Rafe just bet she did.

Rafe hopped into the SUV just as Cam took off. Laura had taken the passenger seat, leaving him in the back. He leaned forward, trying to force his way into her space. “What was that about? You can’t go on television.”

Her stony face stared back at him. “Sure I can. It’s what they want. It puts a huge target on me.”

“You already have a target on your back,” Cam pointed out, his voice tight with tension.

“It will be a beacon when I’m done with that interview,” Laura replied.

Rafe could just guess what she was going to do. She was going to get on TV and taunt the Marquis de Sade. She would know exactly what to say to get his rage going. By the time she was done, there would be no question about him coming after her. It was everything those fuckers would want. “I forbid it.”

“You can’t forbid anything, Rafe.”

He chose to ignore her. “How fast can we be in Vegas, Cam?” Laura turned, her face marred by a nasty frown. “We are not going to Vegas.”

“If I break speed limits, I can get us there in ten hours,” Cam said.

He paused at the street as though trying to make the decision.

Laura stared at Cam. “If you want me to run again, this is the way to do it.”

Cam turned toward her cabin. Pussy. As if he could hear Rafe’s thoughts, his eyes pleaded through the rearview mirror. “What am I supposed to do? We can’t make her marry us.” Rafe didn’t see why not. “I can think of several ways.”

“It’s not happening, Rafe,” Laura said, a stubborn set to her chin.

“You’re going to drop me off at my place, and then you can leave.

Both of you.”

Cam turned to her. “I’m not going anywhere, I told you that. I told you that you couldn’t get rid of me. For god’s sake, Laura, we made love not an hour ago.”

“We had sex,” she shot back.

“You told me you loved me.”

Rafe sat, wishing he’d had the chance to pull her in back with him. He could see plainly what she was doing. He dearly wished he’d done more than ruined Brad Conrad’s face. By showing her those photos and playing on her guilt, Brad had undone all the progress he and Cam had made with Laura. Brad had shoved her back into that place where she was alone and helpless.

Rafe wasn’t about to let her stay there. “Can I finish this conversation for you, bella? I know precisely how it is going to go.

Now you’re going to tell Cam that you didn’t mean it. You’re going to tell him that making love in the Sheriff’s Office meant nothing.

You were just telling him what he wanted to hear because he was being unreasonable. Cam is going to get hurt and sit there in sullen silence while you turn to me and tell me the same thing. You’re going to lay down the law. You’re going to push us both out by telling us you never really loved us and you like your life here without us.

You’re going to tell us to go home and forget about you. Am I close?” She crossed her arms over her chest. “Well, I was going to curse more.”

Yes, she probably would have. Rafe shook his head. “You’re being a self-sacrificing idiot.”

“Is this about the case?” Cam asked, clearly confused.

“No,” Rafe replied. “It’s far more than the case.” He couldn’t forget the haunted look on Laura’s face as she’d told him they didn’t need to use a condom. “She’s feeling guilty about a lot of things.

She’s feeling the weight of those women’s deaths. She’s also feeling unworthy. She loves us. She just doesn’t know how to be with us.”

“That is such bullshit,” Laura shot back. “I think I know how to be with you, Rafe. I just have to let you pin me to the nearest flat surface.

That’s all you require.”

She wasn’t going to get to him that easily. “I don’t require a surface at all, bella. When I want you, I’ll simply lift that skirt, pick you up, and impale you on my cock.”

Cam shook his head. “Yeah, baby, I can totally do it standing up.” Rafe couldn’t miss the way her fists clenched in her lap as Laura replied. “There’s more to a relationship than just sex.”

He wanted to hold her, to touch her, but he held off. “Yes, there’s far more. There’s also more to a marriage than giving birth to children.”

She flushed, her delicate skin turning pink in a heartbeat.

Cam stopped the car in the middle of the road. “She thinks we don’t want her because she can’t have kids?”

“I believe Laura is seeing herself as the noose that’s going to take us both down.”

Cam turned back to the road and started driving again. “You’re right—she’s being an idiot.”

“You’ve both quit your jobs for me,” Laura said, though a little of the sass had left her voice.

“I never liked it much anyway,” Cam said flippantly. “I was only there for the nookie, and when you walked away, that dried up.” She slapped a hand on the dashboard. “This is serious, damn it.” Cam shrugged as he sped up. “I am serious. I would have quit that job a long time ago if it hadn’t been for you and Rafe. I’m not like some of these guys. I don’t want to be knee-deep in bodies. It drags on me. I like programming. I liked building the program that found you. I’m going to stay here in Bliss and work my job and come home, and after I fuck you into submission, I’ll work on my facial recognition program.”

