Jennifer Probst - Heart of Steel

     Horrified by her own response, she took a step backward.

     He closed the distance between them. She gazed up and knew he glimpsed every naked emotion she attempted to hide. Confusion. Defiance. Desire.

     He reached out and roughly caught her chin with his hand. His thumb caressed her swollen lips and gently parted the tender flesh as he watched her struggle to contain her body’s reaction. His eyes gleamed with satisfaction, as if he knew what she was feeling and thinking; as if he knew the game would be played by his rules and she was helpless to stop him.

     “Good night, Chandler.” He abruptly released his hold and walked out the door.

     Chandler stood and stared at the closed door. She struggled against a burst of panic threatening to overwhelm her. Logan Grant would not give up until she was in his bed. She’d made a mistake the moment she responded to his first kiss. He sensed a weakness and was going in for the kill.

     Just like any ruthless businessman. Except this time she wouldn’t let him win.

     She gave her bodysuit a firm tug, scooped up the two snifters, and made her way to the kitchen. How long had it been since she let her guard down with a man?

     Chandler cursed her stupidity. She believed in total freedom, and had been careful not to tie herself down to anyone who threatened her lifestyle. She took each moment life offered and enjoyed it to the fullest. But she always shied away from sexual encounters. She enjoyed dating, but when she considered taking the relationship a step further, something within her balked. She never lost sleep over her decision. What she really wanted was a man who set her blood on fire. One who wanted a family. A man whose soul burned for honesty and openness. A man who would make her the most important part of his life.

     A man who was definitely not Logan Grant.

     Chandler undressed as she walked into her bedroom, leaving a trail of clothes on her plush, pale daffodil carpet. She stepped into the shower and let the stinging jets of water soothe her muscles. Her body still tingled from his caresses, and an empty ache throbbed between her thighs. How could she face him Monday and continue as if nothing had happened? She groaned in despair. It would take all of her will power not to blush when she met those charcoal eyes and smug smile. How dare he put her in this position? How could she have let herself respond so wantonly to a man who was practically a stranger?

     She scrubbed her skin until it glowed, hoping to wash away the feeling of his hands on her. She’d never reacted to another man that way. Even when she thought she was madly in love with Michael she never wanted him with the same feverish longing.

     The faint memory tugged at the fringes of her mind. Chandler cringed at the innocence of the girl she’d been, of her foolish dreams of love and romance, and the cruelty of her awakening.

     The floodgates burst open, and a swirling array of images flowed before her. Being introduced to Michael Worthington at one of her father’s business dinners. Overwhelmed by deep blue eyes and golden hair; by her father’s booming acknowledgment that he was a rising star in the company; and by his charming, witty demeanor. He’d escorted her home with Alexander Santell’s blessing. With a brief kiss, he asked her if she’d see him again. She agreed.

     As their courtship continued, she was wined and dined by a handsome man who flashed dazzling smiles and whispered words of love. Suddenly, the pieces of her life fell into place. She’d graduate from college and take her position in her father’s company. She’d marry Michael and have a family.

     And through every step her father would be there, with his silver hair and sharp green eyes, watching and guiding her in the right path as he had done since she was a little girl.

     On the night Michael proposed he presented her with a diamond ring on bended knee. She felt like a princess from a fairy tale, so when his kisses became more insistent she gave herself up to the moment. He led her into the bedroom, and she ignored the tiny seed of warning that flashed to life, chalking it up to nervousness.

     Afterward, he held her in his arms while she cried, telling her it would get better because her virginity made it difficult. When he left he promised they would tell her father the news of their engagement in the morning.

     Chandler stepped out of the shower and wrapped herself in a towel. As she sat on the edge of the lacy Victorian comforter, the years faded away as the memory of her ultimate betrayal played in slow motion before her closed eyes.

     She saw herself arriving at her father’s office, filled with excitement. Breezing past his secretary’s empty desk to the partially closed door. Stopping short as she heard Michael’s voice say her name. Listening in horror to the conversation enfolding, trapped in a nightmare of her own making.

