She drank the coffee where she stood, and was pouring a second cup when she heard Jordans footsteps.
Hed pulled on his clothes, but still looked sleepily rumpled. He grunted when Moes paws hit his chest, and managed to nip the coffee mug out of Danas hand. He drank deep.
“Thanks.” He handed it back, then stooped to pick up Moes leash. The act had Moe running around them in desperate circles.
“Want me to take him out?”
“Yes. You can take him back to Flynns.”
“Sure. Want to go for a run before breakfast?” he said to Moe as he clipped on the leash. “Yeah, you bet.”
“I dont want you to come back here.”
“Hmm?” He glanced up, saw her face. “What did you say?”
“I dont want you to come back here. Not this morning, not ever.”
“Down, Moe.” Something in the quiet tone had the dog obeying. “Did I sleep through an argument, or… Kane,” he said and gripped Danas arm. “What did he do?”
“It has nothing to do with him. Its about me this time. I made a mistake letting you back in. Im correcting it.”
“What the hell brought this on? Last night—”
“We have great sex.” She shrugged, sipped her coffee. “Thats not enough for me. Or maybe its too much for me. Either way it doesnt work. You ripped me to pieces once.”
“Dana, let me—”
“No, thats just it.” She stepped back from him. “I wont let you, not again. Ive got a good life, all in all. It satisfies me. I dont want you in it. I dont want you here, Jordan. I cant have you here. So Im telling you to go while there are no hard feelings. Im telling you while we still have some chance of being friends.”
She moved past him quickly. “Im going to shower. Dont be here when I come out.”
HE was still in a daze when he walked into Flynns. Was this what shed felt like? he wondered. Was this what hed done to her? Had he left her feeling hollowed out and numb?
And what happened when the numbness passed? Was it pain, or anger, or both?
He wanted the anger. Christ, he wanted to find his anger.
Trailing the leash that Jordan forgot to unclip, Moe dashed back toward the kitchen, and Flynns cheerful greeting followed the sound of thumps.
“A boy and his dog.” Malory jogged down the stairs, morning fresh in khakis and a navy sweatshirt. “Youre back early this morning,” she began, “or Im running behind.” Then she stopped, stared at him. “What is it? Whats wrong?” A bubble of fear came into her voice. “Dana—”
“No, nothing. Shes fine.”
“But youre not. Come on. Lets go sit down.”
“No, I need to—”
“Sit down,” she repeated, and taking his arm, pulled him toward the kitchen.
Flynn was at the card table, a temporary measure in the evolving kitchen. The walls had been painted a strong teal blue that set off the golden wood of the new cabinets. The floor was stripped down in preparation for the hardwood Malory had selected. A piece of plywood sat on a stretch of base cabinets as a makeshift countertop.
Flynn was eating cereal, and from the guilty look on both his and his dogs faces, hed been sharing it with Moe.
“Hey, whats up? You want food, youve got about fifteen minutes before the crew gets here.”
“Sit down, Jordan. Ill get you some coffee.”
Flynn studied his friends face. “Whats the deal? You and Dana have a fight?”
“No, no fight. She just told me to go.”
“Go where?”
“Flynn.” Malory set a mug of coffee in front of Jordan and laid a hand on his shoulder. “Can you possibly be that dense?”
“Well, Jesus, give me a minute to catch up. If you werent fighting, why did she kick you out?”
“Because she didnt want me there.” “So you just left?” Flynn tossed out. “Without finding out what pissed her off?”
“She wasnt mad. If shed been mad I couldve handled her. Handled it. She just looked… tired, and sad. And finished.” He rubbed his hands over his face,. So it wasnt going to be anger after all, he realized. It was just pain.
“Whatever she felt, Jordan, whatevers behind it, you have to find out.” Malory gave his shoulder a quick shake. “Doesnt she mean anything to you?”
He shot her a look storming with emotions, and with a sigh she moved in to wrap her arms around him. “All right, then,” she murmured. “All right.”
“She means enough,” he managed, “that Im not going to put that look on her face again. She wants me gone, Ill go.”
“Men are such morons. Havent you considered that she wants you gone only because she already expects you to go?”
ZOE met Malory at the front door, then nudged her back out. “Ive been watching for you. Danas in there, painting your side. Somethings wrong. I can see it. But she wont talk about it.”
“She broke up with Jordan.”
