Gabe shoved open the front door, calling as he burst in. “Ma, you seen Ben this afternoon?”

No answer from his ma. The kitchen smelt wonderful as usual, and the oven was hot, crowded with pots for dinner. But there was no sign of either parent.

He stepped out the door off the kitchen and spotted a batch of bright colour over in the garden. His boots left imprints in the soft new grass as he shortcut across to where his ma was working a hoe.

She smiled at him as she leaned on the tall wooden handle. An oversized set of gloves on her hands and a huge pair of rubber boots on her feet, she looked like any of a hundred other ranch women out planting their gardens. It was such a familiar sight.

He had to make sure they didn’t lose the land. No matter how much work it was. This was home.

“You seen Ben lately?”

She pushed a loose hair out from in front of her eyes, frowning for a minute. “I guess I did. He came out of the house about fifteen minutes ago and headed that way.”

She pointed toward the back of the barns, and he waved and took off. He had no more time to waste. Practicing on the donkey—those days were done. Now that he’d had a chance to brainstorm with Allison, there were things they needed to start doing right now. Getting Ben on board was the only way to keep the momentum going.

After Allison’s inspiration? He was ready to take on anyone. There was no way that Ben could dismiss these ideas.

Five minutes later he discovered Ben standing on the edge of the dugout beyond the barn.

He forced the words past his suddenly dry throat. “Got some interesting information for you.”

Ben turned, his brows furrowed together. “What you doing here?”

“Wanted to talk. You got a few minutes?”

His father grunted.

“I took Allison out for a ride the other day, to show her the land.”

Ben scowled harder. “You really marrying that woman?”

“We’re engaged.”

“You knock her up?”

Not only was his father an ass, he had yet to catch up with the twenty-first century. “No. That’s not a reason people get married anymore.”

“Well, she sure the hell must have some excuse to be willing to get tied to a loser like you.”

Gabe pulled in his temper. “This isn’t a discussion about Allison and my relationship. I wanted to let you know she had some great ideas for the ranch—you do remember that she works in the industry. She’s a highly respected consultant.”

Ben crossed his arms. “If she’s willing to get hooked up with you, I’m not sure how highly respected the woman could be. Doesn’t get any from me.”

Gabe chose to ignore the stupid comments and press ahead. “We can make a few changes and start increasing our profits. Aren’t you at least interested in what she had to say about that?”

His father stepped closer. “I’m not interested in a woman coming and telling me how to run my place. I don’t care to hear any ideas from some high-strung pup who can’t keep his responsibilities in line and has to go chasing a skirt to find a way to become important. Is that why you hooked up with her? So people in this town might finally respect you? It’s not going to happen.” Ben spat to the side. “The only reason I don’t kick you out is you at least have the guts to halfway do your job on a daily basis.”

Gabe held in the words he wanted to scream. To tell his father to shove the ranch up his ass, and that Gabe was leaving and never coming back.

The same thing tied his hands as had made him return years ago.

Dana. And Rafe.

Ben reached down and grabbed something from the tall grass before walking away without another word.

Gabe stared after the man, the sense of lost opportunities and lost hope slowly crowded out as he realized what was in his father’s hand.

Dammit. The cardboard box from the kitchen.

Rage exploded like a long-set mine. He pictured the expression on his ma’s face, on Allison’s, as they’d cooed over the tiny kittens.

It might have made no sense, but his limbs were already moving. He threw his hat to the side and raced to the end of the dugout. The water was murky with springtime runoff, but the ditch wasn’t that wide. He stepped forward and leaned over, hands reaching for the bottom. Hoping that whatever Ben had used could be found quickly.

He ended up with his head under the dirty water, hands grasping at weeds and rotting straw that had blown and settled in the waterhole. He rose and sucked in a breath, diving again and moving farther toward the middle. He was nearly out of air when his fingers caught on the edge of a rough sack.

Feet to the bottom to propel himself upward, Gabe pulled the burlap free, lifting it over his head. He scrambled one-handed up the narrow embankment, mud coating his clothes. The chill of the water not even registering as his anger burned.