“You are not staying with me.”

“So, throw me out,” Cam challenged. “When you can pick me up and toss me out, I’ll sit in your doorway until you let me back in.”

“I won’t,” Rafe vowed. “I’ll slip back in again and again.”

“Damn it, Rafe,” she hissed under her breath. “Be reasonable. Go back to Joe and get your job back. You know he’ll take you back in a heartbeat. Cam might not have loved the Bureau, but you’re a lifer, and you know it. You relish that job. It’s everything you worked for.” He had loved the job, but he loved Laura more. The job he’d spent his whole life preparing for had just threatened to chew up and spit out the only woman he’d ever loved. In the end, there was a choice to be made. He wouldn’t love the Bureau with his whole heart. He wouldn’t cuddle the fucking Bureau at night. The Bureau wouldn’t grow old with him. “I’m not going back, Laura. I don’t know what I’ll do from here, but I can’t go back.”

“That is insane, Rafe,” Laura said.

“Why? Didn’t you walk away from a life that you thought didn’t work for you anymore? That’s what I’m doing. I’m walking away.

The world is a big place. When one thing stops working, you walk out and find something else. As long as I have you, I’ll be fine.” She shook her head. “No. You don’t have me. I won’t do this. I won’t be the reason you lose your job and your family. What would your mother say? Or are you asking me to choose between you and Cam again?”

He knew she was making a certain amount of sense, but his sense had been tossed out a long time ago. There were a hundred things wrong about this relationship, but only one thing mattered. He loved her. “My mother can choose to accept me as I am, or she can stop talking to me. I will still love her. I will still try to take care of her. I can’t force her to respond the way I want. I can only be responsible for my own actions. I can’t fix the outside world, bella. I can only promise to make our little world as perfect as I can.”

“You won’t be happy.” She turned and stared out the window.

“Don’t tell me how I’ll feel,” Rafe shot back. “I know how I have felt for the last five years. Broken and useless.” He’d been missing a piece of his soul since the day she’d walked away. His badge, his job, his family meant nothing if he couldn’t get her back. He loved his mother, but Laura was his soul. If there was a choice to be made, he’d made it the minute he quit the Bureau.

Frustration welled up inside Rafe. Just a few hours ago, he’d been deep inside her. Now he felt her pulling away.

She turned from him, her eyes shifting to the road ahead. “You get over it, you know. That broken, useless feeling won’t last forever.

You find something else to love, and you move on. You make a better life.”

Every word from her mouth made his heart ache. “And you found a better life.”

“I found this place. I love my friends. Do you know how long it took me to let one in? It was years. Nell was such a little flake. She was one of the first people I met here. She made me zucchini bread. I took one look at her and decided that little idiot was safe. She wasn’t smart enough to hurt me.” Rafe could hear the tears in Laura’s voice.

“I love her. God, I love her. I wouldn’t have given her the time of day when I was in DC. She would have been an amusing airhead, but I have learned more about truly loving the people around me from Nell than I could have imagined. She believes in so much more than I can.

And Holly. Holly will do anything for a friend, but I rebuffed her for years because I wasn’t going to let another Jana get her hooks in me. I broke my foot one winter. Holly ran out of her cabin, and she got me to the hospital in Del Norte, and she brought me home and fed me.

She worked my shift for a week so I didn’t lose my job. I hadn’t done anything for her. I had been nothing but cold.”

“She saw the real you,” Cam said quietly.

“I don’t know that I knew the real me until I came here. I don’t know that I would be this me if I went someplace else. Maybe part of figuring out who we are is finding a place to call home. What I’m trying to say is that it was hard, but I got over it. I’m happy here.

You’ll be happy one day, Rafe. One day you’ll wake up, and your kids will jump all over you, and you’ll go to work as the special agent in charge, and your mom will be so proud. You’ll look back, and I’ll just be this memory. You’ll thank me.” His hands were shaking. He had the sudden realization that this wasn’t going to go the way he had planned. She wasn’t going to give in because he kissed her senseless. “I won’t. If you really won’t take me, I won’t thank you, bella. I could handle it if I thought I wasn’t the best man for you. Hell, I’m willing to share you because I know you need Cam, too. If you won’t accept me, my life won’t be filled with kids and this great career. It’ll be filled with regret because I know why you’re really rejecting me. You can’t forgive me. You can’t put what happened behind you.”