“I'm sorry, sweetheart,” she told him late Thursday night. She had been in California, and in the job, for four days, and she hadn't caught her breath yet.
“Don't worry about it. Maybe you can look at houses for us over the weekend.” They had agreed that since he'd be working in the East Bay, they would look for houses in the city. They would both have to commute that way, but it was an easier commute for Steve than if they lived in Palo Alto. It would have taken him two hours to get to work that way, which was just too much for him. The city was a good compromise for them, and Meredith had agreed to it.
“I'll look on Sunday,” she promised. And she had every intention of doing it, but by then, she was still buried in work, and sitting with stacks of it on the terrace of her apartment. Cal had invited her to come to dinner the night before, and she refused his offer and ate a sandwich while working. But when he called on Sunday afternoon, having gotten more work done by then, she relented.
She had an early dinner with him and the kids, and this time all of them were fairly pleasant to her. They were getting used to her, and after meeting Steve, even Mary Ellen finally believed that she wasn't their father's girlfriend.
Her second week at Dow Tech was even better than the first, and by midweek she was sure that she could get to New York for the weekend. But this time, it was Steve who called. Harvey Lucas was sick, and he had to cover for him. But Meredith wasn't as disappointed as he was. She had so much to do, she was grateful to be able to stay in Palo Alto again, and get more work done.
“We're not exactly winning gold stars on our commuting, are we?” Steve said, sounding mildly depressed about it. He was busy at work, but he missed her. It was sad coming home to the empty apartment at night, when he finally got off duty, and he felt like a kid who had no one to play with. It had been two weeks since he'd seen her.
But the real crunch came on her third weekend in California. They had promised each other that nothing would stand in their way this time. She had reservations on a flight to New York on Friday night, and on Wednesday Cal learned that customers they were going to entertain on Thursday would be delayed till Friday, and Cal asked her to stay. The customers were important to him.
“I know you were probably planning to go to New York this weekend,” he said apologetically, “but I'd really appreciate it if you'd stay here. Just this one time. I think it might make a big difference to the people and they haven't met you.”
“Of course, Cal,” she said, without hesitating. She knew how important it was to him, and she could see his point, and she hoped Steve would understand. But she was still surprised and upset when he didn't.
“For chrissake, Merrie. It's been three weeks. Is this what it's going to be like for the next two months? When the hell am I going to see you?” For once, he was furious with her, and she was upset that he wasn't more understanding. She also felt a little guilty about not going to New York and it made her defensive.
“I'm not staying out here for a tennis tournament, or my garden club. This is business, baby. I have to be here.”
“Bullshit. Cal can entertain them without you.”
“No, he can't. Or at least he doesn't want to. And I work for him. I can't just walk out when he's asked me to be here. We didn't plan it this way. TIQ is our biggest account.”
“Great. So what am I supposed to do? I have to work Sunday so I can't come out. You knew that.” He sounded angry and disappointed.
“I'll be home next weekend. I swear, scout's honor.” But he was still annoyed when she hung up, and he called back and complained about it again later. He was upset that he hadn't seen her. But there was nothing she could do about it. Business was business.
Cal had hired a caterer to serve them dinner at his home on Friday night, he had invited three other couples, and it was a very pleasant evening. He asked Meredith to come before the other guests arrived, which she did, in a new black cocktail dress that was sleek and sophisticated and very chic, and he looked very pleased when he saw her.
“That's a knockout, Merrie! And so are you.” He briefed her quickly about the other couples, and he knew she had already done extensive reading about the people from TIQ.
And when they arrived, she was a very gracious hostess for him. She moved easily among the guests, talked to the men about business issues, and then spent an appropriate amount of time with the women. But most of them were talking about their children, and Meredith eventually drifted back into the male-generated business conversations. And Cal beamed as he watched her, she was perfect.
When the guests finally left, they all agreed that it had been a wonderful evening, great food, interesting people, and lively conversations. And the man from TIQ seemed to be in love with Merrie.
