Lexi Blake - Dungeon Royale

“He thinks I’m a weakness for you.”

Damon nodded slowly. “Which is precisely why I need to leave you behind. Our relationship ends here and now.”

Her heart nearly plunged to her shoes. It was over? So quickly? She’d known it would end, known it wouldn’t last long, but she’d wanted her weeks with him. She’d wanted a few weeks where she did more with her life than stare at a computer, translating mostly mundane conversations, listening in on other people’s lives.

She knew it was stupid. Just the day before she’d decided to guard herself against him, but she didn’t want to go back to the way it had been. She couldn’t stand the thought of him glancing her way without so much as a smile, just one of the hundreds of women who had loved him and who meant nothing to him now.

God, she was in love with Damon. It was silly to even think it wasn’t true. She’d been in love with him for a very long time.

He stared down at her, his jaw tight. “I won’t talk to you, Penelope. I won’t acknowledge your presence when you walk in a room. I will pretend you don’t exist. This was all about one single operation. That operation is over for you. I can’t use you anymore.”

She felt tears slipping from her eyes. She reached up and cupped his cheek. “Damon, I want to go with you. I don’t care about the risk.”

It didn’t matter that there were other people in the room. She couldn’t be one more person who disappeared on him.

He stepped away, his face going cold, eyes blank. “Penelope, I’ve done you a great disservice.”

“Don’t, Damon. I know what you’re going to do. Don’t.”

He didn’t look away from her. He looked right through her, like she was already gone, already relegated to some place in his mind where he shoved useless things. “I needed you to obey me. Getting you to believe yourself to be in love with me was the easiest way to go. You know I made a study of you. You were lonely. You had very little experience with sex. It was simple. I do have experience. I knew exactly what to say to you.”

Her heart was breaking because she did believe that he would do everything he said he would. He would walk away from her. He wouldn’t speak to her again. She would dream about him for the rest of her life and his last words to her would be about how he’d tricked her. “You told me it was real.”

He shrugged a bit, an aristocratic gesture. “I lied. Getting in your knickers was the best way to control you. You can’t honestly believe I was attracted to you.”

“You certainly looked like you were.” It came out as an accusation.

A nasty smirk hit his face. “Darling, I can get an erection from a stiff breeze.”

So the bit about his cock not working around anyone but her had been a lie, too.

“Don’t call me that. Don’t call me that again.” His endearments meant nothing. They were one more way he’d drawn her in.

Something died a bit. A light that had started to grow inside her dimmed again. It had been foolish of her to believe him. She looked in the mirror on a regular basis. No amount of makeup would ever make her really beautiful. The people at the wedding had stared at them, but not because they looked right together. They stared because they wondered what the hell he was doing with her.

He was good. He’d known exactly how to get past her walls. He’d defended her, built up her self-esteem. He’d been just vulnerable enough to make her think they really did have something in common. She’d started to believe she was good for him.

She’d have to tell her sister and brother it had all been a joke. A joke on her.

“I’m sorry, Miss Cash.” He didn’t sound sorry. He sounded bland, blank, distant. But then he’d always been. The connection she’d felt had been one sided. Otherwise, there was no way he could hurt her like this. Love didn’t work that way. Even friendship didn’t work like that.

She’d been safer in her shell.

“Why did you sleep with me? I offered to do the job without sex.” She was proud of how steady her voice was. She was calm again. This wasn’t anything that hadn’t happened to her before. It would likely happen again unless she simply shut down.

“I told you. I was training you to obey me. The easiest way to ensure a woman’s compliance is to make her happy in bed. It’s so much easier if the woman’s never had a real lover. It wasn’t some grand romance, Penelope. It’s part of my job.”

And she knew what he would do for his job. He would kill himself for it so sleeping with a woman he found a bit distasteful was likely simple for him.

He’d needed someone pliable, someone smart but naïve. If she looked at it logically, she was rather perfect.

“Are you all right? You went pale. Do you need to sit down?” Damon was looking at her with something akin to pity.

“I’m fine. I believe I’ll go to my desk and clear it out.”

He frowned. “You’re not fired, Miss Cash.”

