Danielle Steel - Family Ties

“I hate this part,” Annie said miserably, “where what they do now impacts their future. The stakes are so much higher as they get older. It was so much easier when they were little.”

“No, it wasn’t. You were scared shitless you were doing it wrong with someone else’s kids. You’ve just forgotten.”

“Maybe I have,” Annie said sadly. “He’s a nice boy,” she said about Paul. “I like him. I just don’t want her to wind up halfway around the world, living in Tehran. I don’t want to lose her.”

“Have a little faith in Katie. She’s not going to want that either. She’s very close to all of you, and she’ll probably wind up living in New York. Besides, Paul lives in New York, and so do his parents. Stop imagining that she’s marrying him and moving around the world. You’re driving yourself crazy for nothing.” Whitney tried to calm her down, and Annie knew that what she had said was true. As agonizing as it was, she was going to have to learn to let go one of these days, and maybe that time had come, whether she liked it or not.

She was sitting on her bed thinking about it when Katie walked into the room. Paul had left. She had a dreamy look on her face and smiled shyly at her aunt. Annie’s heart sank when she saw her. She had never seen anyone so in love. And being that much in love put her at serious risk for a broken heart if things didn’t work out as she hoped. And at twenty-one, no romance was likely to be forever. The last thing Annie wanted for her was to see her get hurt or even disappointed. She would have liked to keep her in a cocoon and protect her for the rest of her life.

“He’s a nice boy,” Annie said cautiously, not sure what else to say to someone who looked like she was floating on a cloud. “He has beautiful manners, he’s intelligent, and he’s very good looking, and he seems like a nice person.”

“He’s a wonderful person,” Katie said, instantly defending him, as though she thought she had to.

“I’m sure he is,” Annie said quietly, venturing into dangerous waters. “But he comes from a very different culture. It’s something for you to consider.” Katie glared at her with instant hostility in answer, ready to go to war, which was what Annie was afraid of. She didn’t want to lose her yet to, or over, this boy or any other. Nothing was worth that.

“What difference does it make? He’s American. He lives in New York, and he’s not going back to Iran, except to visit. His life is here, just like mine.”

“That’s good. But he may have different ideas than you do. His family isn’t American, or his relatives in Iran. I know you don’t think so, but that makes a difference. If you married him, how would you raise your children? What would he or his family expect of you? You’d always feel like an outsider or a foreigner. Katie, if you’re serious about him, you have to think about that. You come from different backgrounds. It worries me for you.” Annie was as honest with her as she could be in voicing her concerns.

“I can’t believe how bigoted you are. What bothers you? That his skin is darker than mine? Who fucking cares?”

“Of course not. But I’m concerned that his ideas are different than ours, maybe too different. His parents may think so too, about you.”

“You’re ridiculous,” Katie said with a look of youthful contempt. “You don’t even have a man in your life. You never have. You live like some kind of nun, for chrissake. What do you know about loving someone and building a life with them?”

“Not much,” Annie admitted with tears in her eyes. Katie had hit hard, and low. “I just want you to understand what you might be headed for. It’s true for any relationship. Backgrounds, family customs, and traditions do matter between two people, even if they love each other. I just want what’s best for you.” She didn’t respond to the rest of what Katie had said. She didn’t say that she had lived like a nun because she raised three kids at twenty-six, and the man she’d been in love with at the time had dumped her because she had taken on three children who weren’t her own, or that she hadn’t had time to take anyone seriously since, because she was too busy driving carpool and going to the orthodontist and soccer games. She said none of that and focused the conversation on Katie and Paul, where it belonged.

“I’ll do what seems right to me,” Katie said, staring at her in fury, and Annie nodded, remembering Whitney’s warnings to her an hour before, that it was their lives and they had a right to make their own mistakes and she had to let go. She was trying, but it was hard. And who knew if her relationship with Paul was a mistake? Maybe it wasn’t.

“I love you, Katie,” Annie said quietly in response, and with that Katie stormed out of her room and slammed the door. All Annie wanted for her was a good life.

