The tension around Zach’s eyes eased, his posture no longer stiff as he gave my shoulder a tender squeeze. “I was losing my mind. Thanks for bringing her back.”

“Is she going to be okay?” I asked, knowing he didn’t know any more than I did, but needing to have some hope to hold on to.

“I think so. At least today she will be.”

It was enough. The future didn’t matter yet. What mattered was what was happening right then and there. Mimi was safe and as far as I could tell she was back in the present.

“You going tonight?” I asked.

“Not now. It would feel wrong to leave her.”

I nodded in understanding. While I was disappointed, I got it. I didn’t like what was happening to Mimi and I knew how Zach felt.

“Besides,” he said, “you’ll be cheering on your boyfriend.”

Confusion looped through my mind. Of course I’d be cheering on my boyfriend. That was the sole reason I was going. It definitely wasn’t because the band was good.

“I’m sure you won’t miss much anyway.” I had yet to hear the band play as a whole, but I assumed it wouldn’t be anything to write home about.

“Thanks,” he said and with a last look of gratitude, he headed towards Mimi’s room.

And like Mimi’s memory, he was there one minute and gone the next.

Chapter 11

Josh was due for another visit in two weeks, and I decided to finally cross an item off my bucket list. It was time to throw a party.

And while I was checking things off my list, I decided it was time to finally turn in my v-card too. Joe and I had been together long enough. The Monday after the party, Sadie would be babysitting overnight and I’d have the place to myself. It was perfect.

A party and the demise of my virginity. It was going to be an amazing week. I just had to be patient.

Monday in class Joe wasn’t there. Ever since he became an official member of the band he’d been blowing off classes more and more. I texted him, but he never responded.

“Where’s Joe?” Zach’s voice was hot against my ear. I whipped around, our eyes instantly connecting as if they were magnets.

I snapped them away and pulled at the hair tie on my wrist. “Not here.”

“That’s the fourth time this month.”

What was he, a human attendance list?

“Probably band stuff,” I muttered, not sure what else to say since I really had no idea where he was.

At my words, something flashed through his eyes and I couldn’t tell if it was disapproval or disbelief. To acknowledge it would mean I cared what he thought and I didn’t.

At least in that moment I didn’t think I did. It wasn’t until the clean-up committee meeting when I glanced up from my notebook and saw Zach walking in, talking with Vicky and Tanya and laughing at what Tanya said that I realized. I definitely cared.

Tanya was talking about the environment and how amazing the committee was, touching Zach’s arm at every chance she got. It wasn’t until I saw the infatuated glance she gave him and saw his ears perk up like a dog having a shiny new toy that it clicked.

Tanya might have cared about the environment, but not as much as she craved Zach’s attention. Too bad for her she wasn’t his type.

First off she was a redhead—he preferred brunettes—and secondly, he liked girls who were laid-back and fun. Who could sit and play video games with him on a Saturday night. That was not Tanya.

I was tempted to blow her cover—it was only right for Zach to know the game she was playing. Instead, I bit my tongue. Hard.

Getting through my monthly progress report had never been so vomit-inducing. Seriously, the girl had no shame flaunting her interest. I couldn’t get out of the classroom fast enough.

* * *

Later on at the beach, I was eager to catch up with Zach, feel him out, and see what his reaction to Tanya earlier actually meant.

I spotted him, back bent as he picked up something from the sand. I muttered a lame excuse to get away from Professor Mulligan and headed down the beach to him.

“How’s Mimi?” I asked as I approached.

Zach straightened his back and turned to me. “She’s good today.” His dark eyes lightened, his lips curved up and he flashed me a smile.

I shifted my weight from one foot to the other. “That’s great.” I forced my eyes away from him and focused on the seagull flying above.

It was awkward. After treating him the way I did then finding out why he was here, I felt guilty. It was weighing heavy on my mind. I wanted to explain that I didn’t mean to be so awful, but how could I do that without bringing up the past?

The past was just that—the past. I was sick of living it. Zach went pumpkin picking because Josh invited him. Because despite everything that happened between Zach and I, he and Josh were still friends. And even when Zach uttered those stupid words in my ears, it wasn’t the first time he quoted a movie. He just happened to pick the one quote I never forgot.

