Shannon Stacey - Mistletoe & Margaritas

And he already wanted to.

Since she already had everything on the table, he took his seat and dug in. They’d burned more than a few calories before falling asleep. But, hungry as he was, he wasn’t so intent on his breakfast he missed the fact she was avoiding eye contact. In his experience, when a woman you’d spent the night with wouldn’t look you in the eye, she either had a bellyful of regret or you sucked in the sack. Or so he’d heard.

“I guess I should thank you.”

He paused with a forkful of home fries halfway to his mouth. That was an odd thing to say. “Thank me for what?”

“You know…for last night.”

“Then I have to thank you, too, because it was mutually amazing. I think. I…hope.” Before he’d been sure it had been just as good for her as it had been for him, but now he was sitting across from a woman who didn’t look like she’d had her socks knocked off between the sheets.

“It was!” She said it a little too quickly for his taste. “It was definitely amazing. And that’s why I said thank you.”

“Okay. You’re welcome, I guess.” He couldn’t shake the feeling he was missing something in this conversation.

“It meant a lot to me to…test the waters, so to speak, with a guy I trust so much.” She took a deep breath and smiled at him. “You’re a good friend.”

Oh, hell no. He was…what? A test drive to make sure all her parts were in working order before she went on a real date? “Tell me you didn’t just say that.”

“You are a good friend.” She looked confused. “You’re my best friend.”

“If you want a buddy, get a golden retriever,” he muttered, and then he shoved the home fries into his mouth to shut himself up.

Claire dropped her fork onto her plate with a clatter. “I knew it. This is why friends shouldn’t have sex. Now it’s going to be weird.”

“No, you thanking me like I gave you a tire and lube job so you can go on a road trip is making it weird.” As he watched her expression change to one of restrained amusement, he replayed his words in his mind and groaned. “You know what I mean.”

“Lube job isn’t the sexiest euphemism I’ve ever heard,” she said, her voice heavy with suppressed laughter. “But you did give me one helluva tune-up.”

He laughed and then shook his head. “Wise ass.”

With amusement written all over her face, Claire dug into her breakfast, so he followed suit. But, as the food slowly disappeared, the tension grew thick again.

Pretty soon it would be time for him to go and he had no idea where they stood. Was she even expecting him to go or was he supposed to spend the day with her? And, if he went, did he kiss her goodbye?

The only thing he knew for sure was that he’d made one hell of a mess of things.

He was swallowing the last bite of his veggie omelet when she said softly, “Did I wreck everything? Is it going to stay weird now?”

“You didn’t wreck anything.” Except maybe him, since there was something that sounded a lot like regret in her voice.

“I haven’t been with anybody since Brendan.” She wouldn’t look at him, concentrating instead on moving a mushroom around her plate. “I just wanted to…I just…I shouldn’t have put you in that position.”

“Hey, that happened to be my favorite position.”

She rewarded him with a laugh, but it was a quick one and then she grew serious again. “I mean it. You were Brendan’s best friend. You’re my best friend. It was wrong of me to throw myself at you because I was a little lonely at night. Your friendship means everything to me and I just hope I didn’t screw it up.”

He forced himself to look her straight in the eye. “Our friendship means more to me than anything, Claire. You know that. And I shouldn’t have let it happen. You were my buddy’s girl and that makes you off-limits. It won’t ever happen again.”

“Let’s chalk it up to too much to drink.” She was full of crap and they both knew it. He’d seen her drunk before and she was nowhere near plastered last night. And neither was he. “Forget it ever happened.”

Forget what was seared into his very soul? Not freakin’ likely. He suspected when he was ninety years old and couldn’t remember where he’d left his teeth, he’d still remember the jolt of her blue eyes looking into his and the whisper of his name on her lips as he moved inside her. “Forget what ever happened?”

She grinned and the world felt mostly okay again.

By the time they’d cleaned up the breakfast dishes and put everything away, the awkwardness between them was almost gone. She went on and on about Christmas and shopping and what she wanted to buy for Nicole now that she was old enough to really get a kick out of the holiday. He said the right words in the appropriate places, but his mind refused to concentrate on the mostly one-sided conversation.

