Susan Mallery - Only His

She took the seat next to his desk and drew in a breath. She was shaking a little and thought she might have to throw up. Not the best combination, but waiting would only make things worse.

He drew his eyebrows together and touched her cheek. “You okay?”

She nodded. “I have to tell you something.”

“You’re running off with Cat.”

“No. Although she did ask.”

“You have to give her points for persistence.”

“I do.” She looked into his eyes. “Tucker, I know your relationship with Cat was difficult. That you were obsessed with her.”

He leaned back in his chair. “Tell me about it. What a mistake.”

“It was, but you were a kid.”

“Nearly twenty-three. I should have known better.”

“How? You’d grown up all around the world, never settling in one place. You didn’t know what it was like to just date someone. To have a crush and then get over it. Then you met Cat, and even someone with a whole lot more relationship experience couldn’t have handled her very well. You did the best you could.”

He looked uncomfortable. “Why are you saying this?”

“Because you learned the wrong lesson. Love isn’t a trap. Love is a gift. It makes us stronger. Look at Will. He’s a great guy and loves his job and his life, but have you ever seen him happier? He’s walking away from all of this because he wants to be with Jo.”

“That’s his decision.”

“Do you think he’ll regret it?”

“I don’t know.”

“Yeah, you do.”

He shrugged. “Okay, he’s happy. So what?”

Here it was. The moment of truth. Did she have the courage to say it? To put herself out there? Until this moment, she never had. She’d always taken the safe road, made the easy decision. The biggest risk in her life had been applying for this job. Now it was time to take the next step.

“I love you,” she told him. “We’re good together. I want you to stay and be a part of my life. I want us to have a future.”

She paused, not sure if she could continue or not. As she was trying to make up her mind, she saw horror enter his eyes. Instead of being happy or intrigued, he looked angry.

“Don’t start,” he said, standing. “Dammit, Nevada, why do you have to do this? I told you before. You said you understood. Don’t you get it? I’m not interested.”

With that he walked out.

She stared after him, her heart pounding, her mind unable to absorb what had just happened so quickly. Then she heard the rumble of his truck, the spray of gravel and he was gone.

NEVADA DIDN’T TELL ANYONE. She couldn’t. Pain and shame were an uneasy combination she wasn’t willing to share. She finished her day, went home, got through the night and returned to work the next morning. She didn’t cry. She also didn’t sleep or eat. She was numb most of the time, but when the pain came, it was like knives.

She walked into the trailer telling herself she was getting her hard hat, but secretly she wanted to see Tucker again. Tucker, who hadn’t called. Instead she found Will at his desk.

He looked up when she walked in. His look of concern warned her, but couldn’t begin to prepare her.

“Nevada,” he said. “I don’t know….” He cleared his throat. “He just…” Will crossed to her. “I’m sorry.”

She got it then. Reality slammed into her, nearly knocking her to her knees. She looked around the trailer, seeing what was still there, noticing what was gone.

“He left,” she said flatly.

“I’m sorry,” Will repeated.

Tucker was gone. He hadn’t called in sick or left to meet with a subcontractor. Instead he’d fled Fool’s Gold completely. Without a word.

She knew without asking that he was never coming back.

DESPITE MAYOR MARSHA’S best efforts, people found out about the unveiling ceremony. Nevada had noticed the lack of signs and postings in the online events calendar. For a town that prided itself on keeping its citizens informed, the powers that be had been completely silent when it came to the original sculpture by Caterina Stoicasescu.

Nevada appreciated that she wasn’t asked a lot of questions. She’d managed to get through the past few days by sheer force of will. She’d done her job, and when it was time to go home, she went back to her place, curled up in bed and got up again in the morning.

Some nights she cried. Others she laid in the dark, waiting for the pain inside to lessen just a little. One night she’d actually slept, which would have been a blessing, except she kept dreaming about Tucker.

Before realizing she was in love with him, dealing with her sisters’ double wedding had been a little uncomfortable. Now it was going to be a nightmare. While she’d never imagined she and Tucker would join them as a couple, she’d counted on having him around. Later, she’d imagined a whole lot more. Now all of that was gone. Lost.

