It didn't help. An uneasy tension in her guts sent the covers flying back, and Dar rolled out of the waterbed and padded off in search. The bathroom was empty, and so was the quiet, dark living room. She stuck her head in the kitchen, then she exhaled, and made her way up the stairs to the second floor. Kerry’s door was partially ajar, and she poked her head in, spotting her lover curled up in the large bed, her arms wrapped around her pillow.

For a long moment, Dar froze, unsure of what to do. Surely Kerry had the right to sleep wherever she wanted to, without being questioned on it, right? Dar nibbled a fingernail, running her mind over the evening’s course, and trying to figure out if she’d done something wrong.


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No. Not unless her understanding of right and wrong when it came to Kerry was way the hell off base. Kerry had been in a very good mood when they’d dropped off to sleep, so...

Just then, the figure on the bed shifted and Dar heard a sharp intake of breath, and a tiny sound of pain. Without further thought, she bolted across the floor and knelt at the bedside, putting a hand on Kerry’s tense arm. ”Hey.”

Green eyes gone silver in the moonlight blinked at her. ”Wh— Oh, Dar, god you startled me.”

”What’s wrong?” Dar asked, softly. ”Are you okay?”

”Oh,” Kerry sighed. ”Yeah...it’s...I’ve got cramps, really, really bad.” She gave Dar a wry look. ”I was expecting it this week, but it just got me a lot worse than usual.” She curled her fingers around Dar’s hand. ”I didn’t want to wake you up.”

”Mm.” Dar gazed at her. ”Sorry about that. Did you take something?”

”Yeah, a handful of Advil,” Kerry muttered. ”They’ll work, eventually.” She reached over and pushed a lock of dark hair out of Dar’s eyes. ”Go back to sleep. I’ll be fine.”

Dar hesitated, finding herself unwilling to leave Kerry, but not having any good reason to stay. ”Um...all right. I guess.” She paused.

”Can I get you something? Hot tea, maybe?”

”No. I’m fine. Really, Dar, go on, you need to get some sleep,”

Kerry told her.

Reluctantly, Dar stood up. ”All right,” she agreed, unhappily. ”Call me if you need anything, okay? I’ve got some muscle relaxants left, if those Advil’s don’t help after a while.” She stroked Kerry’s upper arm in attempted comfort. ”Or maybe a hot water bottle…that usually helps me.”Kerry smiled at her. ”All right, Dr. Roberts,” she teased her companion gently, feeling a little better just to have her nearby. She wished she could just ask Dar to stay with her, but that would be totally irresponsible, since the poor woman had to work tomorrow, and there was no sense in both of them being zombies. Right? ”I’ll call you if I—”

She stopped, seeing the worried look in Dar’s eyes. ”Boy, that’s so stupid.”

”What is?” Her lover knelt again, and rested a forearm on the bed.

”Like I ever stop needing you,” Kerry admitted, with a smile.

Dar’s face, though thrown into shadows, appeared quite pleased with that. ”Actually,” She cleared her throat a little, embarrassed.

”Waking up downstairs was um...” she paused, searching for the proper word. ”Strange.”

”Alone, you mean,” Kerry clarified.

”Mm.” The dark head nodded.

Kerry considered that. ”Big bed.” She indicated the surface she was resting on. ”It’s kinda empty and cold up here,” she added. ”I’d go back Hurricane Watch

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downstairs, but I sort of have to move around a little, because of the pain, and...and I didn’t want to bother you,” she sighed. ”Which is kind of pointless, I realize, because here you are.”

”Right,” Dar agreed. ”Mind some company?”

”No.” Kerry curled up a little tighter as a spasm hit her. ”Ugh.”

A solid weight settled behind her. ”Here,” Dar spoke quietly. ”Let me try something.”

Kerry felt fingers touch her back, and start a slow kneading rhythm down her spine. Maybe it was the warmth, or just Dar’s presence distracting her, but the cramps paused, and seemed to lessen a little, and she stretched her body out to allow her partner better access.

”Ooooo…you have magic fingers.”

Dar chuckled softly. ”No I don’t. I’ve just been here, and done this.

I had to find a way to get rid of the pain before competition, because taking a lot of aspirin when you’re doing contact sports is not a good idea.”

”Really?” Kerry murmured. ”I thought—”

”It’s a blood thinner,” Dar explained. ”I used to get a lot of bruises.”

”Oh.” Kerry nodded. ”Right. That makes sense. They made us use contact analgesic when I was doing gymnastics, but the serious girls played around with the pill so they wouldn’t get it during meets.”