He’d managed to royally put the screws to himself this time, and there was no way out of it.

If he walked away from her, she’d not only be hurt, but she’d probably blame herself for not going to bed-alone-when he told her to. He couldn’t bring himself to do that to her. But if wanting her and not being able to have her was hard before, now it was going to be downright torture. Now he’d know without a doubt what he’d be missing.

He’d deal with it, though, for Claire’s sake. Even if it killed him.

Claire was doing nothing much but alternating between staring at the row of photos on her bookshelf and glaring at the stupid sprig of mistletoe when Penny showed up Tuesday afternoon with the timecards for payroll. She stood in the kitchen to take off her snowy coat and boots, but did a double take when she saw Claire.

“The Sandman delete you from his GPS or what?”

Always nice to know the lack of sleep was that visible on her face. “Rough couple of nights, I guess.”

“It’s really coming down out there.”

Which meant Justin would be out plowing and he hadn’t called her. Maybe it was because he knew she had a standing appointment with Penny. Or maybe it was because, since Sunday, he’d had more time to think about the night they’d spent together and he was putting some distance between them.

She knew all she had done was think about it. Mostly while she was supposed to be sleeping. At the time, she’d tried to chalk it up to a raging case of libido neglect meeting being dosed with a steady flow of cranberry margaritas, but she was going to have to face facts. Any guy who knew his way around the female body wouldn’t do. The need that was building all over again and making her toss and turn at night was definitely Justin-specific.

“I can’t stay and chat today,” Penny said. “Dentist. But call me later if you want to talk. You look like you need a shoulder. Or a drink.”

“Last thing I need is a drink.”

That got Penny’s attention and she looked at her watch. “You have three minutes to tell me what alcohol made you do. And who it made you do it with.”

She didn’t need three minutes. She didn’t even need three seconds. “I got waylaid by a migraine, that’s all. And alcohol doesn’t help.”

Penny would probably be hurt to know Claire was lying to her, but she didn’t think Justin wanted their business to become the latest fertilizer for the town grapevine. And neither did she.

“No offense, Claire, but that’s boring as hell. You need to go out and have a good time.” She shoved her feet back into her boots. “How’s the migraine now?”

“Better. Just need to catch up on my sleep now.”

She tried, after Penny left. Curling up on the couch with Moxie, Claire tried to nap, but she could see the snowflakes falling outside the window and they made her think of Justin. Then she heard the big state plow truck go by and made herself close her eyes.

If the town and the state were out plowing, so was Justin and she couldn’t stop herself from wondering if he’d stop by, looking for food-since he wouldn’t make pool and pizza night-or a power nap. Or maybe some company if he hadn’t been lying about their friendship still being solid.

It was dusk when she woke to Moxie knitting her claws in her sweatshirt and the sound of somebody rummaging around in her fridge. For a long moment she just lay there, soaking up the normalcy. Then Moxie jumped down and sauntered over to figure-eight her way around Justin’s ankles and she knew the jig was up.

“I stopped at that deli you like and got a couple of turkey bulkies and a bucket of German potato salad. Are you out of mustard?”

“There’s a new one in the cabinet.” She sat up and tried to rub the lingering sleep from her eyes. “You should have called. I would have had everything ready.”

“By the time I thought of it, I was almost here.”

She went into the bathroom and when she emerged, he had everything spread out on the table so all she had to do was sit. “Has the snow let up any?”

“It’s winding down. After I eat, I’ll probably make another quick pass for clients who have to get in or out before eight o’clock or so tomorrow morning and I’ll do the rest then.”

She nodded and took a bite of her bulky, shuddering a little as he drizzled mustard over the top of his potato salad.

Justin paused with his first forkful halfway to his mouth, looking at her. “You gonna ride with me tonight?”

“Sure.” There, that was casual and to the point. Not even a hint of the insane relief she felt at this small sign they were back on track.

And that was good, even if the track was going to have a few more potholes in it than it had before. All she had to do was pretend she’d forgotten the night they’d spent together and never thought about how amazing and wonderful the sex had been between them.

If she lied to herself-and to him-long enough, maybe someday it would become the truth.