“I’m sorry,” he said and backed out of the room.

Meri dressed quickly, then stood in the center of her room, not sure what to do. Last night’s kiss had been upsetting enough. She’d reacted to it with a passion that had stunned her. She’d wanted him, and nothing in her revenge plan was supposed to be about wanting.

She’d tried to convince herself that her reaction had been perfectly natural. Jack was a good-looking guy she liked a lot. She used to have a crush on him. It had been illogical to assume she could seduce him and not get aroused herself. End of story.

But she hadn’t been able to totally believe herself. Now, having seen the need in his eyes, she knew the wanting wasn’t all one-sided.

She left her room and went upstairs to his office. Sure enough, Jack was at his computer, staring at the screen as if it were the only thing that mattered.

“We have to talk,” she said.

“No, we don’t.”

“I’m not leaving. You want me. I saw it in your eyes.”

“I walked in on a beautiful naked woman. It was a biological reaction to a visual stimulus. Nothing more. I would have wanted anyone who fit the description.”

She considered his words. Was he telling the truth? Was that all it was? Biology at work?

“I don’t think so,” she said. “It was more specific than that. You don’t want any woman. You want me.”

He finally looked up from the computer. “I’ve never understood why anyone would bang their head against a wall to make the pain go away, but I do now.”

She smiled. “It’s just part of my charm. Come on, Jack. You want me. Why can’t you admit it?”

He sucked in a breath. She held hers, waiting for the words that would make her want to party like it was 1999.

“I talked to Colin about Betina,” he said instead.

She sank into the chair opposite his desk. All thoughts of wanting and sex disappeared as she leaned forward eagerly. “Really? What did he say?”

“Nothing specific. You’re right-he has a thing for her, but he thinks he’s totally out of her league.”

She groaned. “Of course he does.”

“Why?” Jack asked. “He’s got a lot going for him. He’s smart and he has a good job. He seems nice. He should be like catnip.”

“It’s not that simple. Colin is like me-book-smart, world-stupid. Betina is one of those funny, social people who makes life a party wherever she goes. Colin bonds with the potted plant in the room. Trust me, I’ve been there.”

“You were never that bad.”

“I was worse. I had a wild crush on a guy I could never have. Then he broke my heart.”

Jack looked out the window, then back at her. “I’ve apologized for that. I can’t take it back.”

“I know, but I like punishing you for it over and over again. The point is, being that smart isn’t easy. I always knew I didn’t fit in, and Colin feels the same way. We’re bright enough to see the problem, but we can’t seem to fix it.”

“You’re saying Colin can’t take the steps to tell Betina he’s interested?”

“He won’t see himself as capable.”

“Then maybe they shouldn’t be together.”

“I don’t accept that,” Meri told him. “Colin is a sweetie. And Betina is my best friend. I owe her everything. I want her to be happy. I’m going to make this happen.”

“You shouldn’t get involved.”

“Too late. Thanks for your help.”

“I didn’t help.”

She smiled. “You so did. When we go to their wedding, you can tell everyone how you had a hand in getting them together.”

He groaned. “Or you could just shoot me now.”

“Where’s the fun in that?”

Six

“I have happy news,” Meri told Betina that afternoon when they’d finished working for the day.

Betina glanced out the kitchen window to where the rest of the team had walked down to the water. “You’re giving up your ridiculous quest to sleep with Jack?”

“Never that,” Meri told her. “I’m actually getting closer by the day. He’s weak with desire. I’m sure you’ve noticed him limping.”

“You’re a nut.”

“Maybe, but I’m a nut with fabulous news about Colin. He likes you.”

Betina had traveled the world, dated a European prince and had a very wealthy sheik invite her into his harem. She had a tattoo, knew how to do henna and had explained the intricacies of sex to Meri in such detail that her first time had been a breeze. But she’d never once, in all the years Meri had known her, blushed.

Betina ducked her head. “I don’t think so.”

“He does. He talked to Jack about you. He thinks you’re great. He’s just lacking in confidence. But you have enough confidence for two people, so you’re a perfect match.”

Betina raised her head. “You dragged Jack into this?”

“I didn’t drag him. He wanted to help. Sort of. That’s so not the point. Isn’t this fabulous? Aren’t you happy?”

Betina didn’t look the least bit thrilled. Her friend walked over to the kitchen table and sat down. “I’m not sure I want things to change.”