“Oh, Mr. Knight, I do believe I quit. I expect my belongings back in my home by tonight.” She turned to Nigel, praying she got through the next few minutes with some semblance of dignity. “Thank you for everything, sir. I’m sorry it ended like this.”

Nigel sat down, shaking his head. “I told you this was a bloody bad idea, Knight. I really hope you’re happy with yourself.”

“Damon, we have a problem.” Tennessee’s voice broke through her gloom, and she was suddenly deeply aware that she wasn’t alone with him. Two men had witnessed her humiliation.

Damon turned to him, every inch the competent agent. “Of course. We can discuss it after Penelope leaves. I would rather not compromise the mission further.”

Tennessee sighed. “You’ve already compromised it, and now we’re all royally screwed. He didn’t just kill Harris. He’s threatened to out undercover agents across the globe if you don’t show up with her.”

Nigel cursed under his breath. “Miss Cash, your resignation is rejected. You will keep your cover with Knight. You’ll be issued a sidearm this afternoon. Please don’t use it on him, though I wouldn’t blame you if you did.”

Damon cursed.

She shook her head. “No. I can’t. I can’t be around him anymore.”

Nigel passed her the file. “I’m afraid you’re going to have to.”

With shaking hands, she took the file. “May I read it at my desk?”

“Of course. Take a few moments.” Nigel nodded her way. “But I really can’t let you leave.”

She turned and walked out the door. She was suddenly afraid there was no way out of the trap. None at all.

Damon called out for her, but she kept walking. She might not be done with the operation, but she was certainly done with him.

Tears blurred her eyes, but she brushed them away as she sat down and opened the file. It was time to work. If there was one thing in the world Penelope Cash understood, it was duty.

Damon let the door slam shut before rounding on Tennessee Smith. He was killing mad. Her face. Her sweet face had gone blank and he’d known he’d just destroyed something lovely and fragile. Now Ten just happened to mention that it was all for nothing?

“You couldn’t have said something when you walked past the bloody door?”

Ten just smirked. “Hey, I always like a little drama, man.”

Damon got in his face. “Do you understand what you did?”

“I understand what you did. I understand that you fucked that girl and then broke her heart. That was quite easy to see. Don’t worry about it. Baz’ll probably kill her, but then you won’t give a shit. She’s just a pawn, right?”

Rage boiled and he couldn’t stop himself. He reared back and his fist met Ten’s jaw. He was satisfied with the way his hand cracked, the way Ten stumbled back.

Ten dropped his usual charming-guy act, his eyes hardening. “I’ll take that once, Knight, because I think you just figured out how much you fucked up your own life, but don’t try it again. You won’t like the outcome.”

“Knight, you will stand down!” Nigel got between the two of them, his face a bright red. “I told you it was a bad idea.”

“I was trying to protect her.” He couldn’t let Baz have her. He couldn’t allow it. Since Baz seemed determined to take everything Damon gave a damn about, he couldn’t keep Penelope. Baz had killed Jane without a thought, but he would likely torture Penelope. He would make her hurt.

“You protected her by ripping her heart out and stomping all over it in front of everyone?” Ten asked.

“I had to. You don’t understand her. She wouldn’t have left me.” Penelope would have stood by his side no matter what the cost. She was brave and smart, and for some reason, she’d started to love him. He wasn’t a fool. He knew she was attracted to him. He’d used it to his advantage, but it wasn’t until a few moments ago that he realized how deep her feelings went. She’d declared to everyone that Baz couldn’t break them up, that she was here for him.

He believed her.

Which was why he had to let her go.

Ten snorted, his hand rubbing along his jawline. “It didn’t occur to you to talk to her about the situation? To sit her down and give her your logic?”

“She wouldn’t have left me.” She would have found a way. She hadn’t left him in the Tube station despite his direct orders. Baz could have taken her out while she held his unconscious body.

“Well, I doubt she’ll give a damn about you now.” Nigel moved back to his desk. “What a bloody mess. We need her. Do we know how thoroughly compromised we are?”

Ten glared his way but took a seat across from Nigel. “He doesn’t specify which operation he’s targeting, but he mentioned Afghanistan and Pakistan. We have twenty operatives in those countries under various covers. Some of them have been working their way into terrorist cells for years. If we have to pull them, it’s a massive setback.”