All the time I thought Zach was trying to ruin my life, it was really just a figment of my imagination. He wasn’t trying to ruin anything. He was just trying to go on with his life. He’d moved on and it was time I did the same. There was no use dwelling on what had happened because no matter how much I dwelled and no matter how many times I analyzed every little detail the outcome would always be the same. Time changed us and we were different.

It was time for a clean slate. To fix the mistakes I made when he first showed up on campus and stepped back into my life.

“Za . . .”

“Li . . .”

“You go first,” I said and tucked a strand of hair behind my ear. Warm tingles ran through me as I remembered Zach’s hand doing the same thing at the pumpkin field.

“No, you go. Ladies first.”

Always the gentleman. “I . . . uh . . .” I looked up only to be met by a raised eyebrow. “I’m glad you’re here.”

What! Where did that come from?

His eyes sparkled with pleasure as he gave me a cocky grin and said, “Me too.” Then his grin slowly faded, the playfulness no longer visible. My body froze under the intensity. I saw the passion I once knew creep into his expression, and I should have pulled away.

I didn’t.

The way he looked at me was like no one else ever had. His eyes zeroed in on mine, then made their way down my body. My face flushed, and when his eyes came back to mine I nearly melted into the sand. I should have walked away. But it wasn’t just any guy. It was Zach.

I leaned closer, wanting, needing to feel his touch, to have his fingers run along my jaw and pull me close so I could smell his scent. As if he could read my mind he moved towards me. His hand stroked my arm, leaving a trail of goose bumps. His fingers moved from my arm up to my neck, and when he rested his hand under my chin, my entire body was tingling.

Familiar warmth flowed through me as he gently tilted my head up. Words couldn’t save me. All of my emotions were on display, making me vulnerable in the worst way.

“Lizzie.”

I didn’t correct him. I wanted to know what he was going to say.

Needed to know.

His eyes darkened, making the conflict in his mind visible. He was thinking of holding back. I couldn’t let him. For over a year I’d hoped to get a peek into his thoughts, to know everything that was running through his head.

I turned my cheek into the hand holding my chin and rubbed against it. He let go and ran his hand up my jaw. Heat built inside of me and I felt like I was on the verge of disintegrating.

For a long time he studied me, his thumb stroking my cheek. “I—”

“Help!” The scream of distress knocked me out of my trance. Zach’s hand slid from my face, and panicked shouts echoed through my ears.

Zach bolted. He stripped his shirt off mid-stride and grabbed at his sneakers as he ran to where the waves met the shoreline.

A large wave swelled onto the sand and Zach dove in. Tanya was flailing in the distance, water flying, arms flopping. Her face was twisted in fear and desperation, strands of red curls covering it as each wave pulled her farther away.

“She can’t swim well!” Vicky screeched.

Professor Mulligan ran across the beach, hands frantically reaching into her pocket. She retrieved her cell phone and dialed.

We made it to Vicky at the same time. Tears were streaming down her face and her body was shaking. I should’ve comforted her in some way, but my eyes were too focused on Zach and the giant wave crashing down on his head.

I sucked in a gasp, but he quickly sprang back to the surface.

“Please help!” Professor Mulligan said into the phone. “There are two students caught in the surf. Yes. Harrison Beach. Thank you. Please hurry.” I gave her credit for keeping it calm. If the fear hadn’t paralyzed me, I would’ve been screaming.

The rest of the committee had joined us, eyes glued to Tanya and Zach.

“It’s going to be okay,” Professor Mulligan said to Vicky.

How did she know that? Zach was a good swimmer, I remembered that much. But the riptide was strong and every time he gained an inch he lost two.

Oh God! What if he didn’t come out? What if he was washed away? A shudder racked my body, but I closed my eyes, pushing away all thoughts of Zach dead on the beach out of my mind.

“She saw a plastic bag by the water and went to grab it,” Vicky choked out. “I told her not to. And then a wave crashed down and pulled her in.” Professor Mulligan rested her hands on Vicky’s shoulders, her gaze never once leaving the two bobbing bodies in the water.