Hard To Love You

Love - 3

Megan Smith

If you love something. set it free.

If it comes back it's yours.

If it doesn't, it never was.

Richard Bach


Spring Break,

Three Years Earlier...

No one wants to go home for spring break; and we’ve all waited too long to book flights to Cancun, so we’re doing the next best thing. Our best friend’s roommates are having a party tonight and have invited all of us to go. He says the locals stay around for it, like some kind of tradition. I don’t really give a shit where we go as long as it’s out of this god damn dorm room.

I finish my run and head upstairs for a quick shower. By the time I shut off the water I can already hear the thumping of the music. The medicine cabinet starts rattling and the toothbrush holder is about to fall off the sink.

“Come on, let’s go. The party is starting.” Someone bangs on the door.

I dress quickly and hang the towel around my shoulders, grab my basketball shorts, socks and running shoes from the floor and open the door. As I walk down the hallway I pass a few people already making out. Damn, they don’t waste any time. I open the door to the room I’m staying in and throw my dirty clothes and shoes in my bag.

I pick up the key that’s been left for me on the dresser and make sure to lock the door behind me. As I’m making my way downstairs, the front door swings open and two guys wearing football jerseys walk in with a keg on each of their shoulders. A few girls follow them. A blonde catches my attention, she looks a little young but her body is smoking hot. I follow her with my eyes as she moves after the guys into the kitchen.

Perfect. The kitchen is right where I’m heading. I fight my way through the crowd and hear someone calling my name.

“Finally, pretty boy. Took you fucking long enough.”

Before I can respond, I’m being introduced to one of the keg carrying guys.

“This is one of my boys from back home. Dude, this is Logan.”

I lift my head, acknowledging Logan.

“What’s up?” he says.

Someone clears their throat behind him. Logan turns his head toward the blonde and then back to us, “Sorry guys, this is my cousin, Brittany.”

Brittany bats her eyelashes at us. I skim my eyes over the entire length of her body and grin as Logan pours her a cup of beer.

“You go to school around here?” I pluck up the courage to ask.

Brittany’s friend stumbles over before she can respond and practically knocks her right over. I watch the whole show, she’s definitely drunk. Her eyes are glazed over in an inebriated haze. She starts giggling when her eyes connect with mine. “The pool table is free, let’s go.” The girl starts pulling Brittany anyway.

Managing to pull her arm free from her friend’s grasp, she asks, “You guys want to come play?”

My phone starts to ring before I can reply. I pull it from my pocket. Shit! I knew I should have called her before the party started.

I quickly excuse myself and move through the kitchen, slipping through the sliding glass door and sliding my finger across the screen to answer the call.


“Hey, I thought you were coming home for break.” She clips out, more of an accusation than a question.

I sigh heavily into the phone, “No, plans changed, the guys didn’t want to.”

“Alright,” she says so quietly that I barely hear it.

“I’m sorry.”

“I’m sure you are. Hope you have a nice break.” The line goes dead.

Fuck! I feel like a dick.

* * *

A few hours later and everybody at the party is three sheets to the wind. The fucking room is spinning. I’ve got some girl sitting on my lap and we’ve been making out for so long that I’ve lost track of where everyone is.

We finally come up for some air and she asks, “Where are your friends?”

I look around but can’t see shit. Everything is a damn blur. “I have no fucking idea. How about we finish this upstairs in my room?”

She looks around the room we’re in; the revelry is still going strong. These people know how to party. “Alright, but I have to find my friend first,” she says as she untangles herself from me.

I have to adjust myself before I can stand up with any sort of dignity. Some guy is lying on the floor, face down, I nudge him with my foot to see if he’s still alive; he groans and covers his head with his hands.

“Isn’t that your friend over there?” She points to where all my boys are sitting around the kitchen table.

“What’s your name again?” I ask as I scratch my head. I can’t remember shit.

She giggles and shakes her head, “Brittany. You’re really drunk aren’t you?”

I shake my head. Bad move, it feels like someone is pounding on it.

We walk over to the boys and I find an empty seat, I pull Brittany down on my lap and wrap my arms around her. We get dealt into a game of poker, which is a really stupid decision. I can’t pay attention to shit, especially not with her on my lap. I have to keep shifting her over when she lands in just that right spot.

