse.
She was going to get her wish and get the hell out of Rocky. Escape the place that held so many terrible memories and had trapped her. Yet escape meant leaving behind all the good things she’d experienced in the past while.
Sadness coated the pleasure and left her cold inside.
She didn’t think it was all one-sided, either. He liked her as well. Everything about the man said he had some feelings for her—his gentleness and patience. It might have been a verbal deal between them in the start, but it must be more now.
Things had changed. She was sure of it.
Only if she told Joel how she felt, and he admitted this was more than a casual romp between friends? Then what the hell would they do?
She’d run into her mother in the grocery store the other day, and the meeting had left Vicki’s nerves on edge and brittle as Debbie let the accusations fly, cutting remarks that Vicki should be old enough to allow to roll off her back, but couldn’t.
Her sister’s behavior wasn’t any better. Sarah had been caught fooling around with another married man who should have known to keep his zipper up. But the ensuing rush of gossip meant the Hansol name got a fresh whipping through town, and the judgmental glances increased again. The snide remarks. The women who curled themselves protectively around their guys when she and Joel walked into Traders.
As if she’d want their men while holding on to Joel? Stupid bitches.
Still, the actions hurt. Another layer of pain to deal with. Which meant she was back to her dilemma. She could stay in town and continue to be dumped on, and maybe, if she were reading things correctly, she’d get to be with Joel. Or she could make a fresh start somewhere else without her heart.
Fucking great choices.
“You’re so comfortable up there you’re wool-gathering,” Joel teased.
Vicki dragged herself back to reality, shocked to find he was right. “Trigger is kind of like Goliath on steroids. He’s not as scary, because you’re holding him. Don’t stop holding him or anything,” she hastened to add. “This is enough for now.”
Joel patted her leg. “You are doing great. Loosen up, though. If you sit like that for any length of time, you’ll be so sore at the end of the ride you’ll be walking funny.”
“Loosen up?” Vicki stared at her hands, at the saddle under her fingers. She had a hold on the leather, but she wasn’t white-knuckling it anymore. “I think this is about as loose as you’re going to get.”
He kept Trigger moving forward, but shifted closer. He slid his hand up her thigh. “No, I think you can do better.”
No bloody way. “Joel Coleman, if you’re going to start something sexual, you can fuck right off.”
His eyes widened. “Okay, you’re still a little stressed.”
“You think?”
Joel laughed. “I’m not headed for any intimate parts, darling. Trust me.”
That was the problem. She did trust him, and yet was it enough? “Don’t push me too hard. I’m going to break.”
He soothed her, and Trigger at the same time for all she knew, the sound stroking her, but it was too late. Tension had flooded in. Her heart rate had increased, and she really didn’t want to be there anymore.
Like some miracle worker he read her mind. “Come here.”
He opened his arms and she leaned over, clutched his neck and allowed him to pull her from the horse. He cradled her with one hand, pausing only to loop Trigger’s lead rope over a hook before carrying her out of the round pen.
Foolish regret washed over her in a wave. “Damn it, I was doing so well.”
“You are amazing. You got up on the back of a horse. All by yourself. That calls for a celebration.”
“More moonshine shots?”
He snorted. “Not likely. I think I mentioned something else.”
Vicki stared into his face as he carried her to the side of the barn. His eyes sparkled with mischief, his muscles tense under her fingers. “What are you planning…? Oh, you’re not serious.”
She caught hold tighter as he eased her between his body and the ladder fixed vertically to the wall. “The lesson isn’t finished.”
“Oh God, you’re insane.” The idiot went straight up the ladder and into the hayloft, carrying her body weight as well as his own as if she were a feather.
The lighting was thinner up here, no bright fluorescent bulbs overhead. Joel nuzzled her neck as he brought her to where the bales were stacked unevenly, a little bench all ready for him. He sat with her still in his arms, her knees ending up straddling him. “Stand up.”
“You just left Trigger loose in the arena. Saddled and bridled.”
He undid her jeans and tugged them off her hips. “You’re not listening to me.”
“You abandoned your horse.” Oh Lord, what was he up to? She caught his shoulders for balance as he pulled the fabric off one foot, then the other.
“Trigger will hang out until we’re done. It’s like saddle training them when they’re younger.”
Her fingers moved of their own accord and slipped through his soft hair. “Joel?”
He ran his hands over her naked hips, gaze lingering for a moment on her pussy before he met her eyes. “I want you.”
God. If only. Vicki batted down the emotions and slapped her brain until it was focused on nothing but the physical side of that comment. “I’m yours.”
If she’d expected him to go slow, she’d have lost the bet. He jerked her forward and covered her with his mouth, tongue dipping between her folds. His fingers gripped her ass cheeks as he squeezed and played, that damn talented tongue lapping her entire length before stopping to torment her clit.
She dug her hands into his hair and held on tight.
Enthusiasm he had in spades, no doubt about that, eating greedily, driving her crazy. One hand snuck around her hip, caressing her skin until a finger pressed into her, and she groaned out his name.
“You like this, hmm?” He pumped slowly, stroking the most sensitive spots inside, and her legs quivered. Another flurry of his tongue over her clit, and the first orgasm hit, her sheath clutching at the two digits he now spread her on. “Oh, darling, yeah. That’s the way. Cream on my fingers. Mmm, you taste good.”
She wanted him to shut up and get his tongue back on her, but the words were driving her as much as his touch. “Don’t stop.”
Begging. Begging for more, more than he could even know.
He licked and nibbled until she was ready to scream, the constant thrust into her sex flinging her closer to the edge so rapidly she couldn’t breathe. When he pulled his fingers free, she muttered unhappily.
“You just wait, I’m going to fill you up pretty good with something else.” He fumbled at his groin, and she peered down to see he had already rolled on a condom, his thick cock rising from his open pants.
“Hell, yeah.” Vicki dropped into his lap and speared herself on his erection, her head falling back in ecstasy as he stretched her wide. “Oh God, Joel.”
He caught her hips in his hands and rocked her up and down, the wide head of his shaft creating the perfect internal caress. “That’s it. Move over me. Use your thighs. Fuck, that’s good.”
Vicki leaned in and took his lips, the taste of what he’d been doing a moment earlier lingering on his tongue as he helped her fuck herself on his cock. All the way up until he’d nearly break free, then a hard plunge down, her body undulating over him.
He hummed against her lips. “Only thing that would make this better would you being butt-naked, those tits swinging every time you ride.”
Vicki closed her eyes and gripped his shoulders tighter. “Some other time.”
“Nice and smooth, right, feel these muscles?” He stroked her ass, her lower back, returning to massage her butt as he helped carry her weight. “Feel how relaxed you are? That’s the way to ride. Everything moving and easy.”
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