His eyes searched the crowd, and he wandered slowly toward where the visitors were gathered. Signs waved, bunches of flowers were held aloft, tears streamed down faces, frantic hands reached out to husbands and sons and lovers who had been gone for years. And then suddenly he saw her, so staggeringly beautiful that he felt his heart lurch. She stood very tall, and wide eyed and quiet, in a red silk dress that hung straight and narrow on her body, with her silky blond hair loose on her shoulders, and the emerald-green eyes looking straight at him. Like her, he was oddly silent, there were no wild gestures, no running, he just walked steadily toward her, and then as though they both knew, he pulled her into his arms and held her with all his might, as tears ran down both their cheeks, and then forgetting the years that had drifted between them, he kissed her full on the mouth, as though to ease away all the years of loneliness and pain. They held each other that way for long moments, and then at last pulled apart and looked at each other, but her eyes were full and sad as they reached up to his. Teddy had come to her, she knew now, but Brad never would. It was as though in the past three years, waiting for his return, she had fooled herself that it was Brad in Korea and not Teddy. But she understood now, almost like a physical blow, that her husband was lost forever. In all the years of letters it had been as though she were reaching out to Brad as well as Teddy. The two men had somehow merged as one in her mind. And now she had to face the truth again, as her heart plummeted within her and she tried not to let her grief show in her face.

“Hello, Serena.”

She smiled now, over the first shock, and then simultaneously they both looked down at the little girl beside her. It was here that they both saw the three lost years most clearly. Vanessa was almost seven, and she had been three and a half when Teddy left.

“Good Lord, princess!” He knelt down in the hubbub to talk to Vanessa. His eyes were a bright dancing blue, and his face lit up in a gentle smile. “I'll bet you don't remember your uncle Teddy.”

“Yes, I do.” She tilted her head to one side, and when she smiled, he saw that both her front teeth were missing. “Mommy showed me your picture every night. Yours and my daddy's, but he's not coming home too. Mommy told me. Just you.”

“That's right.” A little knife of pain cut through both Serena and Teddy at once, but he was still smiling at the little girl. “I sure have missed you.” She nodded seriously as she looked him over.

“Are you really a doctor?” She looked worried as he nodded. “Are you going to give me a shot?” He chuckled and shook his head as he lifted her up to his shoulder.

“I certainly am not. How about an ice cream cone instead?”

“Oh, boy!” They began drifting through the crowd toward the main terminal. He had to pick up his bag, and then they could be on their way, back to the apartment he had helped her find before he left, to the place he had remembered every night and day as he sat in the jungles of Korea, remembering Serena's face. And now, as he glanced at her, he saw that she had changed. He didn't say anything to her about it until they were back in the apartment on Washington Street, and they were sitting in the living room together, drinking coffee and looking out at the bay.

He eyed her for a long searching moment, seeing the sadness still there, and the seriousness, and at the same time something tender, and he reached gently for her hand as he set down his cup. “You've grown up, Serena.”

“I hope so.” She smiled at him. “I'm twenty-seven now.”

“That doesn't matter. Some people never make it.”

“I've had a lot of reason to grow up, Teddy.” She looked toward the other room, to where Vanessa was playing, and then back at him. “So have you.”

He nodded slowly, remembering things he didn't even want to. “Sometimes I didn't think any of us would survive it.” And then he forced a smile. “But we did. And I suppose the experience will be worth something.” And then, seeing all that was in her face, and unable to restrain himself from asking, “You still miss him, don't you?”

She nodded. “Yes, I missed you both.”

“And you only got one of us back.” He looked at her strangely as he said it. He had understood everything he had seen in her face when he first saw her at the gate. “Maybe it never sinks in that someone isn't coming home. I don't know.” He shook his head. “At times I'd wonder for a minute when I'd get a letter from you why there was no news of Brad, and then I'd remember.”

She nodded understanding. “He had only been dead for two months when you left. I don't think either of us had had time to absorb it.” And she knew now more than ever how true that was.

“I know.” He looked at her searchingly. “And now?” He was asking her a serious question and she knew it.