“Babe, if you don’t stop moving that fine little ass of yours I’m gonna have to haul you upstairs.” I tell her.

She laughs.

About an hour or so later, Brittany stands. “I’m taking this guy up to bed.”

I arch my eyebrow at her. Bed my ass.

All the guys start laughing and then cough to cover it up when Brittany glares at them all.

Logan eyes his cousin, “You sure that’s a good idea?”

Brittany rolls her eyes, “Mind your fucking business.”

“Dude, you got condoms in your bag?” My roommate asks.

“Do I ever go anywhere without them?”


Brittany grabs my arms and pulls me away. My friend yells, “Keep that shit on your bed.”

Everyone starts laughing as we walk away. We barely make it to my room before I’m inside her; our clothes were taken off in a fit of drunken lust on the way up here. I remember knocking something over but she’s all over me and I don’t care what it is. I finally manage to get to the bed with her before everything turns hazy.

* * *

I wake up to the sun shining in my eyes. I groan and roll over. “Fuck,” I croak out.

I look around; there’s a blonde girl lying beside me. I kind of remember her from last night but I have no clue what her name is.

I move the hair that’s covering her face, “Hey.”

She rolls over but doesn’t sit up. “Where the hell are we?”

I chuckle and then wince from the pounding in my head. “Fuck.”

“I don’t feel so well,” the girl says, and then a second later she starts puking.

My stomach rolls. I turn and walk away from her. It’s an asshole move but if I stay I’m going to puke too.

I throw on some shorts and go downstairs. There are a few guys sitting at the table. I go to the fridge and pull out a bottle of water. I twist the cap and start gulping it down when the girl from last night walks in looking like a hot mess.

She comes over and wraps her arms around my waist. “Last night was great.”

“Babe, it was just a piece of ass.” I say, releasing her arms from around me. I don’t do the whole cuddling shit the next morning, most of the time I’m already gone before dawn.

I sneak a glance at the girl; her mood has drastically changed in the last couple of seconds. She went from being all lovely, like we were going to start dating, to looking like she’d just been told that she was the worst lay ever. I shake my head and dismiss the girl like I do with the rest of them, just like yesterday’s trash.


My fault

- Mason -


I hear her gasp before I even see her. I know it’s her, I can feel Hailey. I know this looks all kinds of wrong but I was trying to figure out what the fuck Lily was talking about. She cornered me when I went to take a piss, telling me she knew shit that would fuck up a few relationships in my family. I got pissed off and forced her into the alcove in the wall, trying to intimidate her into telling me what she knows.

I didn’t think it could be about Hunter, at least I hoped it wasn’t. He’s learned his lesson, I think. Lily didn’t have shit on me and even if she did it wouldn’t affect me or Hailey. Hailey and I have a strong relationship now. She trusts me. I know everything there is to know about Cooper, so there isn’t anything there. He’s been crawled up Jaylinn’s ass for the last few years. Jackson and Chloe have been inseparable since high school so I’m not even entertaining that shit.

“Mason!” MacKenzie yells as she slides past a stunned Hailey.

As Lily starts to turn around I see what she is about to do. She reaches up and wipes her mouth with the back of her hand, smearing lipstick so it looks like we were hooking up. I have to hand it to Lily; she has balls, especially with my sister and Hailey standing right here. The stupid bitch just didn’t realize her mistake - I didn’t have lipstick smeared across my face. People would know she was lying.

“What the fuck, Mase?” MacKenzie seethes. She despises Lily and it’s showing in full force tonight.

One thing I’ve always tried to do is protect my family, and MacKenzie is always a top priority for me as she’s my baby sister. When all hell broke loose a few months back, and she found out about our dad, she refused to talk to any of us. When she finally started getting over the hurt she demanded that we trust her to be able to handle shit. We all agreed, I mean what choice did we really have? If she wants to deal with all the shit in the world then so be it. Now that MacKenzie knew everything, we all started to back off a bit. I backed off from being that overbearing, over-protective, big brother but I would never stop looking out for her. And that’s exactly what I’m doing now. She deserves to have her wedding with no drama.