“What about Anna? Can't she cover for you, so you can come out to California?”

“Not this week. She just worked six days straight on duty and on call. She hasn't seen her kid in days. I told her I'd at least be on call for her through Sunday.”

“So if I'd come, then you might have been busy anyway. Maybe it's just as well I can't do it.” She was making excuses that didn't quite fly with Steven.

“Look, Merrie. I don't care who goes where. I want to see you. The last bulletin I had was that we're still married. And if that's the case, I'd like to see you more than once a month, if that's okay with you.” He was really irritated with her.

“I'll come back next week.” She sounded apologetic as she said it.

“That's what you say every week, and then on Thursdays you call to tell me you have to see customers, or go to Hawaii, or fly a kite with Callan Dow. I don't know what the fuck you're doing out there, but all I know is that I never see you anymore.” He sounded angry and tired and jealous, and she couldn't blame him.

“I'm sorry. I don't know what to say.” She was feeling desperately guilty, and a little frightened by what she was doing. No matter what she felt for Cal, or how good it was, she was risking her marriage and she knew it. She couldn't expect Steve to put up with this forever.

“Never mind, Meredith. I'll see you when I see you. If you come to New York, call me. I have to get back to work now.” He almost hung up on her, and she felt uncomfortable for the rest of the day, thinking about it. But she didn't say anything to Cal. Steve was her problem. And her husband.

She entertained at Fleur de Lys with Cal on Friday night, the Japanese loved French food, and they thought the restaurant was excellent. And on Saturday, they took them to Masa's. Their meetings with them went well, too, and they were enthusiastic about a new system Cal was putting together. Meredith spent all her time with them until they left on Sunday. And when she called Steve that night, he was out, and she drove over to have dinner with Cal and the children. As it turned out, Steve worked all weekend in New York, and if Meredith had been there, he couldn't have seen her. They had another blizzard, and the temperature dropped dramatically. There were sheets of ice on the ground, and Steve said he had never seen as many fractures. He was assisting the orthopods in surgery day and night, and he had four head-ons, which involved children.

He had given Anna the weekend off, but he was thrilled to see her when she finally came in on Sunday evening, and he was still working.

“I hear you had a good time this weekend.” She smiled at him. She had had fun sliding around on the snow on garbage can lids and plastic bags in Central Park with her daughter. “Thanks for the time off. We had a great time.”

“Lucky you,” he growled at her. “Every old lady in New York has been in here with a fractured ass since you left on Friday.”

“I like that diagnosis. Did you tell them that?”

“Yeah. They loved it.” He smiled grudgingly at her. He'd been in a bad mood since Thursday.

“Did Meredith fly in?” she asked casually, wondering if they'd had a fight, or if he'd even seen her. She'd had the feeling lately that things weren't going brilliantly between them.

“No. She had to see customers. Again,” he snapped at her.

“You couldn't have seen her anyway if she had come,” Anna said practically, judging from his workload.

“That's what she said. She could have at least tried.”

“Look, kid. You're both busy. You knew this wouldn't be easy when you let her move, but you thought you'd both have jobs. Now you don't and you're both trying to make the best of it. It's not her fault your job fell through.” She was being reasonable, but it annoyed him that she wasn't as sorry for him as he thought she should be.

“Do you have to rub it in? Or do you just do that for the hell of it?” he snarled at her and shrugged, and then a minute later he apologized for it. “I'm sorry. I had a shit weekend. I haven't slept since Friday night. I'm sick and tired of the bullshit here. I miss my wife. And I get the feeling she never wants to come back here anymore, and it's driving me crazy.”

“So go see her,” Anna said sensibly. “Next Saturday is Valentine's Day. Why don't you surprise her?”

“What if she does the same thing and flies here and I miss her?” He was too tired to work it out in his head, but Anna wasn't. And at heart, despite her blunt words and bad breaks, she was still a romantic.

“So tell her you're on duty and can't see her, and she won't come. Then you fly out, and surprise her … you know, chocolates, roses, the whole Valentine thing. Very romantic. She'll love it.” Anna smiled at him, wishing someone would do the same for her, but there was no one to do it. Hadn't been in years.