Annie lay in her bed that night, thinking about Katie and what they’d said. And she wondered if she was wrong. Maybe she had no right to say anything. Paul seemed like a good person, maybe that was enough. Maybe coming from two different cultures didn’t matter and she was wrong. What right did she have to tell Katie who to love and how to live? Maybe Katie would be happy with him. Who was she to judge? And Katie was right about some of it. Annie did live like a nun. For all intents and purposes, her life as a woman had ended at twenty-six. And at forty-two, it seemed too late to get it started again. She had traded a life with a man for them, and she didn’t regret the trade. She had no history of relationships to draw from. And all she knew about the Iranian culture was what she’d read. It wasn’t the life she would have chosen for Katie, but she had a right to choose it for herself.

And as Annie lay in bed, she thought about Ted too, and wondered about the mystery woman who was distracting him. He had seemed dazed through all of Christmas and had disappeared on Christmas night. She had never seen him like that. And she was convinced that Liz was wasting her time with men like Jean-Louis. Liz was having fun and enjoying her career, but guys like Jean-Louis were never going to take care of her, they were too obsessed with themselves. It was hard watching the three of them grow up.

Annie had a headache when she woke up the next day. Ted and Katie were both already out, and neither had left her a note about their plans. She knew that at their age, they didn’t owe her explanations about where they went, and she had no right to ask. Thinking about both of them, Annie made herself a cup of tea and went out for a walk. Whitney called on her cell phone, and she told her about the argument with Katie the night before.

“She’s got to defend the relationship, no matter what she really thinks. She can’t admit to you that you’re right or that she may have questions about it herself. None of us want to admit that we’re not sure of what we’re doing. It’s easier for her to attack you. And saying what you think isn’t such a bad thing. Katie knows that your heart is in the right place. Now just back off and see what she does. And have a little fun yourself for a change. Are you coming to New Year’s Eve? It might do you good to get out of the house for a night.”

“I don’t want to ditch them on New Year’s Eve.”

“Hello? Are you kidding? We’ve been over this before. They’re going to ditch you. They’re grown up. They’ve got their own plans. And I want to introduce you to Fred’s friend. He’s a terrific guy.” As Whitney said it, Annie remembered Katie’s comment of the night before, that she lived like a nun. She was forty-two, not ninety-five. Maybe Katie and Whitney were right. At least she had to try. She didn’t want to die alone, and if she had another forty or fifty years ahead of her, a little companionship might be nice.

“Okay. I’ll come,” Annie said, as though she had just agreed to have her liver pulled out through her nose.

“Great!” Whitney sounded thrilled. “You can spend the night. You shouldn’t drive back alone. Think of it, this may be the beginning of a hot romance and a whole new life for you. You’re going to love this guy.” It had been years since Annie had agreed to a blind date, long enough to forget how disappointing they were. But at least it was something to do on New Year’s Eve. And Whitney was right. The kids probably had their own plans.

Annie didn’t see Ted or Katie until the following day, and she mentioned to them both that she was going to Whitney and Fred’s on New Year’s Eve. Had they objected, she would have canceled, but as Whitney had predicted, they both said they had plans with friends. Annie didn’t say another word to Katie about Paul. She had said enough, and Katie was still angry at her when Annie left for New Jersey on the afternoon of New Year’s Eve.

Annie arrived at Whitney and Fred’s house in Far Hills at six o’clock. There had been very little traffic, and she made good time. She had brought a simple black evening dress and hung it in the backseat. Their three boys were playing basketball in the backyard when she arrived. They were fourteen, sixteen, and seventeen, and all three of them looked like Fred, with freckles and red hair. They were all sports nuts like their father, and their oldest son was currently applying to college. He wanted to go to Duke and do pre-med, like his father. The boys waved to her when she arrived.

Fred was an orthopedic surgeon and had done well. He wasn’t a man whom Annie would have chosen, but Whitney was happy and had a good life with him. He had a big ego and had always been impressed with himself, but he was a good father and husband, a good provider, and a responsible person. Annie had always respected him for that.

As she walked into their house after Whitney hugged her, Annie saw that the dining table was beautifully set with gleaming silver and crystal, and there were white flowers and silver streamers everywhere. The evening looked more elaborate than she’d expected.