Vanessa looked at her now. “Can't I just stay here?” Serena felt as though she had been slapped by her daughter.
“Don't you want to come with me, Vanessa?” Serena had to fight back tears.
“But who'll take care of Uncle Teddy?”
“He will. And you know, one of these days he might get married too.”
“But don't you love him?” Vanessa looked more than ever confused, and Serena looked distraught.
“Of course I do, but not that way—oh, Vanessa, love is complicated.” How could one explain to a child about passion? “Anyway, now this nice man has come along and he wants you and me to come and live with him in London. And he has a house in Athens, and an apartment in Paris, and …” She felt like a complete fool trying to convince her daughter. Vanessa was just a child, not yet eight, and yet she knew when her mother was doing something wrong. Dorothea Kerr had been a great deal more blunt about it.
“Frankly I think you're stark-staring crazy.”
“I know, I know. It sounds nuts.” Serena was constantly having to defend what she was doing and it was exhausting. “But, Dorothea, this is special. I don't know how to tell you. He loves me, I love him. Something magical happened between us when he was here.”
“So he's good in bed. So what? So go sleep with him in London or Paris or the Congo, but don't marry him. For chrissake, the man has been married four or five times.”
“Four.” Serena corrected soberly.
“And just what do you think will happen to your career? You won't stay on top forever, kid. Some new face will come along.”
“That's going to happen anyway, and I can work in London.” There was no convincing her, but by the time she left New York, three weeks later. Serena's psyche was exhausted. She was tired and pale and hadn't slept in weeks.
Teddy took them to the airport, and all three of them cried as though it were the end of the world. He was quiet and restrained, but the tears flowed down his face as he kissed Vanessa, and Vanessa clung to him like her last friend. Serena felt as though she were destroying the family she cherished, and at the end she held Teddy in her arms and she couldn't even speak. All she could manage to squeeze out just before they boarded was an anguished “I love you.” And then with a last wave they were gone. The flight over was bumpy and Vanessa cried most of the way, and by the time they reached London, Serena was almost ready to turn back. But as she stepped off the plane she saw him, and her eyes filled with tears as she laughed. Vasili looked like a balloon vendor at a fair, as he stood with at least fifty helium-filled balloons in one hand, and an enormous doll stuck under his other arm.
“Is that him?” Vanessa stared at him with interest, and it struck Serena again how much she looked like Brad.
“Yes. His name is Vasili.”
“I know.” Vanessa glanced disparagingly over her shoulder at her mother and Serena grinned at what an able grown-up she could be sometimes.
The doll was wearing a fancy blue satin dress, a small white fur cape, and an old-fashioned hat. She looked like a little girl of a hundred years before.
Vasili came slowly toward them, the balloons held aloft, as people smiled. “Hello, could I sell you a balloon, little girl?” Vanessa laughed. “And I also happen to have this dolly.” He pulled the big handsome doll out from under his arm and handed her to Vanessa. “Hello, Vanessa. My name is Vasili.”
“I know.” She stared at him, as though sizing him up, and he laughed. “I'm glad you came to London.”
She looked at him honestly. “I didn't want to come. I cried a lot when I left New York.”
“I can understand that.” He spoke to her gently. “When I was a little boy, I lived in London, and then I had to move to Athens, and that made me very sad.” Serena recalled as he said it that he had been two when his parents died, and he couldn't possibly remember, but at least it sounded good to the child. “Do you feel better now?” She looked up at the balloons and nodded. “Shall we go home?” He held out a hand to her and she took it, and then for the first time he stood up and looked into Serena's eyes. “Welcome home, my darling.” Her heart melted as she looked at him. She wanted to thank him for how wonderful he had been to Vanessa, but she knew that this wasn't the time. She could only tell him what she felt with her eyes.
At the little house in Chelsea he had prepared everything for Serena and Vanessa. There was. a dollhouse in the little blue and white guest room. There were dolls on the bed. There was a chair just Vanessa's size. And all over the house were enormous bouquets of beautiful flowers. He had hired a new maid to take care of Vanessa. And there was champagne cooling in a silver bucket in their bedroom, when at last Serena sat down on the bed with a sigh.
“Oh, Vasili… I thought I'd never survive.” She thought back over the past weeks and almost shuddered. For hours on the plane all she had been able to think of was Teddy, looking so bereft when they left, and his begging her not to get married right away. She had cried when she said good-bye to Dorothea Kerr too, and she already felt a twinge of nostalgia for the life she had left behind in New York. And yet this was going to be so much better, and she knew that this was right for her. But all her life she had been saying good-bye to beloved people and places, and each time she did so again, it brought back some of the sorrow of the past.
“Was it very rough?”
She looked at him a little sadly. “In a way, but I kept thinking that I was coming home to you.” And then she smiled tenderly at him. “I had a hard time convincing people that we aren't crazy.” She looked at him with a bittersweet smile. “Doesn't anyone believe in love anymore?” Yet even in her own heart she knew that she had done something crazy, or impetuous at best.
“Do you believe in love, Serena?” He looked at her as he handed her a glass of the chilled champagne and she took it from him.
“I wouldn't be here if I didn't, Vasili.”
“Good. Because I love you with all my heart.” He toasted her quietly. “To the woman I love … to my princess.…” He linked his arm in hers and they took the first sip, and then his eyes danced as he looked into hers. “How soon is the wedding?”
She smiled tiredly at him. “Whenever you like.”
“Tomorrow,” he teased.
“How about giving us a little time to adjust?”
“Two weeks?” She nodded. “In two weeks then, Mrs. Arbus. Until then you remain my princess.” He smiled gently at her then and took her face in his hands to kiss her, and moments later her body was entwined with his on the enormous bed, and Teddy and Dorothea and New York were all but forgotten.
41
A minister performed the ceremony. Three of Vasili's other four weddings had been only civil, so the minister had been willing to perform this one for them, after some discussion with both the bride and groom. Vanessa stood beside her mother at the wedding, holding tightly to her hand and glancing at Vasili. In the past two weeks she had begun to like him, but he was still a stranger to her, and she didn't see him very often. He was at the studio most of the time in the daytime, and every night they went out.
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