Brianna sighed. "I'm not sure I know. I just? I couldn't stand being cooped up in that office for another minute. And this is probably one of the safest places I have ever known," hoping they would understand what she was saying.
Esmeralda and Saphira exchanged stares for a long moment before Esmeralda turned back to Brianna with a smile. "We're glad you think so," patting Brianna's hand. "Did you see Charisma today?" going right to the heart of the matter when she realized Brianna wasn't going to bring it up.
Anger flared in Brianna's eyes for a brief moment, then she visibly deflated, slumping back into her seat. "How do you do that?"
Esmeralda smiled gently. "It's a gift."
Brianna returned the smile sadly. "And your hobby as a student of human nature." Her smile became a little more genuine. "See... I *was* actually paying attention. I think it's the reason that, despite your warning to the contrary, I am still inclined to trust you."
"Why?"
Brianna shrugged. "I can't explain any more than that - it's just a gut feeling."
Esmeralda swallowed the last of her milk and spared Saphira a grateful smile when she removed her empty plate from in front of her so smoothly it didn't disrupt the atmosphere of confidentiality Esmeralda had created between herself and Brianna.
"And do you trust your gut, Brianna? Despite my warning, are you willing to risk it?"
Brianna held Esmeralda's gaze for a long moment before nodding slowly. "Yes," she finally decided aloud. "I have to."
"Tell me about your day, Brianna."
"I already did," Brianna frowned.
"Tell me about your day."
"What do you want from me, Esmeralda??" Brianna hissed as she jumped from the stool she'd been perched on. "Hmm??" leaning down into Esmeralda's personal space, surprised when the other woman made no movement to get away from her. "What the hell do you want from me?" she added in a defeated whisper.
Esmeralda caught Brianna's hand and guided her back to the chair she'd spent the evening in. "Brianna, I... *we*... don't want anything from you. This isn't about us; this is about you. If you trust me, you need to trust me with this - tell me about your day."
"It was like I told you. I really did spend most of my day unpacking as I'm sure you saw," smiling when Esmeralda nodded. "In fairness, it was necessary if only so I could begin my real work here in an organized space where I could find what I needed. I'm a little anal that way," Brianna confided. Saphira snickered, causing both blond heads to turn in her direction.
"You don't need to explain that compunction," Saphira offered with a smile. "You're talking to someone who cleans and organizes for a living." Esmeralda ducked her head to acknowledge the truth of Saphira's words.
"She has a point," Esmeralda agreed. "Of course, it takes one to know one in this case," she added.
Brianna chuckled. "When I grow up, I want to be just like you two." She sobered and took a deep breath. "In truth, finishing my unpacking and setting up my workspace was as much for my peace of mind as it was something to keep me from having to leave my office yesterday. Aside from having promised you the chance to moderate between us, I just.... Charisma was on the warpath from the moment she stepped foot into the building this morning - enough so that security sent us a warning to steer clear of her." She sighed and shook her head. "I knew when I accepted this appointment that it wasn't going to be easy - I did walk away from my best friend without a word of explanation and for someone as passionate as Charisma Tagherty has always been, there still has to be a lot of hurt and anger over that. I just... I never expected it to spill over onto the rest of the world like it did today."
"And you weren't ready to be her main target yet," Esmeralda stated with compassion.
Brianna looked at Esmeralda frankly. "I saw the expression on your face when you walked in here tonight, so I don't even need to answer that question, do I?" She blew out a deep breath. "Sorry - I know it makes me a coward. I just don't know how not to be... not in this. Twenty years of habit is hard to break."
"Does this mean you're going to keep running for the next couple years? Are you gonna play hide and seek to keep from interacting with Charisma on more than a professional level?" Esmeralda asked pointedly, though there was compassion in her gaze. Brianna studied her briefly before letting her eyes drop back down to the counter.
