Eliza Jane - In Too Deep

He bustles me to the door, his touch possessive as if telling everyone in the club I’m his. His eyes stay on me, like I’m the most fascinating thing in the room. That has to be my imagination, right?

He’s stays silent on the drive back, looking thoughtful as he concentrates on the road. Once we reach the academy, Colt leads me straight to his bedroom. And I don’t argue. It’s where I want to be too.

He flips on a lamp in the corner and dim light floods the room. I head straight for his bed, my legs feeling shaky. I remove my sandals and lie back on his bed. The room spins when I close my eyes, so I open them again. “I don’t feel so good.”

He’s beside me in an instant, caressing my hair back from my forehead. He leans closer, his spicy cologne making my stomach tingle and presses a kiss to my forehead. “I’ll get you some water. Stay here.”

As if I could move.

He gets me a glass of water and two Tylenol. “Here. Take these.”

I sit up to swallow down the pills and finish the glass of water. The water is refreshing and I begin to feel better, more clear-headed almost instantly. “Thank you.”

“Better?” he asks softly, sitting down next to me.

I nod.

He takes my hand, lacing his fingers with mine. The spark between us hums, definitely still there, I note.

“I’ve missed you,” he whispers, leaning near my ear.

Is he smelling my hair? I shiver. God that’s hot. “I’ve missed you too.” My mouth is working independently of my brain again. Filter, Taylor.

Suddenly he’s kissing me. His lips are on my mouth, his warm palm pressed against my cheek, then he’s tilting my jaw, moving his mouth against my neck, pushing my hair off my shoulders as he ignites a damp, tingling path across my throat. I gasp and grip his shoulders, melting at his touch.

Just as suddenly as he kissed me, he stops. “I’m sorry. I…” He runs his hands through his hair. “I don’t know why I did that.”

I scoot over closer, climbing into his lap. “It’s okay, I want you to.” I run my fingers through his hair. His eyes fall closed at my touch and my heart dances in my chest. This feels so right. I don’t allow myself to think about anything other than Colt, Colt’s touch, Colt’s mouth, Colt’s hips moving against mine.

I hold on tightly around his neck while his hands roam under my shirt. He expertly caresses me, his fingers running across my stomach and ribs, before slowly making his way north with feather-light fingertips.

I let out a ragged moan, and Colt instantly mirrors my response, groaning his desire for me near my ear.

My brain snaps into action. “Wait Colt.” I pull back from his kisses, looking into his eyes. The distance is just enough to clear my head. I pull a few ragged breaths into my lungs, concentrating on what’s happening between us. It strikes me that despite our eager reunion, I don’t know where we stand. “Does this mean we’re back together?”

He moves to my neck, kissing his way to my collarbone. “Of course baby. If you want me still.”

My body clenches, shouting yes! I do want that, but something tugs in the back of my mind. After everything that’s happened, can I trust Colt? And what about McAllister? “Shouldn’t we talk about what we’re going to do about McAll..I mean, your dad?”

He strokes my hair back from my face. “I told you there’s nothing we can do.” He continues kissing my neck. “Shh, baby. No more talking.”

I place my hands on his chest, pushing him back. “Stop.”  Tears spring to my eyes. I realize this is a package deal for me. I need someone who’s strong enough to stand up for me, to fight alongside me. And this – the physical stuff between us isn’t enough. I want more. I’ve always wanted more. “If that’s how you feel…then I need to go.”

“Taylor, wait.” His hand encircles my wrist.

I close my eyes, steeling my nerves. “Let me go.”

He releases my wrist, and I tumble from his bed on shaky legs and make a dash for the door. 

I awake in the morning hung over and feeling awful. Bits and pieces of last night stream into my consciousness. A slow familiar ache spreads through me, like with Wes, but a thousand times worse. Had I truly believed I could tame Colt? I was no one special. Just someone who called him on his bullshit. Something about that realization strikes me – maybe that’s exactly what he needs. Perhaps I am special. But it’s too painful to remember his reaction last night after we kissed. I run my hands over my face. I have no tears left to cry, so I force myself out of bed and into the shower, despite the early hour.  I know what I have to do today.

A short while later I steady myself in front of his door. Regardless of my feelings for Colt, this is the right thing to do. I rehearse the speech in my head one more time. I take a deep breath, then pull open the door to McAllister’s office.

When I enter the office without knocking, McAllister stands.

“What you did was inexcusable. You have no business…”

“I know,” he interrupts, looking tired. Exhausted actually.

I step back, my hands falling from my hips. “You know?”

“Colt talked to me this morning. I understand that you were going to go to the police if I didn’t step aside and hand the company over to him.” He holds up his hands in surrender. “You got what you wanted. He’ll be in charge, and I’ll stay on as a consultant.”

I’m utterly speechless. Colt already spoke to him. It’s then that I notice much of his office is packed up, boxes lying scattered across the room, files open and disorganized on his desk.

“Why are you still here?” he asks after a few tense moments. “You got what you wanted.”

I shake my head. “There’s one more thing.”

He cocks his head, looking at me quizzically.

I know I need to find Colt, to find out why he’s done this, but I can’t bear to face him right now, so I retreat to the safety of my computer lab. I need time to process all this.

So much for being alone. Colt is sitting inside the lab as if he’s waiting for me.

I stop just inside the door. “Hi.”

My hearts pounds looking at this achingly gorgeous guy who I can’t have, who I’m pretty sure no longer wants me. I blush at my behavior last night. Getting drunk with guys I don’t know, going to his bedroom, throwing myself at him, then pushing him off me and storming away like an impulsive child. Meanwhile, he’s talked his father into leaving.

The silence between us is chilling. I wait for him to say something, but he makes no move to speak. He just quietly watches me like I’m the most fascinating thing he’s ever seen. God I wish I knew what he was thinking.

“So are your parents on their way to come collect you?” His voice is cold, unemotional.

“I never actually called them.” I sit down in my usual chair. Between everything with Colt and McAllister and the ship disaster weighing on me, I hadn’t been ready to talk to my mom –or break the news that I was coming home.

“Why not? Seemed like you had your mind made up.”

“I thought I had too, but I still had some unfinished business here.”

He flinches. Yes, he was part of that unfinished business. But was he still? That was the million dollar question. Or actually, two million.

“Speaking of…” I hold up an envelope and hand it to Colt.