Devon Hartford - Painless

“See?” I said, “Romeo knows his worth.” I gave him a fist bump.

Kamiko stood beside Romeo. She said, “I still can’t believe someone bought that Wonky Kong portrait of Romeo.”

“What?” Romeo scowled, “It’s awesome. And I think whoever bought it got it for a steal at $150,000. I told you someone would pay to have a painting of me.”

Kamiko rolled her eyes. “Wait til they get the portrait into their house and have to stare at you 24/7.”

“You’re just jealous Christos didn’t paint you,” Romeo sneered.

She rolled her eyes and stuck her tongue out at him.

I said to Kamiko, “I’ll paint you for my next show. We’ll dress you up as one of the Adventure Time characters.”

Her eyes lit up, “Wow, Christos, you’d paint me?”

“Sure,” I smiled. “I’d rather paint a friend over some random model.”

Kamiko clapped her hands together, “I totally want to be painted as Fionna from Adventure Time! I’ll make the costume myself! When can we start!”

“We’ll do it over the summer.”

Kamiko gasped. “That would be so totally awesome, Christos!” Her and Romeo wandered back into the crowd while me and Samantha shared a chuckle.

A few minutes later, Russell walked up to us from out of the crowd. “Congratulations, young man,” he said. “It appears you’re doing rather well tonight.”

“Yeah,” I smiled. “Samantha, you remember Russell Merriweather?”

“Totally,” she grinned, shaking his hand. “Nice to see you again.”

“Nice to see you too, young lady. Have you been keeping this character out of trouble?” He nodded at me.

“Definitely,” she smiled.

“You know,” Russell said, “I bought one of your grandfather’s landscapes.”

“You did?” I asked. “Which one?”

“The one of the valley behind your father’s house at sunrise. I’m always telling Nikolos how much I love the view when I go out there. Since your grandfather decided to paint a picture of it, I thought that would be the next best thing to visiting. I’m hanging it in my downtown office so I can always see it.”

I knew that Brandon had priced that painting at $75,000. “Wow, Russell, that was really generous of you,” I said appreciatively.

“Fiddlesticks.” Russell smiled.

“Fiddlesticks?” I laughed. “Who the fuck says fiddlesticks?”

Samantha giggled at what I’d said.

“I do,” Russell said in his most serious courtroom voice ever, “And if you want to keep your teeth, you won’t make any further issue of it. Are we clear?” He arched an eyebrow, but it only took a second for his face to relax into a big smile.

I shook my head and smiled at him.

“Besides,” Russell said, “Your family has spent plenty of money on me over the years, it was the least I could do.”

“Thanks, man,” I smiled.

"Well, I’ve got to go. Good night, Samantha. Both of you please give my regards to Spiridon and Nikolos,” Russell said before fading into the crowd.

“Russell is so cool,” Samantha said.

“Yup.”

Brandon burst through the crowd a minute later. “It sold! Your portrait of Samantha sold!”

Samantha’s eyes goggled.

So did mine.

“How much?” we both asked.

“One point nine million!” Brandon was beside himself. I’d never seen him lose his cool like this. I wasn’t surprised. A sizable chunk of the money we’d pulled in tonight was his.

Samantha threw her arms around me and planted a huge kiss on my cheek before saying, “Congratulations, Christos!”

A second later, my dad and grandad were pushing through the crowd.

“Congratulations, paidí mou!” my grandad said, leaning over to hug me. “We heard the news.”

“Thanks, Pappoús,” I said.

My dad threw his arms around both of us, “You did it, paidí mou!”

“I couldn’t have done it without you, Bampás,” I said, looking into my father’s eyes. They were brimming with tears. Just like mine.

Brandon grinned while slapping my shoulder vigorously, “A number of the major art magazines have already called. They’re asking to interview you, Christos. You’re going to be the talk of the international art world by tomorrow morning. I told you before, if you ever painted a portrait of Samantha, it would be your Mona Lisa. Now you have it.”

“Mona Lisa?” I chuckled. “You know the Mona Lisa looks like a dude in drag. At least you could’ve said Evening Mood by Bouguereau. The girl in that painting is actually a woman, and she’s beautiful.”

“But that painting isn’t nearly as famous,” Brandon smiled. “Regardless, this portrait of Samantha is going to make your name, Christos. I know it.” Brandon marveled as he gazed at the painting on the wall.