"It means, short of quitting, I'm going to do whatever it takes to get through the next two years." She paused. "What I would like to do is to rewind time... to go back to that airport in Barcelona and tell Charisma the truth. Then at least it would have been her choice... her decision to leave, and I wouldn't have to deal with all the backlash now." She looked up and blinked the tears from her eyes before turning to face Esmeralda again. "However, until good ol' Doc Brown builds that DeLorean time machine, complete with flux capacitor, I'm stuck living with the consequences of my actions. And if that means avoiding situations that put Charisma and I in the same sphere, then so be it. Because I know she refused your request."
Esmeralda cocked an eyebrow. "How do you know?"
Brianna's look was wry. "Because I'm a student of human nature too. And I heard her laying down the law to her staff... in no uncertain terms."
"And it hurt."
"More than I ever thought possible." Brianna sighed. "I thought I had put this behind me twenty years ago."
"You may have put it behind you, Brianna, but you never worked through it... never dealt with it. So now you have to deal with it and with Charisma's reaction to it." Esmeralda hesitated a moment, biting her lip in thought before nodding her head as though she had reached a decision. "I'm going to share something with you - something I've learned from experience over the years."
Brianna looked at her skeptically. Esmeralda didn't appear to be as old as Brianna herself, much less old enough to refer to her 'experience over the years'. A hard glance made her pause - there was an agelessness in Esmeralda's eyes - as though she had seen and lived lifetimes - and Brianna chanced to wonder just how old her friend really was. "Please," was all she said aloud.
"You commented yourself on Charisma's passionate nature," waiting for Brianna to nod her agreement. "That passion has to be focused somewhere. Right now, it is focused on the anger and betrayal she feels in regards to you. It's easy and it's familiar. And as long as you were outside her circle, it was easy to maintain. Eventually, though, it's going to have to come to a head - simply because you're close enough to confront."
"So you're saying...?"
"I'm saying a confrontation is going to happen. You need to decide how you're going to deal with it."
Brianna sat silently, waiting for Esmeralda to continue. When she didn't, Brianna sighed with exasperation. "That's it?? That's all you've got for me??"
Esmeralda squeezed the hands she still covered. "What would you like me to tell you, Brianna?"
"I would like you to tell me how to make this situation better. Or how to make it go away completely. Give me something... anything...."
"I can't solve this problem for you, Brianna. Only you can make those decisions."
"What would you do, Esmeralda? What did you do?"
"My situation was a little different than yours was, Brianna."
"How so?"
"Because I made the decision that could have cost us everything," Saphira said before Esmeralda could respond. "I chose to seek vengeance where it was felt vengeance wasn't warranted, and it nearly cost me... cost us... everything."
"I don't understand." Saphira parted her lips to speak again, but the minutest shake of Esmeralda's blonde head caused her to clamp her lips together and move away from them again without another word. Brianna turned back to meet Esmeralda's eyes. "Did I say something wrong?"
"Not at all, Brianna. It's just something that is very painful and very private and I won't put Saphira through that pain again. I can't... not even for you."
"Will you tell me what happened then?"
Esmeralda held Brianna's eyes. "Tell me, Brianna... do you regret having confided in me?"
Brianna opened her mouth to speak, then stopped short, giving serious contemplation to Esmeralda's words. "No," she said finally. "I actually feel... better... lighter. Like sharing with you made my burden less than it had been before." She bit her lip thoughtfully. "I never realized how it felt... carrying that around for so long. It's been such a part of me."
"And now?"
"Now? It's still there but not as great."
"So you still feel confident in trusting me?"
"Yes... absolutely."
"Then I am asking you to trust me again... right now. I will share with you what happened to Saphira and me one day, but not now and not when Saphira is around to hear the story."
"All right," Brianna drawled slowly. "Can I at least ask what you did?" When Esmeralda hesitated, Brianna hurried on. "You can trust me Esmeralda."
At this, Esmeralda smiled. "Of that I am sure, Brianna Walker. I trust my gut too," earning her the smile she was looking for. "I was trying to figure out the best way to put it because it doesn't put me in a very good light. You see, I did nothing."
"Excuse me?"
"I did nothing," Esmeralda repeated, her head hung down in shame. "The reason Saphira takes all the responsibility for what happened is because she was the stronger of us. She did what had to be done to keep us together."
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