     “It’s all taken care of,” Michael said. He threw a bunch of documents on the desk. “Chandler was ecstatic. I did my part old man, now it’s time you sign the papers.”

     Alexander Santell chuckled. “Not so fast, dear boy. The agreement was the delivery of the contracts after the wedding ceremony. I didn’t hear a set date.”

     “I’ll convince her to speed up the normal process. She’s eager to marry me, and I see no need to wait more than a couple of weeks.”

     “I knew you’d be perfect for her the moment I laid eyes on you, and my daughter’s reaction proved me right.” A booming laugh rang out. The sound echoed and bounced off the paneled walls of his office. “Three months ago I thought the Walterson contract would be impossible to close. The most prestigious investor in the city almost ran for the door when he heard my daughter wasn’t settled down. Can you believe such outdated crap? He actually told me he only felt secure investing in a firm that showed values and stability, which he translated as family.”

     Chandler huddled at the door. Her stomach lurched as Alexander Santell’s words drifted up to her ears. “That’s the first man I’ve dealt with who didn’t care about my profits. He was concerned that if I dropped dead Chandler would inherit control and not have a husband.” Alexander snorted. “As if my daughter needed one.”

     “Then why me?” Michael asked smugly. “If you’d been certain she didn’t need a husband you would’ve convinced Walterson she could handle the company. Instead you offered me a full partnership the moment I put a ring on her finger.”

     “Walterson was impossible to convince. That’s when I decided to introduce you to my daughter.” Alexander lit a cigar and puffed furiously. “Chandler’s a good girl but she's started to stray. All those crazy psychology courses and projects. Books can’t help you in a business deal when you have to go in for the kill.” Silver brows lowered into a frown. “Ever since her momma died when she was young, I promised myself I’d give her something that would last forever. And I’ve succeeded. My daughter was born to run this company and keep the family name alive, even though she may be a bit soft-hearted. I haven’t broken my back all these years just so she could get some notion in her head about finding herself.”

     “I assume Walterson approved of Chandler’s decision?”

     “The man lit up like a Christmas tree when I let him know she was safely engaged. He agreed to sign the contracts after the wedding.”

     Michael sighed. “Chandler’s a bit of a romantic. She wouldn’t have agreed to this marriage if she didn’t think I was in love with her.”

     “You’ll fall in love with her eventually, son. She’s a jewel. But for now a business marriage based on shared values and commitments is nothing to bark at. It’s as good as any nowadays.”

     Michael muttered something under his breath which was overshadowed by her father’s chuckle. Chandler slowly backed away from the door and turned, stumbling down the hall in a daze. She couldn’t remember how she found her way home. She only remembered the feeling of her safe little world ripped to shreds, and the fear of knowing she’d never be the same person again.

     Chandler slid beneath the cool sheets and shivered. When Michael knocked on the door that evening she knew what needed to be done. She remembered his cruelty when she’d given him back the ring; his reminder that her father controlled her life and could force her to marry him.

     The stark truth of his words took her breath away. Michael was right. Her father’s money financed everything. Her job and future was his corporation. She had no other family, no friends, and no one she could depend on. If he ordered her to marry Michael, what could she do?

     Chandler remembered her fear and hatred four years ago. The anger and loneliness at being trapped, forced to play out a role because her father controlled her destiny. Then she’d made the hardest decision of her life.

     She left.

     Chandler flicked out the light and forced back the memories. She’d made a decision to start a new life for herself, one which would never tie her down to another human being like her father. She refused to think of regrets this late in the game. The present seemed enough of a challenge.

     Using one of her techniques to clear her mind, she focused on her breath and consciously let go of any thoughts. Soon, each part of her body relaxed and sank deeper into the pillowed mattress. As she drifted toward sleep she was grateful the last image flickering before her eyes was not Michael.