Yes, at times the farm cats got out of control, but they didn’t have too many right now. No need to go and drown the little things.

His fingers felt like wooden sticks as he tore at the knot. A heavy rock pinned the sack to the ground, motionless lumps lying next to it.

A beam of sunshine hit the ground to his left, spotlighting the sad little creatures he pulled one at a time from the open bag. Motionless, their soft fur matted and clumped to their lifeless bodies. Gabe fought the tears that a grown man shouldn’t shed, but damn it all, this was part and parcel of how fucked up his life had become.

He wasn’t dead, but at times it seemed being dead would be easier. And it was his father who had tied the sack tight and thrown him in.

Regret at having been too late tore through him, and he growled in frustration. Tiny bodies lay in accusation that what he had done was too late and too little.

That it would always be too late and too little.

Gabe jammed on his hat and sat back on his heels. Soaking wet, mud covered from head to toe. Staring down, his heart breaking over a bunch of useless, insignificant kittens.

The urge to give up was so damn strong right then. To become bitter and cold like his father would be preferable to the pain eating him inside.

He moved the kittens back to the sack to carry them to be buried somewhere. One after another he lay them gently next to each other, swear words filling his mind along with the frustration and confusion.

One twitched.

He paused, lifting the soggy black body and placing it carefully in his palm. He gently rubbed up the creature’s chest and neck, like he would a newborn lamb to remove the mucus after it was born. He didn’t dare let the flicker of hope inside grow too fast.

It was like watching a candle on a gusty windowsill quivering to stay lit. The kitten’s chest moved again, and when its tiny mouth opened in a pitiful meow, Gabe bit his lip to stop from shouting out loud.

He tucked the little thing inside his shirt against his body, close enough that even with him soaking wet there was heat. It cuddled in and planted its paws on his skin, needle-sharp claws popping out to poke him, and he didn’t give a shit that he was being used as a pincushion.

It was a hell of a lot harder to one-handed finish the grisly task of caring for the kittens who hadn’t made it, but he was too grateful and too spent to care how long it took or how awkward it was. The tiny creature nestled against his ribs was like a miniature spot of hope.

Fuck his father. The man had told him again and again he was worthless. Why Gabe continued to try had always been for his own reasons. For his ma and brother. For his own soul—to keep alive the good things he knew about himself in spite of whatever Ben said.

He wouldn’t let the bitterness Ben kept dumping on him leach into his soul anymore.

There with the sunshine coming down like in some great cathedral, Gabe had his own revelation. He was done fighting Ben’s way. He was going to win this damn war between them, and he was going to use his own methods to get there.

And heaven help Ben if he wasn’t able to accept that.


Allison wasn’t exactly fussing—it was a teenager joining them for dinner for Pete’s sake. But she knew that of all the people who might see through what she and Gabe were doing, his kid brother was the most likely.

So she’d made sure she stopped working at the restaurant with enough time to get back to Gabe’s cabin to double-check things before Rafe arrived.

Kissing her mom goodbye for the night and seeing her bright smile was encouraging and lightened Allison’s spirits. So far Maisey seemed to be healthy enough. There were no signs of the disease sweeping through her body, but the expected deterioration could begin at anytime, and Allison snatched up every good moment for all she was worth.

There wasn’t much to do to get ready once she did get home—and wasn’t that a strange way to start thinking of Gabe’s place? It was a safe spot, though, after not even a week.

She finished setting the table then suddenly realized something.

She slipped into her bedroom and nabbed her things. It was a little weird to waltz into Gabe’s room and deliberately put her clothes there. It wasn’t as if she had to shove her nightclothes under the pillow, but her robe hung on the hook next to the bathroom, and she dropped her makeup kit on the dresser top.

She had to grab her pillow from the spare room and place it at the head of the bed, and this unexpected sensation snuck over her.

Kissing him the other day wasn’t something she should be remembering in such minute detail. The firmness of his lips, the pressure of his hands on her hips.

They were getting along fine, and she had been mean to tease him so hard. And mean to tease herself because with things working out with Mom, at least temporarily, there was a whole bunch too much time to think about how hot and achy Gabe made her.