Shayla pulled her chair closer and sat, but kept a hand resting on Laura’s thigh. “No, Tony and I aren’t having kids. We have cats.”

“You didn’t want them?”

She shrugged. “I really hadn’t made up my mind. I wasn’t even sure I was going to find a guy to spend my life with. He’d had a vasectomy before I ever met him, and he didn’t want kids.”

Shayla looked thoughtful for a moment. “I’m happy, and even more important, I’m content. I don’t feel any sense of loss by not having kids. I know some people have an overwhelming desire to be a parent, and some have an overwhelming desire never to be a parent. I was in the middle. It didn’t really matter much to me one way or another.” She let out a little laugh. “I damn sure wasn’t giving Tony up over it.”

Laura pondered that for a moment as she took another couple of bites. She still wanted to talk about the dreams she’d had the night before, but couldn’t bring herself to do it. She didn’t want to say anything that might make the one person she really felt connected to as a friend think less of her.

“As long as you’re happy,” she eventually settled on saying.

Shayla’s broad grin said it all. “I am,” she assured her. “Happiest I’ve ever been in my life.”

“I hope I get to that point.”

The smile slowly slid from Shayla’s face. “You are. Well, you were. I’m sure you will be again.”

Laura took another bite but didn’t respond. She wished she felt as sure as Shayla.

* * *

The neurologist came in a couple of hours later, just before lunch. Laura asked Shayla to stay.

“Well,” he said, “I’m thinking we’ll discharge you sometime tomorrow. I’ll have my PA check in with you, but unless anything else crops up, your MRI looks good. The mild swelling you had at first has completely subsided, compared to the MRI we took when you were admitted. You’re a very lucky woman.”

Laura let out a snort. “I don’t feel very damn lucky.”

His expression softened. “I’m sorry, Laura. I know it’s frustrating—”

“You have no fucking idea what I’m feeling!” she shouted, startling both Shayla and the doctor and making the deputy stick his head inside to check on her. “You have no fucking clue what it’s like to not know who I am or the people around me! So don’t fucking tell me ‘you know’ what I’m feeling, because you don’t.”

The doctor slowly nodded. “I’m sorry. You’re right. I don’t know what it’s like for you.”

She collapsed back onto her pillows, her ribs aching in protest at the sudden movement. “Sorry,” she mumbled. “I shouldn’t have lost my temper like that.”

“I saw in your chart that Dr. Simpson consulted with you.”

“Yeah.”

He glanced at Shayla, then back to Laura. “She’s good at what she does. If anyone can help you, she can.”

“Thanks.” She couldn’t roll to her side with her ribs, so she turned her face away from him.

She waited until she heard the room door open and close again to turn back to Shayla. “Did I used to blow my top like that?”

She slowly shook her head. “Not really, but I don’t blame you. I’d probably be a basket case by now. I don’t know how you’re handling it so well.”

“Well?” She wiped at her eyes, determined not to burst into tears for once. “Doesn’t feel like I’m handling it very well from this end.”

* * *

Rob stopped by after lunch to see her for a few minutes. They’d brought a patient into the hospital and his partners on the ambulance crew shooed him upstairs while they prepped for their return to the station. When Shayla tried to step out to give them privacy, Laura and Rob both asked her to stay.

“Can you tell him what the doctor said?” Laura mumbled. “Please?” She was too comfortably snuggled against Rob’s side to talk.

Shayla related the information but left out the outburst.

“That’s great!” Rob said. “I’ll tell the captain I need tomorrow off for sure.”

“Tell him the rest,” Laura said.

“What?” he asked.

She heard Shayla sigh before telling Rob about her outburst.

He gently palmed Laura’s cheek. “Honey, look at me.”

She forced her eyes open and wanted to sink into his sweet brown gaze.

“No one blames you for being emotional,” he gently said. “No one. Especially not us, the ones who love you. God knows Tony and Seth had to deal with their fair share of listening to me rant and rave in the parking lot downstairs while you were unconscious.”

She couldn’t imagine Rob getting angry or losing his temper.

“So please go easy on yourself,” he said. “If you need to scream, or rant and rave, or cry yourself out, whatever. Don’t hold back. That’s what we’re here for, to help you through this. You never have to put on an act for us.”

