Dar's shoulders slumped, as she exhaled in resignation. ”But it’s not true. I swear it, Kerry, I swear it. If I didn’t even know your first name, but I’d worked with you as much as I have, I swear you’re the best choice.” She got up and paced to the French doors, opening them and going outside onto the breeze licked balcony, leaning on it and gazing out over the water.
The soft sound of the waves breaking came to her ears, as Kerry just Hurricane Watch
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lay there, unable to come up with even a ghost of a possible plan, one that would get both of them what they wanted. Or didn’t want, as it happened.
”Okay.” Dar had returned, and was standing in the doorway, arms crossed, jaw shifting lightly as she thought. ”What about this—”
”Dar—”
”Just listen to me, will you?” Dar insisted. ”Just listen a minute.
How about, I don’t fill the position.” She moved forward, holding a hand up. ”I just leave it empty because you’re right, you’ve only been with us for a few months, and frankly, there isn’t anyone in the immediate chain I’d be able to put in there anyway.”
Kerry regarded her warily. ”Yeah?”
”Okay, and you...you can take on a little bit at a time. No, wait...wait…just listen—” Another hand. ”Just try things out, see if you think you can handle things.” She paused, and waited, aware of the cautious, green eyes regarding her now in silence. ”No pressure, you just fill in for me here and there, just to see how you like it.”
”What if I don’t?” Kerry asked, hesitantly.
”Then you stop, and after six or eight months, you’ll know if you can do the job or not. If you can, great. You get it, and by that time you’ll have proven yourself so thoroughly, everyone will be slamming my ass for not promoting you earlier. If you decide you can’t then you can help me pick someone who can.” Dar stopped again, and raised a brow at her. ”What do you think?”
Kerry got up and paced around the area near the bed, her hands behind her in a classic pose, while a sleepy Chino watched curiously from the bed. Finally she stopped, and regarded her lover dourly. ”I think you’re too smart for your own good, Paladar.”
A cautious twinkle appeared. ”So, is that a yes?” Funny how nice that name sounded, coming off those lips.
Kerry ran the idea through her head again a few times, looking for pitfalls. It did make sense, and it gave her an excellent, fairly low pressure way to really find out if she had what it took, without putting herself, or Dar, or their relationship at risk. ”I can just back off at any time?” she questioned closely. ”If I get in over my head?”
”Anytime.” Dar reassured her. ”You just come and say, ‘I can’t do this.’”
Hmm. And by waiting, Dar would defuse the sure charges of nepotism that would start flying. In fact, by not acting immediately, she would put everyone else off balance. ”All right,” she finally said, putting her hands on her hips and exhaling. ”I think I can cope with that.”
Dar’s head cocked gently to one side. ”You sure?”
Kerry’s brows lifted. ”Now you’re asking me that?” she demanded.
”And don’t give me those puppy dog eyes.”
Dar’s gaze dropped guiltily. ”I... Kerry, I don’t want you to think you’re being forced into this. If you really don’t want to do it, just tell 276
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me,” she replied, in a steady voice. ”I mean that.”
The smaller woman let out a breath, then she walked over to where Dar was standing. She felt the soft carpet under her feet, and the cool breeze coming in the open doors. She stopped right next to Dar and looked up. She could see the tension in her lover’s body, and the effort it was taking for Dar to keep a cool, calm facade.
Her choice.
What the hell. Life is short. ”It’s all right.” She put a hand against Dar’s belly, and gave her a tiny, friendly shove. ”I can live with the compromise.” She leaned forward and placed a kiss on Dar’s collarbone. ”I think it’s a really smart idea.”
Dar wrapped her arms around her partner, and pulled her close into a hug, tucking her head in against one shoulder and pressing her lips to the pale hair. ”Thanks.” She felt Kerry’s body shift under the light cotton shirt and press warmly against her, and she rocked them both gently for a few quiet moments.
”Does that mean you’ll be saying yes, then?” Kerry asked finally, in a murmur.
”I guess,” Dar shrugged. ”What the hell. It’ll make for a damn fun meeting tomorrow anyway.”
”Mm.” Kerry listened to her heartbeat for a moment. ”What did your dad have to say?”
Dar laughed a little, then cleared her throat. ”Let me tell yah, rugrat,” she imitated. ”Was a fine thing me walking into the dad blasted govnmet center station, jest to see my kid plastered all over the damn place. Made me spit my coffee halfway to Tampa.”
