now than before.”

She nodded as her eyes suddenly blurred with salt water.

“I should have told you that I loved you sooner. I should have

asked you to marry me. I thought I knew what was best for you. I

thought that we had all the time in the world.”

Julia tried to speak, but her voice caught in her throat.

“Please tell me that it isn’t too late, Julianne. Please tell me I haven’t lost you forever.”

She stared at him for a moment, and put her arms around him.

“I love you, Gabriel. I never stopped. We both made mistakes — with our relationship, with the university, with each other. But I hoped that you would come back to me. That you still loved me.”

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She kissed him on the lips, and Gabriel felt an overflowing of

joy mixed with guilt.

He was embarrassed, she could tell. But Julia also knew that his

damp eyes were the result of a myriad of things — exhaustion and

frustration, and the pain that lingers from a prolonged depression.

“Then you’ll stay?” His voice was soft.

She hesitated just long enough for him to feel worried.

“I want more than what we had before,” she said.

“More than I can give you?”

“Not necessarily, but I’ve changed over these past few month, and

I see that you have too. The question is, where do we go from here?”

“Then tell me what you want. Tell me and I’ll give it to you.”

She shook her head. “I want us to figure things out together.

And that will take time.”

P

Soon it was too warm to sit outside, so Gabriel and Julia returned to the house and settled themselves in the living room. He reclined on the leather sofa, while Julia made herself comfortable in one of the red velvet chairs.

“Should we address the elephant in the room?” she asked.

He nodded, suddenly tense.

“Um, I’ll start. I want to get to know you again. I want to be

your partner.”

“I want you to be a good deal more than that,” whispered Gabriel.

Julia shook her head vehemently. “It’s too soon. You took away

my choices, Gabriel. You have to stop doing that or we aren’t going to get very far.”

His face fell.

“What is it?” she asked, dreading his answer.

“I don’t regret trying to save your career. I wish we could have

come to a consensus about it. But when I saw you in danger, I reacted.

And what’s more, so would you if I were in danger.”

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Julia felt her anger rise. “So this whole conversation, your apologies, mean nothing?”

“Of course not! I should have talked to you before I did anything.

But if you expect me to be the sort of man who watches the woman he loves lose her dreams, then I can’t meet your expectations. I’m sorry.”

Julia flushed a brilliant red. “So we’re right back where we started?”

“I didn’t hold it against you when you went out of your way to

protect me from Christa, or from the committee. I didn’t hold your harassment email against you, even though we both agree it was a

mistake. Can’t you give me the same consideration? Can’t you give

me grace, Julianne? Your grace?”

Despite his pleading tone, Julia wasn’t listening. At that moment, all she heard was Gabriel discounting her objections. Again.

She shook her head and walked to the door.

Here was the fork in the road, where the paths diverged. She

could walk through the door, and everything with Gabriel would be

over. There would be no third chance. Or she could stay, knowing

that he refused to see his damned heroics in front of the committee as anything problematic.

She hesitated.

“Let me love you, Julianne. The way that you should be loved.”

He stood behind her, his lips vibrating against her ear. She could feel the warmth of his body radiating through her clothes and against her back.

“I am your faithful one, Beatrice. Of course I want to protect

you. Nothing will change that.”

“I would rather have had you than Harvard.”

“Now you can have both.”

She turned around. “At what cost? Don’t tell me that our situa-

tion didn’t damage us, possibly irreparably.”

He brushed her hair over one shoulder and pressed his lips to

the bare side of her neck. “Forgive me. I promise I won’t rob you of your dignity or our partnership. But I won’t stand by and watch you get hurt when I can prevent it. Don’t make me to revert to being a selfish bastard.”

In stubborn annoyance, Julia took a step toward the door, but

Gabriel caught her arm.

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“In a perfect world, there would always be communication and

consultation between partners. But we don’t live in that world. There are emergencies and dangerous, vindictive people. Is my desire to

keep you from harm so great a sin that you would leave me over it?”

When she remained silent, he continued. “I will do my utmost

to make decisions with you and not for you. But I make no apologies for wanting you to be safe and happy. I won’t be beholden to

the rule that I have to consult you before I act in cases of emergency.

“You want me to treat you like an equal. I want the same treatment.

That means that you need to trust me to make the best decision I can, given the information I have, without being omniscient. Or perfect.”

“I’d rather have you alive and carrying your shield than have you

dead and covered by it.” She sounded obstinate.

Gabriel laughed. “I think the battle of Thermopylae is behind

us, darling. But I share your sentiment and would ask the same of

you. My little warrior.”

He kissed her neck again. “Take my ring.” He quickly slipped the

wedding ring from his left hand and held it over her right shoulder.

“I wore this to signify the fact that my heart, my life was yours.”

She hesitantly took the ring from his hand and slipped it on

one of her thumbs.

“I’ll sell this damn house. I only bought it to be close to you. But I can find an apartment until we choose a home together.”

“You just moved in. And I know you love the garden.” Julia sighed.

“Then tell me what you want. We can take our time without

making promises about the future. But please forgive me. Teach me, and I promise I will be your most willing student . ”

When she was silent and unmoving for several minutes, Gabriel

took her hand, leading her from the living room upstairs to his

bedroom.

“What are you doing?” she asked as they approached the door.

“I need to hold you in my arms, and I think that you need to be

held. That damn sofa is too narrow for both of us. Please.” He led her to the bed and positioned himself on his back with open arms,

inviting her to wrap herself around him.

She hesitated. “What about Rebecca?”

“She won’t disturb us.”

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Julia was unwilling to return to his bed simply because he invited her, and so she looked around for something, anything, to distract him.

“What are these?” She pointed at what looked like two groupings

of large picture frames that were leaning against one of the walls and covered by a sheet.

“Look at them.”

Julia crouched down on the hardwood floor and removed the

sheet. There were about ten large photographs, stacked in two groups of five, all black and white. All featured Julia. Some included Gabriel.

She hadn’t seen most of them before as they had been framed after

their separation. There were photographs from Belize, from Italy, and posed photographs that had served as part of her Christmas present to Gabriel. All were startlingly beautiful and amative.

“It was difficult for me to look at them when I thought I’d lost

you. But as you can see, I kept them.”

Gabriel watched as Julia looked through the photographs once

more before studying his favorite, a picture of her lying on her stomach on a bed in Belize.

“What happened to the old ones? The ones you had before you

met me?”

“Long gone. I didn’t need or want them anymore.”

She placed the sheet over the pictures before walking to the bed.

She looked conflicted.

Gabriel reached out his hand. “Relax. I just want to hold you.”

She allowed herself to be pulled into his arms so she could nestle against his chest.

“That’s better,” he murmured, kissing her forehead. “I want to

earn your trust and your respect. I want to be your husband.”

Julia was quiet for a moment, holding her breath, as his words

sunk into her consciousness. “I want us to take things slowly. No

more talk of marriage.”

“Fortunately, I can wait.” He kissed her once again.

This time, the kiss escalated. Hands roamed to find purchase on

muscles and curves, mouths connected determinedly, punctuated by

sighs and almost breathless moans, hearts began to beat faster. It was a 352

Gabriel’s Rapture

kiss to mark a reunion, to pledge the continuation of fidelity and love.

Gabriel kissed her to show her that he loved her, that he was sorry.

Julia kissed him back to tell him that she could never give her