Ann Aguirre - I Want It That Way

“I’m not sure where he is in the program. He’s twenty-four.”

“And still in school?” She tilted her head, puzzled. “Money problems?”

I’d rarely lied to my mother, and I wasn’t about to start now, especially on Thanksgiving. “Not exactly. He’s got a four-year-old. I’m an assistant in Sam’s class at Rainbow Academy.”

She put down her knife and leveled a serious look on me. “Nadia...”

“What?” Wariness prickled over me.

“Unless this is serious, I won’t mention it to your father. It would only agitate him.” She said it like that was the last thing either one of us should ever do. “Honey, be careful. This boy has already gotten some girl pregnant and messed up his future. You can do better. Find someone who can start a family with you when the time is right.”

Clenching my fists, I had the irresistible impulse to defend Ty. It wasn’t like he was irresponsible or careless. She didn’t know him. But since we weren’t serious, there was no point.

“We just hang out now and then,” I said quietly. “I don’t really have time for a relationship, and neither does he.”

“Oh. Well, that’s different. I’m sorry if I sounded unsympathetic. Please don’t let it spoil the day. I just want the best for you.”

“I know.” And I did my best to put her admonition from my mind.

By three, the food was ready, and people started arriving. Rob picked Avery Jacobs up, then Lauren and her mom showed up with a Waldorf salad. Like my mom had requested, sides and salads piled up in the kitchen. Pretty soon the house was full of relatives, friends and neighbors, elderly people who would’ve been alone otherwise. My mom really was a sweetheart.

Avery took a seat on a folding chair nearby, plate balanced primly on her lap. I hadn’t liked her since she ditched me for more popular friends in sixth grade, but if Rob saw something in her, I’d try to be friendly. “So what’re you up to lately?”

“Still working at the bank.” Not the most promising start.

“How long have you and Rob been going out?”

“Three months or so. Around here, he qualifies as a catch.” Though I might be projecting, she seemed to be implying she wouldn’t be with him if she could do better.

It took all my self-control not to smack her. Rather than start trouble, I picked up my plate and went into the kitchen, pretending I wanted seconds, when in fact, I only wanted to get away from her. Rob claimed my seat as soon as I vacated it, and I noticed Lauren watching from her perch on the stairs. With a mental shrug, I joined her.

“Hard to fathom, huh?” With a nudge, I nodded at Rob and Avery.

“I have no idea what he sees in her.” Lauren’s answer came out sharp, spoken through her teeth.

“Eh, he’s a guy. And she’s hot.”

“Rob’s not like that,” Lauren said quietly. “It has to be something else.”

“Who knows?”

My mom called from the kitchen, so I hurried to help out. Later, I ran into Mrs. Barrett, chatting with my dad, and I was astounded at the change in her. When Mr. Barrett left, she kind of fell apart, but since Lauren had been gone, she’d apparently gotten a makeover and pulled things back together.

“Looking good,” I said to Mrs. B.

She turned with a grin. “You’d be surprised at what L’Oréal can do.”

More than that, it was a complete change in bearing and attitude that contributed to the confident package. Lauren had to be ecstatic, seeing proof that even if her dad had broken her mom’s heart, it was possible to come back from it.

The Thanksgiving party was decent, as long as I avoided Avery. Rob didn’t seem to realize she was settling, and I’d never tell him. But I didn’t see this relationship ending anywhere good. She’d always want him to do better, be more, earn more and then bitch at him for being a simple, good guy instead of the overachiever she secretly wanted.

Around seven, I darted into the kitchen, ostensibly to get a drink but really because I just wanted a break from answering the same questions. No, I don’t have a boyfriend. No, I’m still not playing basketball. With a faint sigh, I sank down at the table and poured some wine. I had no intention of eavesdropping, but when Lauren stopped Rob in the dining room, I was trapped.

“You look tired,” she said. “Everything okay?”

It surprised me that she could tell. He didn’t seem shocked by her insight, though. “Yeah. I just have some stuff going on.”

“Awesome or awful?”

“Good. Or it will be, if it pans out.”

Her voice softened. “Keep me posted.”

Their conversation intrigued me, but I couldn’t grill Rob about his dreams or goals without him getting defensive. We kept in touch through occasional emails, but mostly, I sent him music recs because I didn’t know what else to say. Around nine, the party broke up and afterward, I crashed on the couch with my parents in front of the tube. Rob didn’t get home from dropping Avery off until long after I went to my room.