Because the construction site was outside of town, no one was used to seeing him around very much. Word of his departure hadn’t spread. The guys on the site knew, but they weren’t going to talk, not to people in town or even to her. They were just a little protective on the job, and they watched her cautiously, so she figured out that they knew.

Will kept his distance. Perhaps because he didn’t want her asking him questions or maybe because he felt bad that he was so happy. Nevada planned on telling him she was glad he and Jo were together. That having her heart broken and losing the man she’d probably loved for the past ten years wouldn’t change that. Just because she wasn’t getting her happy ending didn’t mean she wasn’t interested in other people being together.

If she felt guilty about anything, it was keeping the truth from her family. Not so much her brothers, but her sisters and her mom. They would want to be there for her, to offer comfort. Her friends in town would feel the same way. But she couldn’t face one of those huge “the guy’s a jerk” events that inevitably followed. Until she figured out how she was going to survive the loss, she had to manage her heartache alone and get through the unveiling ceremony without anyone figuring out there was a problem.

The mayor had scheduled the event for three in the afternoon — just when most of the schools were letting out. Nevada guessed her plan was that the mothers and kids would be busy and unable to attend, and most businesspeople would be at work. That left only a small group of the community who would be available to attend.

Sure enough, when Nevada arrived in the center of town, there were only a handful of residents milling around the fabric-covered statue.

“You’re here,” the mayor said, crossing to Nevada. “I want this to be brief. No fanfare. I’ll just speak a few words, then we’ll expose the damn thing to the world.”

The older woman looked more resigned than happy. While Nevada hadn’t seen the completed piece, she’d seen the sketches and knew it was everything the mayor wanted to avoid.

“I’m sorry I couldn’t talk her out of giving this to the town,” she said.

Mayor Marsha shook her head. “Ms. Stoicasescu is very stubborn. No one could have changed her mind. I can only hope someone will vandalize it quickly and we’ll be forced to take it down.” She smiled. “After all, we have an insurance policy to cover that sort of thing.”

“Have you seen it?” Nevada asked.

“No. I couldn’t stand to watch while they installed it.” She glanced up at the fabric blowing in the light breeze. “I shudder to think what people are going to say. I hope the media doesn’t find out about this. They’ll be back in a heartbeat.”

She glanced at her slim watch. “All right. Let’s get this over with.”

The mayor walked to the microphone that had been set up next to the covered sculpture.

“Good afternoon. It is with pleasure that I present the work of Caterina Stoicasescu. This gifted artist has given the town an original piece. To quote her, it represents all that is beautiful and feminine in the town of Fool’s Gold.”

The mayor pressed her lips together, then nodded at a woman in a city park uniform. She pressed a button, and a pulley system was activated. Over the low hum of the engine winding the rope, the heavy canvas rose higher and higher.

Nevada stared at the slender supports, then the bottom of the piece came into view.

The metal curved into a near point. Random squiggling designs decorated the sides. As the cover exposed more, the V shape was more pronounced. At the top, two bulging pods sat on either side of the curving V.

Nevada tilted her head as she stared. To be honest, it wasn’t all that vaginalike — probably a good thing for the town.

“What is it, Mommy?” a little boy asked.

“I have no idea,” his mother replied, sounding puzzled.

“Thank God,” Mayor Marsha murmured.

For the first time in days, Nevada laughed.

TUCKER’S FATHER’S OFFICE was about the size of a bus terminal, with sweeping views of Lake Michigan. Tucker generally enjoyed visiting Chicago. He liked the feel of the city, the restaurants, enjoyed the people. But this time he wasn’t interested in his surroundings. Instead of enjoying the view, he paced in front of his father’s desk.

“I can’t go back,” he repeated for the third or fourth time. “I’m totally at fault. I shouldn’t have gotten personally involved. I know better. I didn’t mean to, but she was there, you know? Just there.”

He paused and looked at his father, who was simply watching him.

“She’s beautiful. That’s part of it. Not traditionally gorgeous like Cat or some model, but there’s something that grabs you, and then doesn’t let go.” He jammed his hands into his jeans pockets, then pulled them out. “She’s good at her job. The guys like her a lot. They respect her. And she’s funny. I have a good time with her.”