“Oh. If theyve had a fight—”
“No, its something else, and nothing as simple as an argument. Im going to see what I can do.”
“Good luck.”Zoe went back in.
“Whats that noise, anyway?”
“Just one more complication. Bradleys over in Danas section with an electric floor sander. He wont let me use it. Yes, it was very nice of him to lend it to us,” she continued when Malory lifted her eyebrows. “But Im perfectly capable of sanding the floors. With him here, its that much harder to get Dana to open up.”
“Keep him busy, Ill deal with Dana.”
“I dont want to keep him busy. The last time I was alone with him for ten minutes, he put the moves on me.”
“Which moves?”
Zoeglanced over her shoulder toward the sound of the sander. “The night we were at his place, after everyone else left. I was having a simple conversation with him, then he kissed me.” “He kissed you? That perverted maniac! Get the rope.”
“Oh, ha, ha.”
“Okay, did you have to fight him off? Was it a scarring experience?”
“No, but…” She lowered her voice, though she could have shouted and not been overheard. “He really kissed me, and my head went wonky for a minute, so I kissed him back. Ive got entirely too much on my plate for fun and games right now. Besides, he makes me nervous.”
“Yeah, great-looking guys who take time out of their day to sand floors for me always make me nervous. Listen, Ive got to talk to Dana. When Ive taken care of her, Ill run over and, if necessary, save you from Brads nefarious clutches. Unless, of course, you dont think you can handle yourself.“
“Okay, that was low. Very low.”
“Just make sure he doesnt wander over while Im talking to Dana. Scoot.” She wavedZoe away, then headed in the opposite direction.
Her first thought was: Oh! Her walls were coming to life with that pale, delicate burnt gold shed chosen. It was right, just so right. Alreadysh & could see what a perfect backdrop it would make for art.
Her second thought was how set and blank Danas face was as she worked.
And that was wrong, just so wrong. “It looks wonderful.”
Obviously jolted out of long thoughts, Dana turned her head. “Yeah. You've got a knack for bull's-eyeing color. I figured this would look bland, even a little dingy. Instead it has this nice, quiet glow.”
“You dont. You dont have any glow at all today.” Dana shrugged, and continued to work. “Cant be Mary Sunshine all the time.”
“I saw Jordan this morning. He wasnt glowing either. In fact,” she continued as she walked to Dana, “he looked devastated.”
“Hell get over it.”
“Do you really think that, or do you need to think it because it gets you off the hook?”
“Im not on any hook.” She stared hard at the wall as she painted. Gold over white, gold over white. “I did what was right for me. Its none of your business, Malory.”
“Yes, it is. I love you. I love Flynn, and he loves you.”
“Were just one big, gooey family.”
“You can be angry with me if you want, if it helps. But you have to know Im on your side. Whatever happens, Im on your side.”
“Then you should understand why I broke things off and you should support my decision.”
“I would, if I thought it was what you really wanted.” Malory rubbed a hand over Danas back. “If it made you happy.”
“Im not looking for happy yet.” Her friends comforting stroke made her want to sit down on the floor and wail. “Ill settle for a little stretch of smooth road.”
“Tell me what happened between yesterday and today.”
“I remembered—with a little help from Kane.”
“I knew it.” As she snapped it out, Malorys face went bright with anger. “I knew he was behind this.”
“Hold on. He took me on a trip down memory lane. That makes him a son of a bitch, but it doesnt change the facts.” God, she was tired. She just wanted to be left alone to paint the walls. Paint away the ache and fatigue. “He didnt change what happened or make it worse. He didnt have to. I just knew that after seeing it again, feeling it again, I was making a mistake.”
“Why is it a mistake to love a decent man?”
“Because he doesnt love me.” She yanked the band out of her hair, as if doing so would relieve the headache simmering at the base of her skull. “Because hes going to leave as soon as hes done here. Because the more Im with him, the deeper in I get, and I cant control how I feel the way I thought I could. I cant be with him and not be in love with him.”
“Did you ask how he felt?”
“No. And you know what? I just wasnt up to hearing the old „I care about you routine. Sue me.”
No one spoke for a moment. There was only the sound of Danas labored breathing, the hum of the paint machine, and the steady buzz of the sander from the other side of the house.
“You hurt him.” Malory stepped over, flicked off the machine. “Maybe his feelings arent as simple and weak as you think. The man I saw this morning had been cut straight down to the bone. If you wanted payback, Dana, you got it.”
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