“You totally snowed him,” Cal said with a look of admiration. “You were terrific. Thank you for staying. I know you were planning to go to New York, but this was important to me.”
“I knew it was,” she said simply.
“Was Steve upset?” he asked, looking concerned and she hesitated.
“A little. But I'll be home next weekend.” But she had realized that it wasn't as easy getting back to New York on weekends as she had thought it would be. But they only had to do it for two more months. It wasn't forever. And Steve had to be understanding about it. She was establishing herself in a new business.
“I'm really sorry,” Cal said sincerely. “Why don't you leave early Friday next weekend?”
“Thanks, I might. I'm going to use this weekend to house-hunt in the city,” she said, as they walked slowly toward her car in his driveway. She was pleased that the evening had gone so well for him.
“Can I come?” he asked unexpectedly.
“It's pretty boring,” she said, and she'd been planning to do some shopping. “You probably want to be with the kids,” she said, as he opened her car door for her.
“As a matter of fact, they're all busy. My chauffeuring services aren't even needed. I'd really love to come with you. I like looking at houses.”
“All right,” she said with a smile, “if you really want to.”
“What time shall I pick you up?”
“How about ten thirty? There's one I want to see at eleven.”
“I'll come by at ten fifteen to be on the safe side. And thanks again for tonight … you were really great,” he said with a warm smile, and a minute later she drove off with a wave, and he was at her apartment building at ten fifteen the next morning, wearing khaki pants, a navy turtleneck, and a blazer, and as usual, he looked very handsome. She was beginning to wonder if he ever looked disheveled. Knowing Cal, it was hard to imagine.
He drove her to the city, as they chatted comfortably, about business, as usual. And the first house they saw was a disappointment. But after that, they saw two others, both of them in Pacific Heights. One needed too much work, though it was a pretty, old house and had great views, and the other seemed a little small to her, although Cal liked it. But she thought it was a little claustrophobic.
“Depends how many kids you plan to have,” he said, as they got back in his car. He had just suggested they have lunch at The Waterfront, they were both starving.
“Very funny. You know I don't want kids, Cal. I have Dow Tech now. That's my new baby.”
“I'm not sure your husband is as clear on that as I am,” he smiled. “He said something about it to me when you two came to dinner, after he'd been swimming with my children.”
“I know,” she said uncomfortably. It was a sore subject. “He keeps pushing, and I think that's part of why he wants to move out here. I just can't see it for me, now more than ever.”
“I think you're just scared, and I still believe in my earlier theory.”
“What? That I'm not committed to Steve? Now that you've met him, how can you say that?”
“I'm not saying you're not committed to him,” he corrected her. “I think you are, as much as anyone ever is. Maybe you don't trust the relationship, or the future.” It was an old theory with him. She had heard it that first week and here it was again.
“After nearly fifteen years, I don't know what's not to trust. He's not going anywhere, and neither am I. I just trust my own instincts. I know myself, and just as you said about Charlotte a long time ago, I'm not very maternal. I think it's a mistake to go against that.”
“Is that what you always agreed on right from the beginning?” he asked, as they headed down Divisadero Street toward the water.
She hesitated before she answered. “Probably not. But I was twenty-three years old when we got married, I'm not sure I knew myself that well then, or understood how much my career would come to mean to me. It takes a while to figure that out,” she said very clearly.
“I know. But there's usually more to it than careers, and I think you know that.”
“I don't know what you mean when you say that, Cal.”
“I've known people who were married to the same people for years, and never had kids, either because they didn't want to, or thought they couldn't, and the next thing you know, they've fallen for someone else, get remarried, and bang, they're pregnant. It's not a new theory. Just the nature of the beast,” he said matter-of-factly.
“Are you saying you think Steve and I will get divorced?” She looked startled by the suggestion. It was something she never even thought of.
“God knows, I hope not. I guess I'm just saying that nothing is predictable in life, and if you look deep enough, I'll bet there are other reasons why you don't want children, not all of them work-related. Maybe you don't think you'd be good parents.”
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