Eliza Jane - In Too Deep

But she’s still leaning over me, studying me. So I haven’t completely scared her off. Yet. I lift my hand to her face, trailing my fingers along her jaw. She flinches at my touch, but doesn’t back away. Maybe she’s not as shy as I’ve thought. Our eyes stay locked on each other’s as the seconds tick past. Her face hovers just inches above mine. I want to kiss her again. Bad.

A lock of her hair falls over my cheek, but neither of us moves. She smells enticing and I can’t help but lean closer. She tucks a strand of loose hair behind her ear.

Unable to stop myself, I move my hand to her full mouth to touch those pretty pink lips I’ve been thinking about since last weekend. I trace a fingertip along her mouth, wanting to do so much more.

She sucks in a breath, and pulls away.

Fuck. Too much.

“Sorry,” I whisper hoarsely.

“We should get back,” she says, her voice just as breathless as mine.

I nod. “Yeah.” I need to get out of here. Now. Before I go all caveman and drag her back to my room to satisfy every primal urge she arouses in me.

I walk her inside, all the way upstairs to the girl’s dorm in silence. She grips the banister, and navigates the stairs carefully. She may have had more to drink than I realized. I hang back behind her on the stairs, my hand at the small of her back, ready to catch her if she stumbles.

When we reach the door to the dorm, she steps inside, then stops, realizing I’m no longer following her. If I go into that dorm, she’d stand no chance. I want to taste her lips, to press her soft body against mine, and knowing that I can’t, I stand stiffly by the door. 

Colt’s stopped on the threshold of my dorm, holding himself back intentionally from crossing through the door. I turn to face him. He takes a deep breath, then stretches up, placing his hands on the top of the door frame.

His shirt inches up to expose a patch of skin along with the waistband of his boxer briefs. It is so not fair that the image will be seared into my memory like it’s Christmas morning and he’s a present to be unwrapped.

I need to play it cool. I desperately need to keep my libido in check. Colt is not good for me. I must remember that.

I allow my eyes to briefly travel down his stretched out frame, until I force them to return to his face. He doesn’t let on if he knows I was ogling him like a piece of meat, but his gaze is fixed on me too. He releases a breath slowly, like he’s frustrated about something.

“So you wanna come in?” That is so the alcohol talking.

He peers around me, looking inside, leaning his body closer to mine, though his hands are still gripping the top of the door frame. It’s clear by the silent, darkened dorm that we’re completely alone. My heart thumps unevenly. Even though we’ve already spent time alone on assignment at the hotel, for some reason, this feels different. Like instead of being thrust together, we’re choosing it.

He drops his hands by his sides, then stuffs them in his pockets like he’s unsure what to do with them. “I better not,” he says after a moment of silence.

“I could find some peroxide for your lip.”

He laughs, a deep throaty sound that I can’t help but notice has a bit of an edge to it. He shoves his hands deeper into his pockets, his forearms flexing as he tenses. “I shouldn’t be in here…underage girls…after dark…none of it’s good for me.”

Despite what my brain is telling me, my body has its own agenda. The way my pulse spikes anytime he’s near and my eyes only see his perfection. It’s sorta infuriating. I vowed I’d never put myself in a position to be used by a guy again, and I intend to keep that promise. But in this moment, instead of modesty, self-preservation or general disgust over his man-whoring, my entire body is humming. Damn it.

I know everything MJ and Logan have said about Colt’s reputation is true. I’d heard of at least two girls who’d celebrated their eighteenth birthdays in his bed. And some of it I’ve now seen with my own eyes. It should gross me out, but I can’t make myself feel the way I should about him.

I’m tempted to blurt out that my birthday is only three months away, but I hold my tongue.  Oh God. What’s wrong with me? “I don’t bite,” I say, teasing him right back.

He leans in closer, his voice low. “No?” He looks me over and leans in even closer. “What if I do?”

My stomach drops. His dark eyes on me are too much, and for once I’m at a total and complete loss for words. It’s a strange new sensation to realize that I’m off limits to him, just as much as he is to me, though only a year and a handful of months separate us.

“Thanks for walking me back.” I refuse to play this game his way and throw myself at him like he expects. I turn and head into the darkened dorm, feeling his eyes on my back as I go. There’s no reason why I can’t make him suffer. It’d certainly be a confidence boost to have him salivating over me, only to turn him down. Game on, Mr. Palmer, game on.

When I head to Independent Study, I spot an envelope that’s been left for me at the desk. The typed letter inside tells me my next assignment. I scan the contents and quickly decide McAllister has lost his mind. I don’t know if this assignment is punishment for how I performed on the last one, but either way, I’m annoyed.

I reach for my cell and call McAllister in his office.

He picks up on the first ring.

“Before I agree to this assignment, I need to know more. I need to know it’s not going to end up like the last one – or worse.”

“Hello Taylor. There will be no field work this time, if that’s what you’re asking. The Alliance case involves re-programming the system that guides many of the big tanker ships out on the water today. I want you to see if it’s possible to interfere with the signal and send the ship on a different course.”

“And why would you want to do that? What’s the point?” I promised myself I’d only do these assignments if I felt like I was actually helping put bad guys away.

“As you remember, I’ve given you a full scholarship and kept your secret. You are a student of mine, and therefore, I am testing your skills, exploring what you’re capable of – finding out the ways I’ll be able to use you. And since we both know your first field assignment was a failed one, you’re lucky I’m giving you a second chance at all.”

I swallow down what I really want to say. “And why are we playing with ships?”

“Taylor, do I need to remind you that I’m in charge here, and I don’t answer to my students?”

We’re both quiet for a second, but I can still hear him breathing.

Then he continues. “We’re testing the security. Seeing if it’s hackable. Consider it research for my own personal interest.”

I’m quiet while I consider what he means.

“Either do the assignment, or leave. Your choice.”

He hangs up the phone. I read over the letter in the envelope again. It has the name of a ship. I type it into a search engine, and see it’s a commercial oil tanker sailing in the Atlantic. I run a few searches, trying to find out what might be interesting to McAllister about this ship. I’m stumped. But not finding anything suspicious, I don’t think it’s enough to give up my scholarship, go home and face my parents and Wes.

I lay my head down on the desk in front of me.