“Anna,” he beamed at her happily, “you're a genius.” He made his reservations on the phone that night, and was planning to fly out on Friday at noon when he got off work. With the time difference, he could be in Palo Alto before she left the office. “Thank you,” he said to Anna before he went home to get some sleep, and promised her he'd be back in the morning.

“Just call me Cupid,” she called after him, as she watched him go. He was so tired, he was weaving. She was glad he wasn't driving. She knew he'd take a cab home to the apartment he hadn't let her see yet. She had long since guessed that he didn't want her to feel bad when she saw how luxurious it was. But she knew his wife made a lot of money. He came to see her at her place instead sometimes for a glass of wine, or a burrito when she made them. He and Felicia were pals now, and they both enjoyed the visits.

It was quiet in trauma unit that night, and Anna didn't need to call him for anything. She handled the unit well by herself, and the residents and nurses all liked her. She was still hoping the job would become permanent eventually, but there was no sign of it yet. Steve didn't seem to be going anywhere. And when she thought about it, as she sat in his office that night, she was glad.





Chapter 15

WHAT ARE YOU doing on Saturday?” Cal asked Meredith cryptically on Friday morning.

“Nothing much,” she smiled at him. She knew what day it was, and what he probably had in mind. Saturday was Valentine's Day, and she was staying in California for yet another weekend. Steve had already told her days before that he was working and there was no point in her flying to New York. They had canceled yet another weekend, and it was worrying her that they seemed to be drifting apart so swiftly. It concerned her even more that the life that she was building with Cal was becoming more solid by the minute. They saw each other nearly every night, and he stayed over whenever he could get away with it. She had dinner with him and the kids, and went to basketball games and movies and other places with them, every weekend. She was becoming a fixture. And he was beginning to feel like her husband.

No one at work had spotted anything yet, and they were supremely careful to see that that didn't happen. And his kids didn't seem to have any suspicions either. Everyone seemed to assume that they were the same friends they'd always been since she'd started working for him. But sooner or later she knew that someone might discover them, and then they would have a serious problem. It would hardly have been appropriate for people to know she was cheating on her husband.

“How about dinner at Fleur de Lys tomorrow night?” he suggested casually, and she smiled with pleasure.

“I'd love it.” It seemed odd not to spend Valentine's Day with Steve, and she felt guilty about wanting to be with Cal in San Francisco. But the truth was, she wanted to be with Cal, not Steve, for the time being.

“Why don't you come over and hang out tonight? I'll rent some videos and we can make popcorn,” he suggested.

“Do you want me to bring the videos?” she offered as she put her work into her briefcase. But she seemed to be taking less and less work home on the weekends. She was spending time with him instead, and not really in the mood to do “homework.”

“Sure, you bring the videos. I'll make dinner for us after the kids eat,” he volunteered. It sounded good to both of them, and Meredith tried not to think of what they were doing. They were living a fantasy that felt good now, but it couldn't go on forever, particularly once Steve found a job and moved to California. No matter how they avoided it now, eventually they knew they'd have to face it. But not yet, she told herself. Not yet. What she was sharing with Cal was too sweet to abandon. She knew it was selfish of her but she couldn't bring herself to break it off yet, no matter how guilty she felt about Steven.

“I'll come over in a couple of hours,” she promised. She wanted to take a bath, and relax, and give him some time with his children before she joined him. She didn't want to wear out her welcome with them.

She drove home to the furnished apartment she was still living in. She still hadn't found a house she liked, and she was spending less time working on it. She'd been busy, and as long as Steve was still in New York, she couldn't see the point of living in the city. And she wanted to stay in Palo Alto to be near Cal now. He had told her she could keep the apartment she had for as long as she wanted.

She let herself into her apartment with her key, and as she walked in, she suddenly had an odd feeling. She sensed, more than saw anything different. There was just an eerie feeling as she walked into her living room, and set down her briefcase, and as she did, Steve walked out of her bedroom with a huge bouquet of flowers. She nearly jumped a foot when she saw him. The last thing she expected was to see Steve there.