“I think maybe today I finally understood.” She sighed softly. “In a way I've hidden from the truth a lot. All I've done is work and take care of Vanessa.” He knew that from her letters.

“At twenty-seven, that isn't much of a life.” And then, with a gentle smile, “You know, you look different.”

She seemed surprised. “Were you disappointed?” But at this Teddy laughed and shook his head.

“Oh, Serena … haven't you looked in the mirror in the last three years?”

This time she laughed at him. “Too much! That's all I've done.”

“Well, whatever you've done, you're even more beautiful than you were when I left here.”

She squinted at him in amusement. “Has the war perhaps affected your eyesight, Lieutenant?” But they both laughed together.

“No, princess, it hasn't. You're the most beautiful woman I've ever seen. And I thought that was true when I first met you in New York.”

“Ah.” She waved a disparaging hand at him. “Now it's all fakery and makeup.”

“No.” It was something more. Something difficult to describe. Something in her face, in her eyes, in her soul. It was maturity and gentleness, wisdom and suffering, and all of the love that she had lavished on Vanessa. It was something more that she had become in addition to her physical beauty. It was something that made one want to stare at her, something one sensed as well as saw. He looked at her then and asked her a question. “Serena, are you serious about modeling?” He had never given it a thought in all the years in Korea. He just assumed that it was something she did to pay the rent. But now that he saw her, the way her bones had begun to stand out, the way she looked, the way she did her hair and her face, the way she moved now, he knew that if she wanted to she could have a tremendous career. It was the first time the thought struck him, as they sat on the couch. But Serena only shrugged.

“I don't know, Teddy. I don't really think so.” She smiled and looked like a very young girl again. “Why would I want to do that? Except maybe to pay the rent.” That was still a month-to-month struggle for her. Even now.

“Because you're so beautiful, and you could make a lot of money.” He looked pointedly at her. “And since you won't take anything from me, it might be a thought. Have you thought at all about going to New York to model?” She had said nothing about it in her letters, but now he wondered, and he began to like the idea more and more, not for entirely unselfish reasons.

“I don't know. The thought of New York scares me.” She looked worried. “I might not be able to find work in New York.” And yet it was an appealing prospect and maybe a way to make more money than she had in the last three years.

“Are you kidding, Serena?” He took her by the hand and walked her to the mirror. “Look at that, love.” She looked embarrassed and she blushed as she glanced at herself and the handsome blond man standing behind her. “That face would find work as a model anywhere in the world. Principessa Serena … The Princess …”As they stared at her together he suddenly realized that something magical was happening, as though they were seeing each other for the first time.

“Teddy, no … come on.…” She pulled from the mirror, embarrassed, and he turned her slowly to face him, and kissed her, and when he did, he was suddenly overwhelmed with desire for this woman he had secretly loved for seven years. But just as he was about. to touch the beautiful body, he felt her stiffen in his arms, and he made himself stop.

“Serena … I'm sorry …”He looked suddenly deathly pale, and he could feel his whole body tremble. “It's been a long time … and—” He faltered, and she took his face gently in her hands, her eyes filled with tears.

“Stop it, Teddy. You have nothing to be sorry about. I knew this was coming. We both did. We've been pouring our souls out to each other for three years.” And then she dropped her hands from his face, hugged him close, and nestled her face in his shoulder. “I love you as a brother, Teddy. I always have. I was wrong in thinking that there could be something more. For the last year I'd begun to wonder, without really admitting it to myself, but I was hoping that you could come home and”—she choked on her tears —”replace … him.” She felt guilty even saying it, and she pulled away from Teddy at last. “It's not fair to expect that of you. It's just not the same thing. It's funny.” She smiled through her tears. “You're so much like him, but you're you. And I love you, but I love you as a sister, not as a woman, or a lover, or a wife.” They were cruel words and they hit him like rocks. But they were words he needed to hear. He had deluded himself for too many years.

She was watching him closely and he took a deep breath and looked at her with gentle eyes. “It's all right, Serena. I understand.”

“Do you?” She was quiet and firm and more beautiful than he had ever seen her, as she stood before him in her narrow silk dress. “Do you hate me for not being able to give you more?”