The next day, I went shopping with Lauren, Mrs. Barrett and my mom. Getting to the nearest mall took forty-five minutes, something that didn’t used to bother me. Fortunately, the others talked enough not to notice that I was tetchy. My mother’s comments about Ty still chewed at me, working under my skin.

Yet Lauren shone brighter than I’d seen in weeks, just hanging out with our moms. Mrs. Barrett was hilarious, offering her outfits she’d never wear, and Lauren tried them on, modeling with mock-verve. Shaking the cranky face, I got in the spirit of absurd fashion and accepted my mom’s choice of ruffled fuchsia cocktail explosion. The gown looked hideous on me, accentuating my broad shoulders, so I really resembled a dude in drag.

“This is awesome.” Lauren held her stomach, laughing. “I miss this.”

You live with me. We could do this anytime. Maybe for her, it wasn’t the same without our mothers snapping embarrassing pictures and threatening to save them for posterity. By the time we headed home, my mood had shifted from melancholy to pensive. I really wish I could talk to Ty. He’d been so helpful in regard to Lauren before; possibly I shouldn’t get used to talking about important stuff with him, though. I had no idea where I should draw the line between sex and friendship, how long before I stumbled past what he could accept.

“Penny for them,” Dad said.

“If I made that deal, I’d feel guilty for overcharging you.” Leaning down, I kissed his forehead and went upstairs, simultaneously worn out and wound up.

Shortly after I got in bed, Ty texted. It was almost eleven here, which meant it must be close to one at home.

Can you talk?

Yep. Call me.

My bedroom door was shut, and my phone on vibrate, so it wouldn’t bother anyone else. I picked up on the first buzz.

All desire for serious conversation flew out of my head when he greeted me with, “Hope you’re up for this. Because I’m ready to let you watch.”

“Hang on,” I whispered.

The idea of doing this in my childhood bedroom was even dirtier, but I didn’t protest. Instead, I locked the door then tiptoed back to bed. It seemed unlikely that Mom or Dad would come for a midnight chat, but I’d rather not risk it. Once I was settled, I picked the phone up.

“Still there?”

“Count on it.” His voice in my ear was delicious. Hard to believe we were a thousand miles apart.

“I’ve never done anything like this, so—”

“You just need to install an app. I did some checking and this is the safest. Not that I think you’d turn me into online porn.”

“If you’re nervous, we can just talk.” I didn’t even mean phone sex.

“It’s fine. I want to. I miss you. I’ll text you my account info and you can call me once you get set up.”

“Okay. Talk to you soon.”

I found the app fast, and thankfully, my parents had used the same Wi-Fi password for years. There was essentially no internet on my cell otherwise, and I had only one bar for voice calls. Once I got connected, it didn’t take long to get the software downloaded and installed, then I just had to create an account. While I was doing that, Ty sent his username. I added him as a contact and waited for him to validate. Five minutes later, I clicked the video chat button and waited for him to pick up.

There you are.

I recognized his bedroom right off, but I was more focused on the bashful half smile he was wearing and the shirt he wasn’t. “Hey, you.”

“The things I do for you,” he murmured.

“I’m not sure how this is supposed to go. It sounds hot, but I’ve never—”

“Just tell me what you want to see.”

My breath stuttered as a hot flush washed through me. Yeah, I liked that idea. My voice came out husky. “Sit down. Take your pants off. Show me how you do it when I’m not around.”

“When I’m thinking about you?”

“I hope so.”

“Lately, that’s always,” he said huskily.

This was working for me in a big way, and he hadn’t even done anything yet. “I may play, too, but the camera on my phone isn’t very good.”

“Your face is enough. Just let me see what you’re feeling.”

This face, you show me everything.

“Definitely.”

He moved, stripping like I’d asked and for a few seconds, he was out of sight, and then he settled in bed. The lights were dim enough that it was shadowed and sexy, but I could still see him. I wasn’t sure how it looked on my end, but he was fully, gorgeously on display. No question at all that he was into this. His cock was long and hard, jutting toward his stomach. Licking my lips, I admired the lean slope of his abs and the taut muscles of his splayed thighs.