Meri sank down across from her. “What? Are you crazy? We’re talking about Colin.”

“Exactly. He’s really special. Right now he’s my friend and I can depend on him to always be my friend. If I change that relationship, there’s no going back.”

“Is that a bad thing?”

“I don’t know and neither do you. Meri, there are consequences for everything we do. What if Colin and I don’t hit it off? What if he’s not who I think he is? Then I’ll lose the friendship and have nothing.”

Meri didn’t understand. “I thought you were in love with him.”

“I am. That’s what makes this so hard. I’d rather just be his friend than not have him in my life at all.”

“But you could be more. You could have it all. I don’t understand. You’ve always been a risk taker.”

“Not when something important is on the line. There I’m nothing but a coward.”

This was news, Meri thought, confused by her friend. “I don’t get it. You’re in love with him. There’s a very good chance that he’s in love with you. And yet you’re not going to do anything about it? You’d rather have a skinny piece of pie than the whole thing?”

“It’s better than no pie.”

“But if you don’t try, you’ll always wonder. You’ll have regrets-and, believe me-those are the worst.”

“How would you know?”

Meri smiled sadly. “I grew up the queen of regrets. There were so many things I wanted to do when I was growing up. But I was always afraid. I didn’t fit in and I wasn’t willing to risk being rejected. So I never tried. I was miserable in college, so sure no one would ever want to be my friend. Looking back, I can see a few times when people approached me. But I blew them off. It was easier to be right than to risk. But it was a high price. Like you said, there are always consequences.”

“What are the consequences of sleeping with Jack?” Betina asked.

“So now we’re talking about me?”

“I have more confidence in the subject.”

Meri considered the question. “I finally get to move on with my life. He was my first crush and then he hurt me. I’ve grown up and matured, but I’ve never been able to let him totally go. He’s always lurking in the back of my mind. If I can get over him, I can move on. He’s the reason I’ve never been able to fall in love.”

“I thought you were in love with Andrew.”

Was she? Meri didn’t know what real, adult love felt like. She enjoyed Andrew’s company. She liked being with him. Six months ago she would have said yes, she was pretty sure she was almost in love with him. Today she was less sure.

“I haven’t missed him enough,” she said softly. “I’ve seen him only a couple of times in the past six months. Shouldn’t I be destroyed without him?”

“Nothing about you is normal. Andrew seems like a good guy. You’ll hook up again when you go back to D.C. You can figure out your feelings then. Assuming you’re not in love with Jack.”

What? “No way. I don’t love him. I want to hurt him. I want to make him crawl and beg and then I want to walk away.”

“That’s sure the story,” Betina said calmly. “The one you’ve been telling yourself for years. But is it the truth?” She shrugged. “I have my doubts. I think you’ve never gotten over Jack. I don’t think any of this is about revenge. You can’t accept you still love him so this is the story you tell yourself. But be careful. You’re not into casual relationships. What happens if you sleep with him and then can’t walk away? You want him to break your heart twice?”

In love with Jack? “Never. He can’t hurt me. I won’t let him. He’s little more than a symbol of the issues in my childhood. Once I prove I’ve outgrown him, I can let my past go.”

“An excellent theory. You’ll have to tell me how that works out for you.”

Meri hated her friend’s doubts. Betina was her oracle, the keeper of social and romantic knowledge. They’d never disagreed on anything significant before.

“I have to do this,” Meri said. “I’ve waited too long to walk away now. I have to go for it. You should, too. Tonight.”

Betina laughed. “You’re a brave woman. Braver than me.”

“That’s not true.”

“It is when it comes to matters of the heart. You’re willing to risk it all to get what you want, and I’m not.”

Jack walked into his room that night weary from too many hours at the computer. He pulled the hem of his shirt out of his jeans and started unbuttoning it, only to stop when he heard something in the bathroom.

He turned and saw the door was closed but light shone from underneath. What the hell?

But as quickly as the question formed, it was answered. There was only one person who would be hanging out in his bathroom. Meri.

He hesitated as he tried to figure out the best way to handle the situation. With his luck, she was probably naked. Maybe in the tub. Waiting for him. She’d been doing her best to seduce him, and he hated to admit that she’d done a damn fine job. He was primed and ready. It wouldn’t take much to push him over the edge.