Maren squeezed his arm, her eyes softening, almost as if she knew exactly what he was feeling. Then she nodded toward the waiting minister, indicating they were all waiting for him to proceed.
It was then that he defied convention. He knew there were set rules about ceremonies. Hell, they’d even had a rehearsal—as if he needed to be coached on how to marry a woman that meant the world to him.
But none of that mattered. He couldn’t go another moment without holding her. Without kissing her and telling her he loved her. Now. Right now. Even before their vows.
He pulled her into his arms so that their child was solidly between them. His throat closed in when he felt the faint patter of a kick, almost as if their daughter understood what was happening. He lowered his mouth to Maren’s, kissing her softly at first and then more deeply, allowing every emotion to bleed into that kiss.
She sighed into his mouth. He heard light chuckles from the pews, but he ignored everything but the gorgeous woman in his arms. Shining brighter than the sun. Her love for him. There was nothing that compared.
The only thing lacking from this day was his own family. His parents and his brother, Griffin. But somehow he knew they were up there, smiling down on him and Maren and their daughter. He knew his father would be proud of him. He knew his mother would have loved Maren as much as he did.
When he finally pulled away, there must have been something in his eyes that told Maren what he was thinking. She reached up, ignoring protocol every bit as much as he was, and stroked her hand over his cheek and then down to his jaw.
“They’re here,” she whispered. “They’ve always been with you. And though I know you love and miss them, you do have family. Everyone here.”
She turned, gesturing to the assembled congregation, her smile warm and soft and so filled with love.
“They’re all your family. Mine too. We’re lucky, Steele. So very lucky. And now you have me and our daughter. You’ll always have us.”
The minister cleared his throat and there were smiles from his team and the Kelly wives who stood on either side of Maren and Steele, but he ignored them again as he pulled Maren to him one last time. The last time he’d hold her before they were officially pronounced man and wife.
“I love you,” he said fiercely. “Of anything I ever give you, know this above all else: You will always have my love.”
She smiled back, uncaring as he was that they were holding up the ceremony. “And you’ll always have mine, Jackson Steele. Now, what do you say we get married?”
TWO MONTHS LATER
Steele stood anxiously by Maren’s bedside, her fingers firmly entwined with his as she breathed through another contraction. God, how much longer would this go on? He’d been there when Rachel Kelly had delivered the twins, but it hadn’t taken this long, had it?
No, she’d had a C-section. It hadn’t taken but a few hours. Maren had been in labor for eighteen hours. Eighteen of the longest hours of his goddamn life. She had to be suffering. Her face was pale and sweaty, and yet she looked utterly serene, her eyes warm and full of love, even as she breathed through her contractions. She was taking this a hell of a lot better than he was, because he was about to lose his mind.
“How much longer?” he demanded, turning to the nurse.
The nurse smiled indulgently as if she were well used to harried husbands in the delivery room.
“Not long. She’s fully dilated. The doctor is on his way now.”
“He needs to hurry the hell up,” Steele muttered. “What if he doesn’t make it in time?”
Maren laughed and he marveled that she could possibly find amusement when her body was wracked with pain and she was exhausted from the long labor.
“If the doctor doesn’t make it on time, then I’ll still have the baby, Steele. Women do it all the time. I’m sure the nurse has plenty of experience in delivering babies.”
Steele scowled. “No way in hell I want our daughter delivered except by a qualified professional.”
The nurse sent him a look and snorted. “I’ll pretend I didn’t just hear that.”
Maren’s hand squeezed lightly over his. “It’ll be fine, Steele.”
Damn but he was a miserable failure at this. It should be him offering her comfort and reassurance. She’d been at this for so long and yet she was the one calming him. He crowded in closer to her, already recognizing the signs of another contraction. Maren went silent, her face pinched as she bore down. She closed her eyes and inhaled short breaths and then puffed them out again.
Her hand tightened around his, squeezing until he knew he’d bear marks from her fingernails. But he didn’t care. Hell, she could do whatever she needed. Any discomfort he felt was minimal compared to what she was going through.
He looked desperately at the nurse. “Isn’t there anything you can do? She’s hurting, damn it.”