* * *

It took every ounce of Rob’s will to keep himself from crying. Yes, her bruises were fading, but she talked differently, acted differently, and her palpable emotional pain was something he couldn’t fix.

He hated that. Hated not being able to do something to make this all better for her. To take her pain and tears away.

“I’ll be here first thing in the morning and then I can take you home when they discharge you. Okay?”

She nodded, looking lost. Looking helpless. Forlorn.

If they weren’t short-handed at the station, he would gladly take all of his banked vacation time and use it up over the next few weeks. But he suspected he’d need it spread out over the next weeks and months to go to doctor appointments with her.

“Bill is flying in late tomorrow night. Steve volunteered to drive to Tampa to get him. He’s going to be here for two weeks. He’ll stay with you while I’m at work.”

“I don’t need a babysitter,” she mumbled half-heartedly.

“You do need someone who can handle a gun,” he firmly said in a tone he hoped resonated with her. His “Dom tone” as she used to call it. “I want someone with you who can protect you until we get you trained and get you a gun.”

He’d already called Sully and had that talk with him. Sully had volunteered not only to train her, but to have her stay with them, if necessary, to keep her safe.

It wasn’t the best option, especially considering Rob didn’t know how to break the news to Laura about their friends’ poly triad. But if they still hadn’t caught the fucker who attacked her by then, he would definitely give it serious thought.

Hell, Leah and Seth, as well as Ross and Loren, and Tilly and her guys, had all volunteered to keep her with them. Ross worked, but said Loren and Laura could come to the office during the day. Tony had volunteered to take weekend watches as necessary, or even evenings. Unfortunately with his job he couldn’t watch her during the day or even bring her to work with him.

He didn’t want to tell Laura all of that yet either. Yes, it was arranging a series of babysitters for her. Better that, and risk pissing her off, than taking the chance of the asshole getting another crack at her.

She finally nodded before resting her head against his chest again.

The deputy knocked before opening the door. “Rob, you have company.”

He looked up as Craig and Sean stuck their heads in. “Hey, man,” Sean said. “Sorry, but we need to roll. Punta Gorda got a call and we need to get back to the station to cover.”

“Okay. I’m coming.”

Laura sat up and wiped at her eyes. “Do I know them?”

Rob waved them in. “You’ve met them a couple of times before. This is Craig Jackson and Sean Bellows.”

They stepped over and gently shook hands with her. “Hey, Laura,” Craig said. “How you feeling?”

She shrugged. “Apparently I’ve had better days,” she said.

Sean smiled. “Your sense of humor’s still there.”

Rob carefully untangled himself from her before getting out of bed, mindful of her ribs. He leaned in and kissed her. “I’ll check in with you later, sweetheart.”

“Okay.”

He gave Shayla a hug before leaving and whispered in her ear, “Thank you.”

She gave him a short nod before he headed out, Craig and Sean flanking him.

They stood waiting for the elevator. “I’m really sorry, dude,” Craig said. He’d covered several shifts for Rob after the attack, and had been working with him that night when it happened.

“Yeah,” Sean agreed. “Sorry.”

Rob sucked in a deep breath. “Not a fraction as sorry as the fucker will be if I ever get my hands on him.”

“Well, I don’t think finding an alibi will be a problem if you do,” Sean snarked. “Just make sure there aren’t any video cameras around.”

* * *

Rob coordinated via phone with Tony, Seth, Leah, Tilly, Landry, Cris, Ross, and Loren. He’d given Seth a copy of the new keys for Laura’s condo. They were converging on it that afternoon to clean it and remove all traces of the attack.

Shayla would stop by before they left to make sure everything was exactly as it had been, because she’d been there the evening before the attack watching a movie with Laura. Besides Rob, she was the only other person who would spot anything out of place. She’d also volunteered to go grocery shopping, knowing her friend’s preferences as well as Rob did.

He took the jump seat in back while Craig drove them to the station. Giving up control of all of this had been almost as difficult as being unable to fix Laura’s memory or battered body. It had taken Seth verbally shaking some sense into him over the phone the day before.

“Dude, let us help you. We want to help you. You can’t do this alone, and you shouldn’t have to. Believe me, if it wasn’t for friends, Leah and I couldn’t have handled what we went through. Use us. It’s what we’re here for.”