He was entranced by it. I think knowing it sold for so much cash made it that much better in his eyes. I couldn’t blame him. Brandon tore himself away from the painting and said, “Will you be sad to say goodbye to it when the buyer takes possession of it, Christos?”

“Nope.” I smiled down at Samantha, “I get to keep the real thing.”

“I will,” Samantha said. “I love looking at it.” She glanced back at the painting.

“No need to worry, Samantha,” Brandon said.

I frowned, “Why’s that?”

Brandon grinned, “You guys will never guess who the buyer was.”

“Who?” I asked. It couldn’t be Wentworth.

“L.A. M.O.M.A.,” Brandon grinned.

My jaw dropped, “No fucking way.”

“What’s that?” Samantha asked.

“The Los Angeles Museum of Modern Art,” Brandon grinned. “To hang in their permanent collection.” No wonder he was so stoked about selling my painting. This was a huge feather in Charboneau Gallery’s cap.

I said to Samantha, “You know what this means, agápi mou?”

She shook her head.

I grinned, “The whole world is going to see my painting of you.”

Her eyes goggled and she started laughing. “I knew it!”

“What?” I was confused.

“Everyone’s going to see me naked!”

I laughed and so did Brandon.

“No,” I grinned, “everyone’s going to be inspired by your bravery.”

Samantha rolled her eyes, but I leaned down and kissed her passionately anyway. The crowd around us, which was still a bustling mass of men and women in fancy black tie evening wear, started to applaud and hoot.

Me and Samantha continued kissing under the spotlight for a long time in front of everybody.

It was a perfect evening, all the way around.

The only thing still bugging me was whether or not I’d made enough money after giving Brandon his cut to pay back Hunter Blakeley. If I lost his civil suit against me in court I was going to owe him enough cash to fill a bank vault. I noticed Russell hadn’t mentioned the trial when he’d said goodbye tonight. He probably didn’t want to spoil my evening.

Man, why did I have to hit fucking Hunter in the first place? It’s not like I didn’t already know I could kick his ass ten times over.

Oh well.

I’d worry about it tomorrow.

Now it was time to gather everyone up and go celebrate someplace else. There was no way I was letting Hunter Blakeley ruin my perfect evening.

No fucking way.

Besides, what where the chances of running into him tonight?

SAMANTHA

The band on stage at the Belly Up Tavern rocked the house. The place was packed. After the crowd at Charboneau Gallery had finally thinned, we all drove here to unwind and celebrate.

Christos and Jake knew the bouncers outside, so they let me, Madison, Romeo, and Kamiko all sneak inside to see the band. But they made us promise not to order any drinks. Christos and Jake told the bouncers they’d keep an eye on us.

The Belly Up was a combination bar and music venue. It had a really big stage at one end, and two bars at the other. A huge great white shark statue hung over one of the bars on cables and surfboards lined the walls.

“I’ve never been in a bar before,” I hissed to Madison.

“What?” she shouted.

The band was so loud, I don’t know why I was whispering. I leaned over to her ear and said loudly, “I’ve never been in a bar before!”

“Me neither!” she hollered. “Isn’t it awesome?!”

I nodded.

We danced casually, swaying to the music.

Romeo randomly started twerking, his butt thrusting behind him as his arms extended in front of him, stirring the butter churn. It didn’t make any sense because the band played rock, not hip hop. I started giggling instantly.

“What are you doing, Romeo?” Kamiko laughed.

“Trying to lasso me a man!” He grinned and looked around, but the only people watching him looked horrified. Romeo didn’t care. He twerked away like crazy.

I glanced back at the stage and noticed the drummer and the bass player looked familiar. I turned to Madison and shouted, “Hey, aren’t those two guys Jake’s friends?!”

“Yeah!” Madison shouted, “That’s Lucas Summer on bass and his brother Logan on the drums!”

“They helped Christos and Jake move my stuff into the house!” I shouted.

Madison nodded.

The band was really good. The song they were playing started to speed up. The whole house was rocking in time to the music.

Logan was going crazy on the drums. He looked like a wild animal. A total contrast to how shy he’d been the day I’d met him. What was that old saying? Still waters ran deep? Or was it hot shy guys made great rock drummers?

Me and Madison really got into the music, banging our heads like idiots until our hair twirled around. We were both laughing and dizzy and had to stop.