The nurse’s gaze softened. “Childbirth isn’t painless, Mr. Steele. But Mrs. Steele is handling it very well. And as I said, it won’t be long now. I paged the doctor already and he’ll be here shortly. We’re preparing her for the pushing stage.”
He felt himself go pale. “Pushing stage? That sounds . . . bad.”
Maren laughed again. “If I don’t push, this baby will never be born, honey. It has to come out some way.”
He winced. “It still sounds painful as hell. What can I do, Maren? Tell me and I’ll do it, I swear. Tell me how I can make it better for you.”
Her eyes went soft with love. “You’re already doing it, Steele. You’re here. You love me. You’re holding my hand and offering me your support. That’s all you can do. The rest is up to nature. Try to relax. It won’t be long now, and you’ll be holding our daughter.”
He went still, dazed by the image of a tiny newborn infant, a miniature replica of Maren. He glanced down at his hands. Hands that could so easily hurt a fragile baby. What if he hurt her? What if he held her wrong? He’d only held one baby and that was for less than a minute when one of Rachel’s babies had been thrust into his arms.
“You’re thinking way too much,” Maren said, amusement thick in her voice. “Relax, Steele.”
Then she went silent again as another contraction gripped her. This one was stronger this time and it took longer. She was tense, her face a mask of pain and concentration. A small groan escaped, the first sound of distress that she’d made since her labor began.
He tamped down his panic. She didn’t need him to lose his shit now of all times. He was supposed to be the rock. The strong one. She was supposed to be leaning on him, not the other way around.
He bent and slipped his arm underneath her shoulders, lifting slightly and tightening his hold as he gripped her palm with his free hand.
“We’re almost there, honey. Just a little while longer. You can do this, Maren. You’re so damn strong. God, I’m so proud of you. Just think. In a short while we’ll meet our daughter.”
She sent him a grateful look and he mentally kicked himself in the ass for being such a pansy up to now. This was what she needed from him. Unwavering support. And she was damn well going to get it.
“Hold me like that,” she panted. “It’s more comfortable if I can lean up.” She glanced up at the nurse. “I need to push. Is the doctor coming? It’s time. I can’t stop it. I have to push.”
Okay, that didn’t help his panic, but he called upon the stoicism he was legendary for and didn’t let any of his fear show. He schooled his features and focused on Maren. He kissed her forehead and then wiped the hair from her sweaty brow.
The nurse stepped between her legs and then her eyes widened. “Yep, it’s definitely time. You’re crowning.”
Then, as if she hadn’t just dropped such a bomb—at least it was a panic-inducing bomb to Steele—she briskly lifted one of Maren’s legs into one of the stirrups. She gestured toward Steele, her intention clear that she wanted Steele to place her other leg in the stirrup. But that would require Steele letting go of Maren, and that wasn’t going to happen. He scowled and shook his head. The nurse rolled her eyes and then went to Maren’s other side and promptly positioned her leg accordingly.
Just then Doc Campbell strolled in, looking unhurried. He glanced at the nurse and then at Maren.
“I’d say it’s time, young lady. How about we get to the business of birthing this baby?”
Steele sighed in relief. He had to admit, he hadn’t been thrilled when Maren had insisted that Doc Campbell be the one to deliver their child. He wasn’t an obstetrician and he was older than dirt. But Maren had started working with him, slowly taking over his practice and Doc Campbell had scaled back on his hours, giving Maren more of the workload as she gained her bearings and got to know the community he served. As a result, she’d wanted him to deliver their baby. She trusted him, and the old man loved her instantly. As long as he safely delivered their child, Steele could deal. But at the first sign of problems, he was going to demand an obstetrician take over.
Maren squeezed Steele’s hand and struggled to sit up more. He didn’t know how in the hell it could possibly be comfortable to put her chin so far toward her chest with her legs in those damn contraptions, but she seemed to want it that way so he gently helped her, supporting her back and pushing in closer so she was nestled against him.
“When the next contraction begins, I want you to take a deep breath and hold it and push,” Doc Campbell said as he pulled on gloves.
Maren nodded and then tensed. Steele immediately went on alert. This was it. Holy shit, but this was it. Soon he’d be holding his daughter. It boggled his mind and damn near knocked him to his knees.
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