”Mm...yeah, I tried that.” Dar worked her hands lower, getting to the tense knot she could feel right along the end of Kerry’s spine. ”But the stuff made me sick. I had to quit using it.”

”Ummm...” Kerry let her head drop to the pillow. ”You are so good.”

A dark brow lifted saucily, unseen in the murky darkness. ”Oh really?”

”Oh yeah. Your hands are poetry in motion,” Kerry murmured.

”Spreading little bolts of wonderful all over me.”

Dar’s eyes widened at the phrase. ”Little bolts of what?” She leaned over and nibbled Kerry’s ear. ”You’re the poetic one, kiddo.” She rubbed her thumbs in little circles above Kerry’s kidneys, then slid an arm around her waist, and began a slow massage of her belly.

”Ohhh…” Kerry felt the tension slowly relaxing, and she leaned back against Dar’s warm body in utter relief. She wasn’t sure if it was the Advil finally kicking in, or her lover’s attentions, but she frankly really didn’t care, since she’d been tied up in knots for over an hour and a half, and it was just nice to not be in agony for a while. She felt guilty about bothering Dar, but not guilty enough to make her leave, especially since Dar didn’t seem to be minding too much. ”Sorry I wo—

Wait, I didn't wake you up, Dar. What are you doing awake anyway?”

Dar put aside the memory of the nightmare. ”I dunno. I just woke up, maybe the AC clanked or something,” she temporized. ”You weren’t there, but I figured you went to get a drink or whatever. I 306

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couldn’t hear you, so I decided to go see what was going on.” She glanced at the bedside clock. ”It’s almost four. How long have you been up?”Kerry sighed. ”Since two, I was having trouble sleeping anyway.”

She exhaled, blinking a little as the gentle massage continued. ”So I thought it would be better if I just came up here. I usually don’t get it this bad.”

”I know.” Dar pulled her a little closer, and felt Kerry’s body relax against hers. ”You’re one of the luckier ones, doesn’t last long for you, either.”

”Mm… We’re both lucky that way,” Kerry remarked, biting her lip to stifle a yawn. ”Though I was contemplating the other day how choosing an alternative lifestyle ought to bring a magic pill to eliminate this stuff at the same time.”

”Heh, if we advertised that, the one in ten would be two out of three,” Dar snickered. ”Besides, lots of gay women want, and have kids, Kerry.”

The blonde woman sighed. ”Yeah, I know, but they can be selectively fertile, if you know what I mean. They don’t have to worry about accidents.” She couldn’t stifle the yawn this time, and gave into it.

”Mm…think those pills are getting to me now.”

Dar rocked her gently, and watched the pale green eyes flutter closed. ”Good, get some sleep,” she told her lover, as she settled her arms around Kerry’s body, feeling the breathing deepen as she did so.

”Atta girl.”

”Mm,” Kerry mumbled sleepily. ”You’re the best.”

Dar sighed happily, and put her head down, gazing out over her now sleeping companion through the window. The stars winked solemnly at her, and the trees outside swayed in a silent wind, as she reflected on a simple change in her viewpoint.

She’d never wanted to be responsible for anyone. That’s why she’d never considered kids, never gotten a pet. She’d been very, very damn sure she didn’t want the hassle, or the headaches of all that.

So how come taking care of Kerry feels so damn good?

She rested her cheek against the soft, pale hair and peered out at the lapping waves. Tell me it’s a long suppressed, deeply skewed maternal instinct surfacing, right? She glanced down as Kerry stirred a bit, then snuggled closer to her with a contented little sigh. God, what in the hell is happening to me? Dar felt a surge of protectiveness wash over her. I don't even recognize myself anymore.

Another sigh. But is that good, or bad? Dar considered thoughtfully. Well, something that feels this good can't be bad, and not be illegal. So I guess it's good. She yawned, and closed her eyes, letting a peaceful sleep take her.


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KERRY PULLED HER pale blue terrycloth bathrobe around her and sipped at her tea, trying to muster up the energy to go and take a shower. The drugs had worn off after she’d woken, and even taking more wasn’t really helping at the moment. The ache was making her cranky and tired, and she wished she could just crawl back into bed.

”Well, no time for that, Chino. I’d better get moving.”

Bare footsteps made her look up to see Dar ambling into the kitchen, a towel tucked neatly around her damp body. ”Hey.” Dar glanced at her, then put the cup down she’d been reaching for and stepped closer. ”You still feeling lousy?” she inquired.

Kerry shrugged. ”I’m okay, just a little sore. Give me a minute and I’ll get going.” She eased off the stool in the kitchen, then paused, biting back a grimace. ”Jesus.”