Kerry burst into giggles. ”Oh god, you sound just like him,” she gasped, thumping her head against Dar’s sturdy frame. ”But,” She quieted, and looked up. ”I bet he was so proud of you, wasn’t he?”
Dar shrugged nonchalantly. ”He’s not much into status stuff.” She dismissed the idea. ”I doubt it.”
”Dar.” Kerry took hold of her lapels and tugged them. ”That is so bogus, and we both know it. I bet he was ready to explode he was so proud of his kid,” she scolded her lover.
A hesitant smile. ”Well, actually he did say he was going around and collecting copies of the paper to find the one with the best picture,”
she admitted sheepishly.
”Why don’t we just give him an original?” Kerry asked gently. ”We can go get your picture taken at one of those places in the mall. I bet he’d like that.”
”No, no, I...” Dar hesitated. ”Only if you’re in it too.” She changed her mind. ”I’d...um... I’d kinda like one of those for my desk.”
A startled, but giddy grin split Kerry’s face. ”You’re on,” she agreed enthusiastically. ”This weekend.”
Dar nodded, apparently satisfied. Then she glanced over her shoulder. ”Hey, it’s a pretty night out, wanna go for a little walk?”
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Chino’s ears perked up at the sound of the word, and Dar smiled at the puppy. ”And you too.”
Kerry chuckled. ”Sure, let me just throw some real clothes on. It’s a little chilly for just a T-shirt.”
”And nothing else,” Dar teased, sliding a hand down her back and giving her a pinch on the behind.
”Eek.” Kerry jumped a little, grabbing for Dar’s fingers. ”No fair!”
”Arf.” Chino sat up and barked a puppy bark at her.
DAR WATCHED THE panes beyond the shutters slowly change from black to a dark gray, heralding the coming dawn. Kerry was sound asleep, her arms and legs wrapped around Dar like a blonde octopus, with her face buried against the taller woman’s shoulder.
Well, she still had a few minutes, anyway. Dar reasoned, as she settled her arms around Kerry’s warm body and exhaled. I could get used to this. She mused, resting her cheek against the soft, blonde hair.
She considered that a moment, listening to her own heartbeat in it’s slow, even rhythm. Who am I kidding? She finally admitted. I am used to it. I’m so used to it I don’t know what I’d do without it anymore.
It seemed so damned strange. She’d been so incredibly self-reliant all her life. She hadn’t depended on anyone for anything for a very, very long time, and now, when you’d think she knew better, here she was willingly becoming dependent on something so intangible as love.
Wasn’t that just the most screwed up thing you ever heard? Dar pulled Kerry a tiny bit closer, and was rewarded by a softly incoherent mumble and a tightening of Kerry’s already snug hold. But it feels so good. Her most self-indulgent, hedonistic instincts whined for attention.
Admit it, Dar. She faced herself. You’ve been starved for this for a damn long time, and now you’re finally getting a good, strong dose of it, no wonder everything’s going crazy in there.
She produced a contented sigh, and gave up worrying about it, turning her thoughts to the coming day instead.
Monday. Her brow creased. Hmm. Monday with her the senior executive in charge. It could be fun.
She wondered if she could get away with firing José. Nah, she decided, probably not, but... A grin. It would be fun to let him think she could. She gave the steadily lightening window a glance, then sighed. Time to get up, and get back into her routine, before her body got used to all this lazing around. With a silent chuckle, Dar stretched, then slowly started to untangle herself from her partner.
”Mm...” Kerry complained softly, tightening her grip. ”No...”
”C’mon, cutie pie. I gotta go pay the piper,” Dar murmured, pausing when she realized what she was saying. Cutie pie? Oh Jesus, Dar. She sighed, as Kerry burrowed closer, letting out a tiny mewling noise. ”Hey...” She patted Kerry’s cheek very softly. ”C’mon now. I 278
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gotta get up.”
An uneven intake of breath, then Kerry opened her eyes dazedly, peering up at her through half lidded and mostly unfocused orbs.
”D...Dar... Wh...”
”Hey...it's okay. I’m going to go run, you go back to sleep,” Dar told her soothingly, as she combed Kerry’s hair back out of her eyes.
Kerry slowly let her go, and rubbed a hand across her face. ”Oh god...I was having this dream...and there were gerbils everywhere. It was so strange,” she murmured, obviously disoriented.
”Gerbils?” Dar repeated, in a puzzled tone.
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